Can I ask you for some links about porn please?

[EhricLovesTeamQhuay]

Specifically accounts of ex porn actors talking about abuse/coercion in porn films, and anything academic about the effects of porn on male sexuality and sexual attitudes?

I've read bits, but I'm already convinced. This is for a friend whose new boyfriend doesn't get it and she feels like she doesn't have the evidence to show him.
Thanks

Thanks for the explanation SGB, thanks for taking the time.

I am not convinced really that the pro sex industry position is the best way of improving things for women. I guess the landscape has changed in the last 20 years, the advent of internet pornography, the ubiquity and scale of it and the pornification of society have shifted the goalposts in a major way, imo.

As to my 'financial interest' in porn, quite frankly evidence would suggest that I personally would make a great deal more money if I changed sides and started touting an anti-porn position.

But I don't want to, and would consider it to be unethcial to do so.

really?

when does the paycheck arrive? I'm missing a trick it seems

I want to pitch in in defence of SGB here, though I disagree with her views (I personally think porn and prostitution are inherently harmful). But there is a huge difference between making (what I would guess) is an extremely modest amount of money from writing erotica and being a paid shill/astroturfer working on behalf of the porn industry, which I think is what is being suggested here. (Though I agree with sinister - I can't see how being anti-porn is the key to a healthy income).

Solid, are you saying that you would make more money by being anti-porn than working in the sex industry or writing erotica...? How?!

How can you make money from being anti-porn? I really can't think of a way

Oh yuk I missed the pearl necklace remark, was just switching off and going to bed at that point. Fucking creepy, no doubt about it, what a skanky thing to post.

He tries to act innocent too, how silly. Yoni liked your post from yesterday Basil

Yep, that faux innocence that creepy men do.

Blee.

Men: when you are creepy and then pretend you haven't been, women are on to you.

We are not fucking stupid, even really stupid women recognise creepiness because it is simply so ubiquitous, which is why the only women it generally works on are those who are too young to have learned the modus operandi of creeps. Anyone over 25 has sussed it out and thinks you're a nob.

HTH.

His previous comment was "You didn't start wearing the necklace because you started watching hardcore porn did you?"

The faux innocence and "oo-er missus, you've got a dirty mind" response. Yawn. Like Basil says, heard it a hundred times.

curlew
However. If we have a society where pornography is accepted, we have a society where young men and women are internalizing the view that women are huge boobed, hairless and sexually available at all times, and where men are uncontrollably tumescent and not to be denied. Which I don't think is good for anyone.

not wanting to state the obvious but porn and real life sex are totally different things and I think most person are able separate fantasy from reality. If they don't then i think there is an education issue that needs to be addressed.

Also why this massive assumption that all women in porn are hairless and big boobed? Is this another thing written in Gail Dines book? The two porn star interviews i posted up thread certainly don't fit this description for starters.

Buffy are unwilling to challenge things like mainstream porn based upon the idea of at best men humiliating and at worst being violent towards women?

In a similar way i think you are being disingenuous to try and claim violent/ humiliating porn is 'mainstream' I would be interested to know how you reach this conclusion? Again isn't this another thing that Gail Dines lies about?

Why has lib changed his NN to AngryFrank? Banned again John?

please could the anti-porn lobby stop going into personal attacks. The debate is really interesting until that happens.

everyone has a vested interest in one side of the argument or the other whether it is financial or simply validating strongly held opinions

eg

statement men who use porn more likely to have sti's

challenged

I'm still waiting to understand why. the explanation even anecdotal was never given

yes indeed that's the issue here

no the issues of interest to me that have featured on this thread

1. does porn contribute to the widescale degradation of women or violence towards woman

2. are men likely to replicate porn acts in real life

3. is damaging porn really the popular porn?

My concern about porn is

1. What it teaches young boys and girls about what a sexual relationship is supposed to be like. They get a warped idea.

1. About the actual women in porn who are paid to accept painful and/or humiliating sex acts. They are real people too.

that too. but that assumes that their only/main point of reference is hardcore porn and that they expect to replicate this.

To me this all ties into teaching our children the importance of the word no...

When I was at school, 17/18 year olds were not having anal sex. Now it is very common. Shaving your public hair was almost unheard of. Now it is common. Cumming on your girlfriend's face would have been thought very wierd. Now it is a common desire from boys.

This is because of porn. Porn is changing how boys and girls view sex. And not in a good way.

why wouldn't it be a major source?
It's ubitiquos (argh spelling)
Kids are curious
There is a very strong 'reward' response

It would be more unusual if kids didn't get drawn and drawn and drawn again. After all, adults can't always deal with it, as we know.

you may have seen 2/20/200 clips before your first snog. So, nervous, sweaty, overwhelmed yet wanting to appear knowledgable, what do kids draw on? What bank of memories do they bring in to their first fumble? It's utterly depressing.

the anal sex thing - going back a few generations oral sex was considered taboo. again is a problem if you like it? do you like it because of porn? is it actually degrading between consenting adults? I'm not sure the increase in a sexual practice can necessarily be seen as damaging or inherently problematic.

The biggest problem with porn you actually seem to see (certainly over and over on these boards) is that men who are watching porn seem less likely to engage on any real life sex let alone a wider variety of sexual activities.

the concept of censorship is problematic to me. it seems rather like the hard drugs argument. undoubtedly hard drugs does damage but many people involved in the war against drugs are for decriminalisation but better regulation. I wonder if that has some merit in the argument here

Well I wouldn't favour decriminalisation of hard drugs either.

"I'm not sure the increase in a sexual practice can necessarily be seen as damaging or inherently problematic."

It depends on the practice and if the practices are what is presented in porn, those are massively problematic.