No Miss, no Ms... just Mrs

[guinnessgirl]

Hi all. First op on this board so please be gentle!

I was reading this blog post recently, and it really got me thinking. vagendamagazine.com/2014/09/why-you-shouldnt-bother-calling-yourself-ms/

I disagree with the idea at the end about us all being Mr, but the idea of all adult women being Mrs really appeals to me. As the writer says, for good or bad it's the highest status title of the three that we currently use, and it's got a direct parallel in Mr.

What do you think? And do you think there's any real hope of change if enough women adopted it?

Like san - Sirchenjin-san has a nice ring to it. Much better than Mzzzz

What does san actually mean?

scone - oops,I've heard people say 'Mizz' in the US and assumed your lot were just always miles ahead of us!

Afaik san is a term for adults of both genders who are your peers

Oh, that's a good one then.

Jeanne Based on threads on MN, I think we are miles ahead on this one, but the pronunciation aspect helped move it along.

I have speculated before that titles seem much more important in the UK than in the US, perhaps because y'all have so many more to choose from: lord, lady, sir, dame, etc.

I can completely believe it would help.

I do think it's bollocks when people say that 'Ms' is unpronounceable, but I think it's that they know if they say it, it will be obvious they are one of these weirdo feminists. Must be much easier in a context where you just sound regional/ordinarily polite.

I can't really buy that about more titles, though.

My (totally subjective) sense is that in the UK, not using any title is more normal than in the US.

Also (IME) Americans get on first name terms sooner. (slight tangent - 'Mr President' popped into my head, would Hillary be Mrs President if she's elected or Ms President?)

What is the purpose of a title? I don't mean dr or prof etc but Mr, Mrs etc? Afaicansee the only purpose is marking gender and a woman's marital status? If that's the case why can't we just not bother? Address Elsie Smith not Mrs Smith? If Elsie is a dr then it would be Dr Elsie Smith. What would be wrong/difficult about that?

I'm Dr. I refuse to use Mrs/miss/Ms, and often put mr on a drop down menu when there's no choice for Dr.

I've had people (yes you, easyjet) get very cross when the Dr title has meant I turn up and gasp I'm female, when they were expecting a male.

I would drop ALL titles. Prof/Dr etc is totally irrelevant outside of the workplace, Mr/Mrs/Ms/Miss defines gender (again, totally irrelevant imo), and don't get me started on Duke/Countess etc. That being said, I do also recognise that people prefer to have the choice as to which title they use as opposed to being told what they should/shouldn't do.

Can I just start calling myself Dame Weegie, or do I need permission?

Hillary would be Madam President as she was Madam Secretary.

I like miss as a solution and a world where nobody changes their title or surname upon marriage.

But we don't have all this business of having to pick a title on forms, with the bank, etc. that I see complained of on here all the time. I can't remember the last time I was asked for a title in the US.

I am not certain Dr/Prof is necessary within the workplace, either.

If you work in a hospital, surely, you don't go round checking if John Smith is Dr John Smith or John Smith, nurse before you ask him to whip out someone's spleen and it's even less necessary in academia.

Bleugh at 'Madam President'.

Oh yes of course,thanks - like we have Mister/Madam Speaker in parliament.

Fair point, scone. I suppose what I mean is, in day-to-day life, people seem to say things like 'excuse me, mister' or 'excuse me, ms' to me in the US. Over here it's either 'pet' or 'love' in the north or 'you' in the south.

Oh, that's true, Jeanne, except in the South, it's sir and ma'am.

Titles in the workplace define rank and role, and I think it's probably helpful for patients to know which staff group they are dealing with, for example. The Drs I work with don't tend to introduce themselves as Dr so and so though ' unless they are of the old "do you know who I am" school.

The daughters of our old neighbour from South Carolina used to call us Missy followed by our first name. Used to quite like that - felt as if I was in Gone with the Wind

I have to say that I thought that Ms was pronounced the same way as those from the Southern States say Mrs, which is lovely.

Highest status? Do people really think like that in this day and age? I had no clue people were assigning status on the basis of my title, if they are I'd better use the Dr more!

That's still very common, SirChenjin. It's usually Miss and Mr followed by first name. It's a rite of passage in the South when sometime in the early to mid-teens, a young person will be invited to drop the Miss and use just the first name.

We had a five year old neighbor who had trouble remembering DH's name so he just called him Mr. Man.