i think Im done with Mumsnet

[Spacemen3]

this is my last hope!

I know there has been a lot of threads moaning about 'how its not like the good old days'....but its REALLY changed. It really has.

Chat is infested with sexism and racism, and it goes unchallenged. nothing massive and really overtly offensive. But just the vibe/culture...lots of low level stuff

IT was not like this even 1 year ago

do you think? or is it just me?

Its called something like big brother controversy.

i also feel very depressed by the Katie Whatserface thread. I know i dont have to read threads that i am not interested in, but its basically 500 posts going 'im not Katie Hopkins'

House, that thread is at least confirming to me something I had thought about certain regular posters for some time

then you see a couple of reasonable posts from them and you forget

and then you remember

Yes

Yes, AnyFucker. I see posters on AIBU or chat and I nod along in agreement and then they post on relationships and I think WTF?!

Really disappointing.

Spaceman, hi. Fellow LP of two here. I wish I had found MN sooner tbh.

Yes there is some shit stuff on here now and yes it needs challenging. I take a break occasionally. The CE stuff in RL has been grim. I was pleased to see The Last Leg in RL back up the majority MN stance. 'Don't rape.'

Hello OP

I think it is being challenged on here. I posted a most unacceptable post the other day and was one partly to blame on the victim blaming thread.

Whilst it was far from my intention, it came across that way and rightly so was deleted and I received a warning.

I was asked to read the we believe you campaign and could see how my comments had offended people even though I would never have set out to do that.

Sometimes people just need it pointing out to them and the opportunity to realise they were wrong, see it from another perspective apologise, and move on.

YY House

It's really depressing.

We have SO far to go. Even women aren't on the side of feminism.

It's funny, posters apologists are popping up on site stuff saying 'no more CE threads' and I'm almost agreeing with them because the threads flush out so many rape apologists that it's making MN look really shit.

(Obviously I jest, not having the threads isn't the answer!)

I had to stop looking at that thread in relationships, although I'm back now.

I've found MN a haven for being able to talk about stuff like women's space and women's boundaries, which would get you ripped apart on twitter. There's some amazing women here, and I've been incredibly heartened by readfing what they write.

On non-feminist threads, though, I've been mightily depressed at some of the blatant racism.

morethanpotatoprints
That's a positive outcome.

FWR or ( just "F" now?) is the most hospitable place on MN.

The biggest issue I have with MN is the casual unthinking ageism that is rampant (much less a problem on FWR, btw), but I think that MNHQ is now mindful of this issue and willing to tackle it. Otherwise, I would have left a few months ago because it was becoming very depressing.

archery I think its the racism ive been struggling with of late, and Islamaphobia, rather than the sexism etc. I suppose perception depends what's going in in RL for people at that particular time

Good for you, morethan

I have certainly had to admit to myself when I have a skewed perspective or not thought through my arguments properly and this part of MN helps to keep me on the straight and narrow

In fact, it was someone's comment who I recognise from here on another thread that made me think I had been been a bit of a bitch

Sorry, didn't finish my sentence

that I had been a bit of a bitch recently

I've been on here for 9 years now and don't see much change. The people who gripe are generally the ones who won't accept that other people may hold opinions different to them. There are of course the usual hypocrits who moan on about other people but are abusive and unreasonable themselves, generally "royalty".

I don't think I'm in that bracket victorine

AnyFucker
The written word is hard to convey what you mean sometimes (it is for me anyway), sometimes I write something and think its going to be taken the wrong way by someone so just delete it.
That's why I also tend to use so many , etc so hopefully there are no miscommunication.

Iam

I do that, but don't always see what I've done.
I do also have problems with communication that have got me into all sorts of trouble in the past.

I have decided to be careful what threads I post on now and also not to post too quickly after reading the OP and other comments. To stop and think a bit more.

Unfortunately that doesn't always happen though and I hate offending people, life is too short to go out of your way to do this.
Unfortunately, many on here are out to offend so if you aren't careful people think you are being offensive on purpose.

morethan, I find an acknowledgement you got it wrong or an apology to an individual on thread goes a long, long way

a proper apology....not one of those "I am sorry you are offered, but...." ones

I have done it loads, often to make up for a kneejerk response that I later thought WTF

*offended