The Feminist Pub - come in and chat.

[LRDtheFeministDragon]

This is something like the fourth pub chat thread - please pull up a chair at the bar. Everyone welcome.

Old thread is here: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/1920422-The-Feminist-Pub-continued?

But it's pretty much full so welcome in.

Oh, i love labs. I'm sorry, didn't mean to make you sad. But it's clear he's got a good home.

Cross post - now don't you dare apologize for that!

DH said he's had the best years of his life with us - he was a rescue dog.

Thanks love - you made me sad-happy, iykwim x

Well, I'd send you a hug to break all sorts of other MN rules.

I think there's a lot in the way we feel about animals that reflects the way we act about people - they matter.

Take care of yourself and of dog. x

So true. I'm always so suspicious of anyone who isn't kind to animals.

Oh, fuck MN 'rules' {fierce hug}

So sad when a much- and long-loved dog is seriously ill/old and you even have to think about the worst. Sorry to find yourself in that position, Sabrina.
I have unfulfilled dog-needs, but remembering what it feels like to lose a dog is one of the (many) things, that puts me off just now.

I just read last night's discussion about how straightforward requests might be perceived and I agree there's a huge amount of conditioning going on whether somebody just hears what's actually been said or some kind of subtext. Which may or may not be there... That is part of the struggle I have with communicating meaningfully with DH as he sees anything that I hold a different opinion on as 'attack' or criticism of his position. I'd hold that against him a lot more than I do (and I do !) if I did not know his family, actually his mother, who have the worst and most dysfunctional communication style.
I did not fully see that when I married him. Hm.

Sorry to hear about your dog Sabrina. I have never owned anything bigger than a goldfish, so I've never had to experience this type of worry and sadness, but if if he was a rescue dog it sounds like you made a big difference to his life. I hope the drugs can control his condition. x

Sabrina - hope the drugs work for your lovely dog x

Thanks for all the good wishes. You're all so lovely

just a quick update - then I'll stop banging on about him he's has food and his medicine this morning, which is v good news. Took him for a gentle walk, and he seems quite happy & comfortable. Fingers crossed

Hello Pub!

I'm half way through Ursula Le Guin's Lavinia. It's good. But it has no chapters! I can't stop!

Glad dog is comfortable, sabrina.

upto - books without chapters are my pet hate. Lovely when you are a child; not otherwise.

I need a large virtual pint. I spent this afternoon hearing how an eight year old girl thinks she is fundamentally less capable than boys. Lucky her mum and dad are furious, but still.

Oh, I read Lavinia recently. It is nice, though a bit 'this happened and then that happened', if you know what I mean. Didn't quite have a core to the book. But some lovely imagery and of course her writing is always fabulous.

for the eight-year-old girl. Where did that happen?

Bought the first Warshawski, only £1.49 on kindle, it's called Indemnity Only.

Sorry to hear about your dog Sabrina :( Hope the drugs are helping.

Out of DH and I, I'm probably the more defensive of us. I try not to be though, and have got a lot better recently :) Hope I wouldn't get defensive over a badly cleaned pan. DH has an annoying habit of lecturing me about stuff I already know. It's not badly intended, he likes to talk to me as a way of organising his thoughts whereas I think things through then talk. I guess all couples have their own issues with communication that start to come out after you've known each other a while.

Though, actually, I've often found that people take great pains to explain very carefully stuff that I already know. Always put it down to being smarter than most and understanding quickly (sorry, that sounds boastful! ) but recently I wonder whether smart men have to put up with it?

Having a good feminist week here, went to a talk today about technology that was almost 1/3 women But about the 8yo who thinks she's not as good as the boys.

at not as good as the boys.

I'm not having a good start for the day. It started OK as we built huts and things for our village, and then I'm stupid enough to go and look at my work email. Exactly how many times do you have to say one thing? > AAARRRGGGHHH!!!!!

School run. At least that's straightforward.

I'm fine buffy. It's just some students who don't seem to have the focus and stamina you expect of them.

Doctrine I've not read the first Warshawski book.

I like Lavinia so far - it's a funny premise, to have a poet write something and then encounter one of the characters and discover just how inadequate he was. It's clever. I like clever stuff. And a woman's perspective on all this hero stuff is fun too.

so sick of misogyny. why do men hate us so such?? even a so called male 'friend' makes me want to puke with his ideas. leching at women does not mean men like or admire us! they disrespect and hate us...leching keeps us in our place and is used to control us. not all men, i hasten to add. but too many just have no regard for us as equal human beings.

I just wanted to say I would love to join this pub chat of that's ok?

I'm mid putting the DCs to bed but I'll read the thread and if I could have abottle of prosecco that'd be grand.

Welcome in.

Prosecco coming right up.

In a funny way I've felt quite warm and fuzzy about feminism this afternoon.

Me too LRD

I'm not even drunk yet but I could tell you all I love you and get bit teary.

Welcome Sauce - can I join you in a prosecco? Cheers

I did at that other thread - probably shouldn't have. I always think it's funny when a woman says 'Oh, all my friends are men, women are too bitchy' ? Or was it uptight?

I don't find women, in general, any more bitchy or uptight than men. Perhaps it the company I keep and the fact that I'm a card-carrying member of the sisterhood.

Exactly Sabrina - I don't get it. Not bitchy at all, always funny and clever I've found.

I'm not drunk yet but I probably need to. Supervising music practice always make me think I should be. Actually maybe that's the key to it... Hmm. Will consider the option.

And I love you all too. Women are not bitchy. If they are I'll still take their company over being condescended upon, or over the company of misogynists dressed in devil's advocates' clothing. What do devil's advocates wear, come to think of it?