primary school - gender stereotyping

[pinguina]

Hello
I live in the Midlands with DH and 2DD aged 4 and 6. On Friday I received the school newsletter with this info: in order to improve their writing by giving them topics they are interested in, the children in my eldest DD's class have been split into groups, boys and girls. (I quote verbatim): boys' activities include climbing ropes, bending it like Beckham and making paper planes. Girls have been learning how to give a hand massage, how to make an entrance and strike a pose.This afternoon they will be getting together to put on a fashion show.
Is it 1954 and I hadn't noticed? I went to complain to the headteacher. What would you do?

oh. good. grief.

They don't have a clue do they?

I was told by my sons teachers they do more boys geared topics as girls tend to write about anything , boys generally if they are interested but not heard of such an obvious divide before. I would complain too

All the topics sound like crap.

I think I would struggle to go in and have a level headed discussion about this! I can't believe that they actually did this!

Definitely complain - they all sound awful and far too specific. They should be looking at broader topics that engage everyone - and the girls stuff sounds vile. Why would a little girl need to give a hand massage? Yuck

Having a more stereotypically boy/girl topic every now had been shown to have fantastic results but only when the topic is high quality to begin with. Both the topics sound pretty awful but the girls' spectacularly so.

What did the head say?

They can't seriously have thought that was acceptable, can they? It's just... I mean... you can't... words fail me. I am gobsmacked.

If that's what they are doing overtly, and being proud enough of doing to put in the newsletter, then what the HECK are they doing subtly and without thinking?

I clicked on this thinking it would be about some sort of subtle distinction (e.g. is low level disruption tolerated more from boys than from girls?) as that's the kind of question that's been occupying me lately. I can't believe that schools are still stereotyping in the way you describe! What did the head say?

That is really crap. I'd complain.

But surely that's fine - girls have to know how to look good and pamper themselves if they want to fit in and let's be honest it's never to early to make sure they know they have to be pretty. The boys meanwhile need a bit of sport and engineering for their active bodies and minds. Sounds like the teacher has managed to address all of this and tie in some literacy too! What's not to like?

The headteacher was incredibly defensive but supported the view that they were trying to improve the children's writing by giving topics they enjoyed discussing... at that I lost it and said rather tightly that I was horrified, that I wanted my girls to think they could be prime ministers if they chose to and not hairdressers. Aim high, no? She said the teacher who had written the newsletter was going to contact me later to discuss it. Am trying to rally other parents but some seemed to think fine, as their children enjoyed it!

that's awful!

Well done you complaining. Just absurd (and hugely depressing) that this is regarded as appropriate by anyone in this day and age.

When the teacher calls you ask who came up with the topic ideas in the first place. If the topics are child initiated/led you've got a slightly more difficult complaint on your hands vs the teachers themselves coming up with the topic themes.

Oh wow, that is awful. I gave feedback to my DC school on my disappointment they felt the need to gender stereotype with pink name badges for girls, and blue name badges for boys. This, I would be marching down to the head's office for a word.

This kind of crap is damaging to both boys and girls. There are so many things already trying to divide and pigeon hole my children into assigned gender roles (looking at you clarks shoes) that it is really important schools remain all-inclusive and gender neutral.

Oh God, had I been one of the little girls at the school I would have been so upset by this. I would have hated the girls' topics and thought the boys' topics didn't involve enough mud.

I would be horrified if my dd were taught that "striking a pose" or "making an entrance" even existed as a thing.

I would want to know what my dcs were being taught about equality and the importance of looks.

Just horrible.

I would go berserk over this. The subtle stuff is bad enough. My DD took a Spider-Man ballon into reception the other day and her teacher told the other kids it must be her brothers ballon. I was fuming but let it lie. I would be putting in a serious complaint about this. My DD would be really upset

If the topics were child generated then I would still think it should be the choice for each child to chose what they do rather than a boy/girl split. I do also think that teaching staff should have been more careful to steer choices if it was child led though. I'm really shocked that "how to make an entrance and strike a pose" was considered acceptable.

Pink stinks might be interested in this, or could help you formulate an argument as to how damaging it is.

Wow - yes, do complain. I would be furious.

At our 3 form state school there are at least 5 girls in reception who seriously hate girl stuff and dress like boys and love boy stuff as they call it. What messages does this send ????

Well done for complaining. Might be worth pointing out that the phrase "Bend it like Beckham" refers to a film about a girls football team.