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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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The invisible men project

999 replies

ArmyOfPenguins · 06/05/2013 22:45

I think it's important that the buyers' choices in prostitution are highlighted and shared. This project was linked to on FB. Thoughts? I think it's a great idea.

the-invisible-men.tumblr.com/

OP posts:
yodadoctor · 18/05/2013 01:51

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yodadoctor · 18/05/2013 01:56

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yodadoctor · 18/05/2013 02:01

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Darkesteyes · 18/05/2013 02:07

arsenal i took exception to your insinuation that women go into prostitution because they are lazy and afraid of hard work.
And you calling it the easy way out speaks volumes.

yodadoctor · 18/05/2013 02:10

Women in sex work can earn on average £150 an hour.

How does that compare to flipping burgers in mcdonalds?

Just a thought but could the high wage attract them?

FloraFox · 18/05/2013 04:52

Doctorine and Lion Then how can we trust women to run society if they are capable of making wrong decision. sorry if you cant understand what I meant by that.

I suspect it's disbelief rather than misunderstanding. Perhaps trying to give you the benefit of the doubt that you did not just make such an astoundingly moronic statement. But here you are, confirming that you did.

WhentheRed · 18/05/2013 06:53

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TheDoctrineOfSnatch · 18/05/2013 07:19

Thanks for clarifying for arsenal, Flora.

KatyDid02 · 18/05/2013 07:25

It was horrible reading, I agree. However I'm not surprised; it's fairly consistent with my experiences of men.

Catlike · 18/05/2013 08:35

Quite from one of yodadoctor's posts: Great sex, OWO, CIM, DFK, cuddles and great conversation

OWO = blow job without condom
CIM = in mouth
DFK = deep french kissing

Eurgh. Having to do all of that plus 'cuddling' with punters is fucking horrible no matter how much money you're getting. I think the 'deep french kissing' is the worst bit, believe it or not.

I used to have to get drunk, borderline hammered, before doing that as it was so hard to fake enjoyment otherwise. And faking of enjoyment was absolutely crucial as every punter was a potential online reviewer...

Sorry, pointless post!

Bunnylion · 18/05/2013 11:05

The whole point of the blog is to question the "punters", not the women.

A few people on here, who don't see a problem with prostitution, keep trying put the responsibility back on the women. There is no way anyone could know the entire life story and events that led up to a woman opening a hotel room door to, or getting in the car of, a punter. So there is no way anyone can make presumptions that she is doing it willingly, is mentally sound, has any job satisfaction or that her punters are normal, respectable gentlemen who treat her like a queen. Lets accept all of that as an unknown, and stop basing any argument on her situation on any preconceived presumptions.

What we do know is that there are men who will buy the use of a human body for their own sexual gratification. And there are also men who will review these human bodies online after they have finished with her. Prostitution is not a mutual and equal sex act as it puts the woman in a subordinate position, reducing her to a mere instrument of sexual pleasure for the punter.

This entire process is dehumanising. Not only for the women involved but for the rest of society. It adds to a culture of women being in a position of subordination and implied sexual availability to and judgement of, all men. And so it not only potentially harms the woman directly involved, but also other women within this society who are regularly groped, abused, cat-called, stalked and worse. And these women are your friends, colleagues, mothers, neighbours, sisters, daughters.

A man who is willing to be involved with prostitution is a passive exploiter who either doesn't understand or chooses to ignore the damage of his own incredibly selfish actions.

Sunnywithshowers · 18/05/2013 12:04

Very well put Bunnylion

BigBlockSingsong · 18/05/2013 13:02

I've read a few not all and there seems to be one that sticks out to be particularly bad 'fake pain' Angry

but some are actually less bad than I expected in terms of not calling them dirty useless whores or something to that effect. There complaints are more politely worded than I expected tbh.

That one about the drunk pros. was interesting is I'm wonderinf if he's okay.

BigBlockSingsong · 18/05/2013 13:03

I've read a few not all and there seems to be one that sticks out to be particularly bad 'fake pain' Angry

but some are actually less bad than I expected in terms of not calling them dirty useless whores or something to that effect. There complaints are more politely worded than I expected tbh.
Not that its important but it stood out to me.
That one about the drunk pros. was interesting is I'm wondering if she's okay.

WhentheRed · 18/05/2013 15:35

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arsenaltilidie · 18/05/2013 15:52

flora let me explain to you.
When a child commits a crime, why are they not arrested and are often treated as a victims (ie blameless), because most of the times they dont really know what they are doing.

Saying to a woman that has made her own choice is a victim is patronising to women. Because it paints a picture of women don't really know what they are doing. Then how can I trust someone to run society if I think they dont know what they are doing.

I dont paint anyone with the same brush on the basis of their sex.
There are women I respect for their hard work, they are women I dont respect. There are men I respect for their hard work, there are men I dont respect.

arsenaltilidie · 18/05/2013 15:54

Both the prostitutes and the punters don't really care about it each other.
As long as money is involved.

Bunnylion · 18/05/2013 16:23

arsenaltilidie you appear to have an agenda and are also going off on a tangent.

If you'd like to start a new discussion elsewhere, with a well thought out and clear argument - then do feel free.

yodadoctor1 · 18/05/2013 16:41

I have seen dozens of escorts and will continue to do so, even after reading all your posts.

Not one of them (or myself) has been drunk or on drugs.

They all speak perfect English.

I'm single so I'm not cheating.

I have excellent hygiene, give payment upfront to begin with and would never ask for a refund.

What's the problem?

yodadoctor1 · 18/05/2013 16:43

And if I did suspect one of them was trafficked I wouldn't have sex with her, but I would tip off the police.

As Brooke says in this video, tip-offs from punters are actually the best source of info on sex trafficking.

yodadoctor1 · 18/05/2013 16:45

And like I said before, I am not buying a "body" I am buying a "service".

Bunnylion · 18/05/2013 16:48

yoda congratulations on your "excellent hygiene", your mum must be very proud of you.

yodadoctor1 · 18/05/2013 16:49

Care to answer the Q I asked.

What's the problem?

yodadoctor1 · 18/05/2013 16:52

I know most feminists get their knowledge on sex work from feminist writers on tabloids. You probably think it is all smelly old men in trenchcoats who visit women high on heroin. So I'm telling you how it is from my experience from seeing dozens of escorts.

Also I'm not an old man. I'm in my mid-20s.

Bunnylion · 18/05/2013 16:53

At 11.05 today I clearly answered that very question. My closing paragraph applies to you.

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