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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

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Original poster

High Heels WTF is it about

164 replies

FattyArbuckel · 05/02/2011 17:04

Why in this day and age do we STILL worship high heels

I think they are one step away from chinese foot binding and can't look around the pavements without cringing...

Really, why do women wear them? I think they look awful.

Rant over - just could not keep it in any longer today....

OP posts:
BelleDameSansMerci · 06/02/2011 15:15

< hugs AF back >

Oblomov · 06/02/2011 15:22

Bingo, who said anything about ageing. I like being as as old as I am. comfortable in my own skin, thanks very much. And do not have a problem with ageing.
I like it when women look smart. wear a dress. have a new haircut. I compliment women who do.
I think many women look better with a tiny bit of makeup. One of my school freinds looks better without. But then she is probbaly the most naturally beautiful woman I have ever seen. Come the revolution she has to die !! We told her this and she laughed. Took it in the nice sense it was meant. Thats becasue she is beautiful in every sense of the word.

Plus all these references to heels are implying they are uncomfortable. Not everyone finds them uncomfortable, you know. I never wear uncomfortable shoes. Never have, never will.
!We are constantly paining opurselves, just to wear those shoes that we think men want us to.' Rubbish. I wear them becasue they are comfy and I feel nice.

noddyholder · 06/02/2011 15:25

I wear them because I like them and some clothes I have require them.It is nothing to do with feminist ideology My dp is not interested either way.I just love them.i also wear trainers and flat boots etc .And sometime slots of make up sometimes none.

Oblomov · 06/02/2011 15:26

Unlike Alex, I am not gorgeous. I scrub up well though. When I take a bit more time to blow dry my hair, put on a splash of make up, put on some black high heeled boots with a black knee length skirt and go to work, I feel nice.

Is that a problem ?

Oblomov · 06/02/2011 15:30

Bingo, you took thta one comment out of context. when read in amongst everything else I wrote in my post. One swipe of brown eyeshadow. I mean come on, give me a break here !!

Prolesworth · 06/02/2011 15:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

FlamingoBingo · 06/02/2011 15:33

Oblomov - sorry, I couldn't think of another way to explain why one would have to start making more of an effort once in one's thirties Confused Why do you think that, then, if not because people are getting older?

And not a problem at all if you want to do that - the problem is when other people think you ought to and you do it to please them.

FlamingoBingo · 06/02/2011 15:36

Prolesworth - it's also, I think, about criticising a culture that makes women so worried about their natural looks, that they feel they have to hide behind a mask. Of course I'm not talking about most make-up wearers (a bit of mascara and lippy) but those who really do plaster it on.

Oblomov · 06/02/2011 15:37

"Now I am older, I am more confident and don't feel the need to fit in and worry about my appearance as I did when I was younger. "
That was Alex's refernce to me saying about making more effort now I'm in my late 30's.

But the difference is that:
a) she is gorgeous.
Plus, I was happy in my 20's and didn't try and fit in or feel more comfident.
I was confident in my 20's and am equally so in my 30's.
I am nearer 40 now than 30 and feel just fine about that.

noddyholder · 06/02/2011 15:40

I think I amke the same effort I always did.It is about fashion for me anyway.definitely don't feel more feminine in them.Feeling feminine isn't about clothes and heels and make up.i often wear old jeans and t shirts and plimsolls and still feel good.

Oblomov · 06/02/2011 15:43

Bingo, becasue when you are 20, and wake up and go to 4 hours of lectures, after drinking all night , its not a problem.
When you are nearly 40, you have more shallow colured skin, etc etc ....
I give a little, (and I mean a little) more thought to my clothes and haircut than I used to. I want to feel nice. attractive. but in a very very discrret way.
I think you just need to pay more attention to these things as you get older.
I still get ready to go to work , including blow drying hair, brushing teeth and makeup in about 14 minutes though. So its not like I'm paining at this for hours and re-applying mascara at every turn !!

alexpolismum · 06/02/2011 15:48

Oblomov - we are obviously very different people. I am sure you are gorgeous. Just look in the mirror and think "Wow! That's ME! Aren't I amazing?!"

Anyway, just to clarify - my comments reflect my own experience, I do not intend to imply anything negative about anyone else.

Actually, come to think of it, I spent most of my 20s (from about 23 on) gaining in confidence. It was my younger self that wanted to fit in, I think from puberty up until that point. I too feel fine about my age. There's no point worrying about it, I think. Besides, as you say, I am indeed gorgeous! Grin

FlamingoBingo · 06/02/2011 15:51

Look, my issue was with this bit of your sentence: " I think you need to". Simply because, it is that attitude of people thinking other people need to do things that makes it hard for people to be 'different'. If you meant 'I find I need to', then that's a different matter.

AnyFucker · 06/02/2011 15:52

I don't worry about my age (not saying anyone else on here is to excess, btw)

I don't fancy the alternative, you see Smile

alexpolismum · 06/02/2011 15:52

Sorry, what do you mean by 'shallow coloured skin'? Does that mean pale?

I have a slightly dark colour to my skin (olive, really), I've never thought about skin getting lighter, but then mine hasn't so far.

AnyFucker · 06/02/2011 15:53

sallow ?

AnyFucker · 06/02/2011 15:54

my skin has gone more sallow as I am getting older

kinda pale and tired-looking

I look like death without make-up, tbh

madwomanintheattic · 06/02/2011 15:54

i wear el naturalista clogs in the summer (i have lots of different colours) and mukluks in the winter. Grin

my boss is desperate to give me a full makeover, but she knows she has no chance. at all. she hates that i refuse to congratulate her on her two hours in the gym and skin tight low cut high heeled made up daily ritual. if she wants to do that, fine. but i don't. she then takes her shoes off at work (because they hurt) but still laughs at mine. (my work shoes are black dansko clogs Grin) hey ho.

on thursday she gave me a lift home and said 'what i love about you is that you don't give a shit'. not quite the look i was going for...

needless to say, i don't do make-up either.

i'm 5'2" and dh is a foot taller. he does roll his eyes at my choice of footwear occasionally... Grin

msrisotto · 06/02/2011 15:58

The culture we live in attaches far more importance to how women look than it does to men therefore beauty ideals stuff including fashion is a feminist issue. Men don't tend to worry about the colour of their skin, they don''t get judged as person based on it either. There isn't a negative association with men getting older either that requires them to make more effort as they age or in order to look professional.

alexpolismum · 06/02/2011 16:03

AF - I look tired because I am tired. It comes with having three children and doing physio with ds2 (he has hypotonia) and carrying him everywhere. I just don't think it matters if I look tired.

AnyFucker · 06/02/2011 16:07

it doesn't matter alex, if it doesn't matter to you

I expect you have more pressing things to think about, and rightfully so

the point is, if it makes some women feel better to put make-up on, that is their choice

I feel better when I do

it's no reflection on anyone else

Oblomov · 06/02/2011 16:13

No, Alex I am definitely not gorgeous. But that is o.k. Its not a problem.

sallow ? I mean all skin ages and loses colour and vitality. Not sure if thats true if you have lovely olive skin, but english skin does. My mums skin has. She is 60 and can look lovely. She says it takes a bit more work than it did when she was in her 20's. When she was late 20's she was living in cyprus , with 3 small children,and looked tanned and naturally lovely, without a spek of anyhting.

Pictish · 06/02/2011 16:19

I don't wear heels. Ever. Nuff said.

However, I DO put on make up every day - just eyeliner, mascara and a little shadow.

Oblomov · 06/02/2011 16:22

Bingo, I do think women need to.
No woman should dress the same in their 20's as they do in their 30's, or 40's or 50's.
You don't want to be over dressed, mutton dressed as lamb. You want to look good at the age you are.
And that probably means not having peroxide blonde etc etc at 60, like you may have done wehn you are 20.
I'm generalising, but can't you get my point?
You do need to take more care as you get older.
some Girls when I was 15 were using sun in and olive oil to sunbathe.
When your 30 and 40 you need to use a good SPF and a good moisturiser, and think about what colours flatter your skin as you age.
That does require more attention, than getting up when your 15 and just going out.

Pictish · 06/02/2011 16:23

Sent too soon.

Anyway I was just going to say that actually I'm not in the least afraid of letting the world see what what I really look like, as suggested by one poster....
No - I just like to convince the world that I think enough of myself to take the time out to look nice, and take care over my appearance.

If you appear as though YOU think you're worth a little me time - everyone else will think you are too.

I am not orange, I do not have spider's legs for lashes, but yeah...I think it's nice to care how you look.

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