The invisible men project

[ArmyOfPenguins]

I think it's important that the buyers' choices in prostitution are highlighted and shared. This project was linked to on FB. Thoughts? I think it's a great idea.

the-invisible-men.tumblr.com/

On football days, we go into the pub at around 1 pm. Sometimes the conversation 'my misses doesn't question me the time i come back, I do as a please, etc'
Come 6pm, the same are panicking they havent told their misses what time they are coming back. Most of them are running back home scared shitless how their partners will react. Sometimes its funny when you see these guys especially with the way they were portraying themselves earlier.

My point Anyfucker is MOST of these guys most likely shy away in person.

Arse, is it possible for men to change their (sub)culture so as not to be taken the piss out of for being mature, humane and responsible?

And perhaps drop the 'my misses' crap.

mrs

A lot people do the same thing, how many times do you read 'if it was me I'd ltb' but when it actually comes to it its a different story.

Men from a young age are taught to be 'men' ie. dont show your weakness or my favourite 'man-up.'
We probably going too much off topic.

Nobody on this thread has condemned sex workers, depositer, though I agree that some people do in life.

Just because there are a few bad apples doesn't mean the entire orchard is rotten.

The whole of the sex industry is rotten, making women into paid sex toys for men to do as they please to. As in punter 18 - a man who clearly thinks he is entitled to force a woman into a second round of sex, against her will. He's not a 'rotten apple' in an otherwise fresh barrel. The whole sex industry is the rotten barrel.

Simply, the rating of women on punternet like prize cattle is what is wrong and deeply misogynistic.

Punter 18, however, goes one step further and describes a criminal act.

Just awful . Certainly not Pretty Woman .Those poor women .

A lot on this thread just doesn't make sense to me.

How can you harp on and on about prostitutes not being victims, but state that if your own daughter became one, you would have failed her in some way? arsenal

have all prostitutes been failed in some way then?
Wouldn't that suggest they are in fact victims?

(using your logic)

And if it is the easy way out, why are we all not doing it?

Why are we all slogging our guts out working 40+ hours a week, when we can just let strangers fuck us for easier money

I think that you can't know who is willing, who is co-erced, who was sexual abused etc.

But what you do know is that the choice to prostitute yourself and the choice not too is based on some internal thought process.

I know i wouldn't choose it because i believe myself to be worth more than letting men use me or use my body for a service for money.

I won't presume the prostitutes have no self worth, but i can't think of another reason why someone would choose this path out of pure choice. (if there was better alternatives i mean)

If I was a man, I couldn't think of anything worse than having sex with someone who would probably rather be anywhere else in the world than right there in that moment and was only doing it for the money. It is so skin crawling.

Im neither pro nor anti drugs..
Do you believe drug dealers are victims??
Do you believe drug takers are abusing their dealers??
If there was a forum that reviews drug dealers, they'd probably write the same?

Yes its its not nice comparing sex to drugs but essentially BOTH parties are treating sex as a commodity, you can BUY or SELL sex.

Disregard those that go to university.
Why are most teens, early 20s working, doing apprentices when they could easily earn £600-700 per week selling drugs.
Do most drug dealers work under duress? probably not.
Why do most drug dealers go back to selling drugs even when arrested? easy money.

Do you honestly think drug dealers are victims?
Why don't you think they are victims?
They probably came from a 'similar' background.

My answer is they are not victims, they chose to do it because they feel they can earn more money selling drugs than working.
Saying they are victims because drug buyers

I won't presume the prostitutes have no self worth, but i can't think of another reason why someone would choose this path out of pure choice. (if there was better alternatives i mean)
Thats the question, better alternative? Similar things are said by people that refuse to work.

If I was a man, I couldn't think of anything worse than having sex with someone who would probably rather be anywhere else in the world than right there in that moment and was only doing it for the money. It is so skin crawling.
That's how most men think. Do I think those that visit prostitutes are victims of their upbringing, absolutely not.

Far too many points here for me to reply to succintly, but whilst this thread may be anti punter, it has also the jist of being anti prostitute. Comments such as "poor women", only serve to confirm our supposed victim status.

"I won't presume the prostitutes have no self worth, but i can't think of another reason why someone would choose this path out of pure choice.".....whoever wrote that - do you realise how patronising that sounds to women who HAVE made a free choice?

I won't say that no abuse exists, but I encountered very little in my time...I'd go as far to say far less than seems to happen in so called normal relationships judging by some other threads on here.

Has anyone given consideration that some men who write these reports are embroidering the truth to bolster their online persona?

Or that whoever is behind this so called 'project' is being explotative in getting cheap publicity off OUR backs. Do you not see the hypocrisy?
Or would you rather close your ears and minds to the views of a whore?

Minnehaha this is an anonymous forum so no-one can know whether you are genuine or not. As a result, you can't ask for any special consideration for your views or your posts because of who you may or not be.

And since no-one has claimed responsibility for the invisible men project, they are hardly getting cheap publicity.

minehahaha I didn't mean it patronising. Quite the opposite in fact. i think if i would have said- they must have no self worth, that would have been patronising. I was trying to say that i won't speak for prostitues but i can't personally see how any one who thought themself worthy, would choose it.

And i find it quite bemusing that you have picked up on that, whilst ignoring someone who has likened your choice to that of drug dealers and drug takers.

I'm surmising from arsenal's post that he likens the choice of all corncerned as having a poor moral direction and even a criminal mentality, seeing as he has used an analogy to compare you all.

minnehaha what you're doing here is exactly what society always does - diverting us all away from the discussion of the choices of the men who are the cause of prostitution, back to those of the women. The whole point of this project, is to divert the spotlight back where it belongs - on the choices of the men.

It is practically impossible to discuss that in RL or here, because the automatic response is to turn the spotlight away, leaving the punters to be cast as some sort of neutral element in the whole prostitution thing, while the women are endlessly discussed and scrutinised. Men don't like it when their part in the process is held up for even part of the scrutiny women's part is - they understand that as soon as we start looking at them properly, the reality of what their role is, starts to be understood and they lose their status of neutral or even benevolent force and we see them for what they are. No wonder they're so keen to ensure that any discussion gets headed off back to where they want it to be - around the actions and behaviour and motivations of the women, leaving their behaviour to go undissected just as it always is.

This thread is a vain attempt to resist that. Let's get back to discussing the men eh. Wotaboutthemenz.

This is a good project.

As many have pointed out here, analysis of the institution of prostitution tends to focus on the women. The spotlight needs to be on the men - the ones who choose to purchase sexual access of other human beings.

Men such as the ones in this study for example

When compared with the large number of studies of women in prostitution, it is apparent that men who buy women for sexual use are an under-researched group. There is a need for research that offers additional information on those who have been described as ?the invisible subjects of the sex industry?

Some comments from the men studied;

Prostitution is like masturbating without having to use your hand.?

?It?s like renting a girlfriend or wife. You get to choose like a catalogue.?

?I feel sorry for these girls but this is what I want.?

?No big deal, it?s just like getting a beer.?

?I like it if it?d be super expensive...she comes in, nothing said and she is instantly very sexual, a sexual creature.?

?My favourite experience in prostitution was when she was totally submissive.?

?I don?t like the ones that make no secret of it being a job. I like customer care. They try to finish quickly but I want to take a little bit of time.?

?I have sex as a means to an end to meet my sexual needs... It?s a financial transaction.?

?I found her on punternet.com and she looked at me with the look of a puppy dog in the Christmas window.?

?Look, men pay for women because he can have whatever and whoever he wants. Lots of men go to prostitutes so they can do things to them that real women would not put up with.

?If you go to the wrong one, you might as well be in a morgue, there?s a slab of flesh there.?

?We?re living in the age of instant coffee, instant food. This is instant sex.?

?Prostitution is a last resort to unfulfilled sexual desires. Rape would be less safe, or if you?re forced to hurt someone or if you?re so frustrated you jack off all day.?

?Prostitution is being able to do what you want without the taxation.?

?It?s no strings attached sex, no bother about buying gifts, it?s a one off financial commitment.?

?It should be legalised over here. This is the way God created us. It is being human. If you don?t have a partner then you have to go to a prostitute.?

?It?s unfulfilling, there?s no reward. It?s empty. It?s terrible. You come out feeling even more empty and unloved. You will likely feel quite empty afterwards, as if you have been used.?

?Prostitution is like being able to masturbate without doing any of the work.?

?You pay for the convenience, a bit like going to a public loo.?

?I hugely recommend it but be sure you know there?s a threshold you?ll be crossing. Prostitution is naturally questionable, whether it?s to yourself or to society.