This post on 10 things about raising boys has given me The Rage

[foxinthebox]

m.today.com/parents/10-things-i-wish-id-known-about-raising-boy-1D79911267

It appeared on my Facebook page and I am raging. I have both genders and these cultural stereotypes just make so angry.

Why do mothers enforce these boys run around more and get hurt rubbish?

What about it? It represents my experience and I have both genders. I'd be more interested in the raising girls one. Not all boys or girls fit stereotypes like all situations.

Here's the equivalent raising girls one:

m.today.com/parents/9-things-i-wish-id-known-about-raising-girl-1D79911270

for some more stereotypical twaddle to get upset about.

From that list I can confirm that I buy stuff they don't need; they like to borrow my handbags and shoes; they reached many developmental milestones "early"; I'm enjoying reading childhood favourites to them; my eldest is a horder. Both my DC are boys.

m.today.com/parents/10-things-i-wish-id-known-about-raising-boy-1D79911267

BOYS

1. There will be planes, trains and automobiles.

Yes

1. Boys don’t stop moving.

My boy didn't

1. Clothes shopping will be a piece of cake.

No, he has sensory issues and can't cope with patterns

1. His fascination with his penis starts sooner than you think.

Not really

1. Roughhousing is innate.

He enjoyed it

1. You’ll probably make a trip to the emergency room.

Several

1. Pee will be everywhere. Everywhere.

Never

1. You’ll learn not to compare your son to girls.

Or other boys.

1. The goofiness starts early.

Yes, but so did his sister

10. Boys adore their moms. He still does.

GIRLS

1. You'll buy her stuff she doesn't need.

I did with both of them

1. She may be way girlier than you are.

Not really, neither of us is 'girly'

1. Her desire to borrow your heels, jewels, handbags and more will start as soon as she can walk and talk (and grow from there).

DS was much keener on jewellery and shiny stuff than she was.

1. Everything starts early.

Yes

1. She'll strike a sexy pose.

No, still doesn't unless she's deliberately messing around.

1. You'll relish the excuse to read "Black Beauty," "Nancy Drew" and Judy Blume again.

I read both of mine my favourite books, not including the three listed.

1. She'll likely go through an "I'm only wearing dresses" phase.

Never did.

1. She'll hoard ... everything.

No, that's DS

1. You'll fight over her hair constantly.

No, she likes it clean and tidy.

Any list that includes a need for an infant girl to wear 'bottom covers' over her pants when she's playing in a dress is weirdly anal and twisted IMO.
Does anyone with a modicum of intelligence take these seriously, or just as a bit of fluff akin to the 'Which Game of Thrones/Disney princess/animal avatar are you? quizzes?

Two boys, like chalk and cheese.

My son painted his nails to be like his sisters. One friend pursed her lips and told me how she was 'more traditional' She is one of the main 'all boys are such truck playing monkeys aren't they?'.

My friends with the more macho sons and docile girls are constantly issuing reinforcing statements. I would be really interested to meet someone who has not and see their children. I suspect that I go the other way, though I make an effort to be fair. It does help that my eldest do is easily the most sporty and my other do us the more confident and thus had more visits to a&e.

Exactly, generalisations are exactly that and little use in most cases.

My brother, sister and I were raised 'stereotype free' by our feminist parents.

Guess what, my sister and I love shoes, my brother loves driving.

Well, in my case, for each young child I know both lists are about 50% accurate (and for what I remember of me as a kid - and I'm a woman)

Just munge them into one big child list, and it'll be as useful as it was before, but without the stereotyping.

I got this on fb too. Shared by 2 women who only have boys.

I wanted to scream 'they are not all like that- my dd ticks lots of those boxes too' but I restrained myself.

I have one of each and there are some stereotypical differences between them but I blame socialisation/ nursery/media/Disney etc for that, not innate ness.

I have experienced 4/10 of the boys list with my DS and 4/10 of the girls list too. Load of bollocks.

Morris. I love driving and shoes.

Weatherall. Why do think that is? Mine came from son only families too.

What a load of gender stereotype nonsense. People believe this shit though don't they so they encourage their children to fit into their own narrow expectations of gender norms, then say look - boys are like this, girls are like that.

The only friend I have on FB who shares this kind of crap has only boys. It drives me bonkers. It's so unnecessary.

There is bugger all evidence that differences between genders in childhood are inherent, and loads of evidence that it's cultural/nurture. So why people feel the need to stereotype children when there's no underlying basis for a division is beyond me, it just limits them. The world is tough enough without cutting the options in half.

How would my imaginary daughter be obsessed with my heels and handbags when I don't actually have lots of handbags or heels? My imaginary daughter also wouldn't have lots of accessories because I wouldn't buy her them because it's not something I am interested in.

I must be doing being a woman wrong because I'm not at all girly or interested in being girly myself.

She'll strike a sexy pose is just fucking depressing.

I'm doing woman all wrong too. I couldn't strike a sexy pose for all the gold in the world.

Maybe post a link to Delusions of Gender in answer to the post?

I am fairly sure I was a boy when I was younger, well according to that list.
I have 3 girls and one boy and I can see bits of them on each list because they are different people not just whatever gender they happen to be.

Hey! Enough with the mother of boys sniping! I only have boys and even so I'm about the list, I do care about girls being made to wear skirts as uniform.

I'm capable of noticing gender stereotyping even though I only have one gender example in front of me just as well as people with both because my two boys are both totally different to each other, totally different to their cousins and friends, and generally just themselves not 'generic boy' - is that not the point of what we're saying?

My God - I've just discovered I'm a man based on those lists - except for the penis bit……

Not only that both my daughters are men too.

Among the three of us we kept A and E in business.

She'll strike a sexy pose.

Of course, children imitate adults. Adult women are shown in those poses in media all the damn time. The author acts like this is something suprising and innate, though.

I only have DSs and various bits of various lists are true at various point in time.

My imaginary daughter would be stuffed - no high heels, no make-up, definitely no sexy pose, barely own a hairbrush, no handbag, and don't buy things we don't need (small house no storage).