The Feminist Pub is Open - Chat, Rant, or pull up a chair here!

[LRDtheFeministDragon]

This thread started when we all decided to imagine what the perfect local for feminists would be like. So far, it has taps with plenty of good real ale, and some decent non-alcoholic alternatives too. There are comfy chairs and there's a feminist film night, as well as lots of nice feminist-friendly books on the shelves and space to curl up and read. The open-mic nights are attracting feminist singers and comedians, and we're just sorting out the feminist creche.

Please come along, draw up a stool, and have a good chat about whatever you fancy - as serious or as trivial as you like.

For starters, I have a half-pint of lemonade. What can I get anyone?

even

Just popping by to say hi. Off to do bath and bed and will try and get back later.

I'd like an enormous virtual glass of red and a plate of assorted delicious tapas please.

Hot Toddies are lovely.

No I didn't read the article. But if she is in control of her image, she is seriously deluded. She is very talented and does not have to go down this route.

Those photos of her simulating sex with a beer can made me feel so sad.

I honestly believe she is incredibly naive if she believes that this is 'being in control'. Regardless of feminist issues, it takes a very particular type of performer (e.g. Madonna) to pull off this type of behaviour and maintain career longevity. So even leaving aside all the issues with her behaviour, and (in many ways more importantly given their industry power) those around her, surely it should be obvious to her that it is career limiting?

I just had a nice little whiskey. After baking some mini pumpkin pies and some meringues (to use up leftover egg whites.) Am going to sit here a bit in a whiskey induced haze and not listen to kids being an absolute menace with DH upstairs ... They are always a menace this time of the day. I wish we could do bedtime things when they are not tired...

I'm a bit out of touch with this Miley Cyrus thing. All I know is what I've read on here. Can't do all this "young people music". V. tedious. >

I suspect at 20 she's still under the impression that she is invincible and will live forever young...

I am not sure whether I am incredibly repressed but I could not even get up to her antics in the privacy of my own bedroom .

And I didn't know who her father was either .

Not repressed pacific. That is a slur thrown at any woman who objects to anything sexually.

At an incredibly surface level, what is with all that tongue sticking out. So bloody far it looks like it hurts. Is it meant to be signifying something sexual, because I just don't get it.

I wouldn't want to get up to what she gets up to in the privacy of my own home. I mean:

-Humping a strange man in a really uncomfortable looking bikini whilst he is fully clothed;

• Simulating sex/masturbation with a beer can;
• Simulating masturbation with an enormous foam hand and any number of other props;
• Posing lolita style

Does any of that look sexually enjoyable for her? Lots of people have talked about Madonna in the context of Miley, but at least the things she got up to you got the impression she might actually get off on. The Sex book was very explicit, but it was also about her pleasure (from what i remember).

Love this

What she is doing is a sexual performance for men. It is not supposed to be enjoyable for her.

Sorry, I should've put 'repressed' in '' - I know I'm not, whatever it means or whatever connotations it has.

Apparently she is living the life she shows in her vids .

I am still struggling to really express what bothers me so much about many overtly sexual performances (in no way do I mean to pick on Miley. she made the v valid point that nobody went on about the guy she twerked against at the VMA awards. The grinding he did against her tweaking backside was just as yeuch, but the press was not outraged about it).

I am perfectly happy to have naked toddlers in my garden, my own kids and friends'. I was delighted on holiday at Lake Constance in Germany that nobody bat an eyelid to my 5 year old DS3 getting bored of his trunks and wandering around in the buff, perfectly innocently.
At the same time I think it is right that 10 year old DS1 prefers to be on his own in the bathroom (not that he always has the choice, poor guy).
I do not object to people expressing their sexuality in whatever way they are comfortable and happy with.
BUT - does it have to be quite so in my face?? I mean literally, there's no escaping.

I blame Micheal Jackson and all his crotch grabbing

Yes, exactly! Sorry, I was just responding to Pacific saying she wouldn't get up to that in own room and so maybe was repressed. My point was that it would be utterly illogical for any woman to behave that way in private. It's not private stuff. As you say, it is supposed to be sexual theatre.

Robin Thicke - that's the one!

Excellent link - thanks Lady15

I'll have some Stongbow tonight, btw. Thanks.

I visit Youtube a lot and so do most older children and teenagers I think. Too often the "Most popular" vids on the start page are things like Cyrus videos and other vids full of female porno-inspired objectification.
It's there, unavoidable in your face and I only don't click because I know what it is and do not approve.
But the kids are of course watching. And learning.

'These women seem to think that a man's attitude in one area of his life, has no impact in other area of his life.'

Quoting this to remind me how well it's put.

I can't add anything that doens't involve being very angry and sad, so I shall just busy myself serving up assorted tapas, red wine, strongbow, etc. etc.

Thanks, LRD

It worries me that my boys first introduction to sex with another person may well be via vile porn - not the kind of magazines that I remember some boys in my class bringing to school, but degrading, violent, airbrushed, plasticky abuse of another human being.
I really hope what we teach them at home about respecting themselves, each other and others will counteract this at least to some extent.

I am fine about nudity. But that is very different to sexual performance. Sexual performance is meant to be watched and turn people on. Its purpose is to make you an active watcher.

Non sexual nudity is usually not about performance. It is just people not wearing clothes.

Yes, I can imagine pacific. It's horrible. And unfair on them.

grennie - totally agree.

Do we have a jukebox?

We can do.

Just thinking I might put some music on. Just to get that Robin thicke nonsense out of my head. And I'm quietly listening to the chat in here. I have a daughter and two sons. So scared of getting this wrong. I had a pretty warped view of my sexuality for various reasons.

Nice lyrics.

I'm bouncing into the feminist pub and grabbing a stool at the bar.

Because, in the feminist pub, I don't need to worry that the bar will be the exclusive territory of men who look at me funny, or that it's somehow considered rude for women to sit there.

shrinking, you ok? You won't get this 'wrong', I am sure. Surely knowing there is something to be concerned about is 99% of the battle?

Afternoon LRD. I am just beginning to recognise some names on some of the other boards. And there are a few posters now when they leave shocking comments, I think, yes I would expect that from you.