my niece made a point...

[JokersGiggle]

she's very intellectual but views things in a very black and white way.
She has strong feminist views like me (her mum doesn't care much ). In conversation she threw in FGM (as you do!) And in her opinion having a bikini wax done is a mild form of FGM.
Just throwing it out there for consideration. It really made me think.

Dss school dis an african week last year. Maybe I should ask him

Going pee pee
Are they the actual words that were used

she calls it going for a pee pee. Assuming her teacher didn't call it a pee pee.

Gawd

There was an advert for a charity on the train today which DD1 (6) asked about - she read it as the charity had the name something for girls and it had "FGM - Female Genital Mutilation" and she asked what it was so I tried to explain in an age appropriate manner and then the 4yo wanted to know what I was telling her sister about so I ended up having to try and explain it in an age appropriate manner and answer their questions (why????) in the middle of the sodding train! I nudged dozing DH at one point with a raised eyebrow and asked him if he wanted to get involved in teh conversation but his feeling was he was happy for me to handle it and closed his eyes again....

Anyway so now my kids who are younger than 7 have a rough idea so it's not beyond the realms of possibility that a child that age would know.

Also I guess a child that age might know about waxing if her mum does it.

Anyway.

For a 7yo that is quite advanced thinking (blimey) however clearly while women have lots of societal pressure to do things or have things done to them, the horror of FGM and the risks and permanent damage and so on are extreme and can in no way be compared to waxing.

There are most likely classmates of hers who are at risk of this, and it thrives on secrecy and shame, so certainly they should all find age-appropriate ways to talk about it.

I do think it's weird that it was featured as part of "Africa Week" though. Though that's another thread.

I find it hard to believe that a school has asked 7yo to police each other for suspicion of impending / already happened FGM.

I do too. Good thing no one's mentioned that here.

OP has hasn't said that hasn't she

Sounds like a bright girl.

It's quite impressive for a 7 year old to be able to make connections.

You might argue with the substance of it, but it's great that she's able to join up dots.

Wow. We had an African theme recently, also y2. There was absolutely no mention of FGM by anyone - and we are in an area which has been highlighted with a high risk of FGM among young girls. We have had lots of advice re watching for signs etx but no advice to actual teach about it in the infant school. I'm. I'm surprised. Many if our y2s would not be ready for that level of conversion in class tbh.

Fwiw I don't think FGM and bikini waxing are in any way alike.

Poor child. She shouldn't know about things like that at her age.

And I feel sorry for her mum having an aunt like you around. If you want a mini me have your own child

Everyone done hoiking up their judgey pants?

OP, it's a good job you didn't try posting this question in AIBU.

For the record, your niece sounds impressive, the topic sounds like it was covered in an age-appropriate way for 7 year olds, and her inference sounds reasonable on the basis of the age-appropriate facts she was given. Not so convincing for adult women who have the full facts but yes... an interesting point.

I don't have a problem with the concept of FGM being gently introduced to 7 year olds. It sounds like it was framed as a children's rights issue if it was alongside that of boys' tribal tattoos, and the issue of rights for children is indeed a sensible and suitable thing to get kids of that age thinking and talking about.

Everyone done hoiking up their judgey pants?

Yeah you're new around here aren't you?

youmakemehappy without me my sister would be on benefits and alone.
I got an education and a good job. My sister had a child when she was 17. She was kicked out by our father and dn Dad doesn't give a shit.
Who pays her rent? Me.
Who gives her money for food and extras (gym membership, nice clothes, holidays, nice safe car ect) ? Me.
Who pays all her bills? Me.
Who pays dn school fees? Me.
Who pays for dn hobbies - ballet, tennis, riding lessons and flute lessons? Me.
Who is paying for my sister to go to uni in sept? Me.
Who is going to pay for after school care for dn so she can go to uni? Me.
Who has dn over night every other Friday after school - Sunday afternoon? Me.
Who got the dog for them, insured it? Me.
So yes I am a large part of her life.

And FYI I've had 5 MC in the last few years ranging from 6Weeks to almost 15 Weeks, and MC number 5 was twins. So having one of my own isn't working out so well. Thanks for enquiring.

Who pays her rent? Me.
...
Who got the dog for them, insured it? Me.

But who's counting?

Im not I want to point out the reasons i'm a large part of their lives.
She's my SISTER. Id do anything for her. If the roles were reversed she would do the same.

And wouldn't you keep a vague track if you had £4000 - £5000 going from your bank account each month to another person?

Your poor sister. All you've sacrificed is cash, she is sacrificing her daughter. I'd hate to be in her position, and think you are really taking advantage for your own reasons.

You clearly look down upon her abilities as a mother and think you would do a much better job, hence the sad face in your OP. What so her mum doesn't teach her decent feminist values? They would be better off without you IMO, you are inflicting your own views on her daughter and mum can't stop you as she is beholden to you.

Good luck ttc

They would be better off without you IMO - that's a bit harsh!

She wanted to be a stay at home mum, I made it so she could be that and live comfortably rather than off the state in a council house.
she wanted time without dn so she could go out, I made that happen for her.
She wanted dn in a good school, I made it possible.
Don't anyone dare question our relationship. Our love is unconditional. Since dn we have become closer than ever.
Question my intelligence, question my ability to do my job, question anything you like but NEVER question the lengths I will go to for my lil sister.

Youmakemehappy do you need to be so horrible? OP is clearly a lifeline for.her sister and DN, not that you've in any way been invite to comment on that, this thread is about the equation the 7yr old niece made between bikini waxing and FGM

"Sacrifying her daughter" ODFOD

She is a great mother. I KNOW she can't make the amount of money needed to keep her and dn at the standard they like. Hence going back to uni.
She's the mum and im the bread winner.
We don't see it any different than separated parents.
I take care of money and every other weekend and she can call me anytime. She is the loving mother.