HEALTH: controversial feminist website Mumsnet discovers a little bit of dirt 'can' kill you.

[MmeLindt]

From the spoof Twitter account DM Reporter.

SGM was surprised to hear that we had a feminist revolution this weekend. I have informed her that Dittany has been elected Queen in her absence. Although perhaps she would prefer to be President, not sure if she is a Royalist.

SGM would like the post of Minister for Education and Popcorn.

I have put my name in the hat as Minster for Chocolate and Wine.

We also have a suggestion for Minister of Jam and Chutney Making, with responsibility for the Peanut Butter Department.

I feel we need some more Ministries. What do you suggest?

I'll shut up now....

You need a Ministry for Justice Reasonableness.
Where any one accused of Unreasonableness will face trial by a jury of their judgy pants wearing peers.

If found to be Unreasonable, they will be forced to become a Bounty hun and be sentenced to 2-4 tickers in their signature.

Sentence is doubled for Bridezillas.

I want to head up the ministry of getting things out of perspective

OR

the ministry of flat shoes, unbrushed hair and no make up.

Ministry for Moral realignment. Putting an end to eating Grapes in the Supermarket before they are paid for!!

Ahh right Rhadegunde :o I didn't think it was sinister, just thought I was being dim at not understanding the cryptic nature of your name

I want to be Ministry of Wrongness

Ministry of Getting Things into Perspective - is that not part of the Ministry for Home Truths?

AnyFuleNo - that sounds right up my street, can I be your UnderSecretary.

I think HullyGully would be perfect for the Ministry for Reasonableness.

Perhaps we could have special advisers.

Mary Portas could be Ministry of Sorting Things Out.

Gok could advise of Fashion and Support Underwear.

A craft dept?
We could make our own business cards with some decoupage

I am a bit worried that we are a bit non-feminist here.

Ministries of Soft Furnishing and Craft Ministry sounds like fun, but it is not controversial or radical.

We could do with a Minister of Engineering

Or a Minister of Offside Rule (Undersecretary of Do Me A Favour Love)

I've got a degree in Industrial design that I'm currently not using. I can sort out the Ministry of Engineering for you if you like?

WWhen I said about being minister for nails
I meant 'hard as nails' not french manicures.

Lol SFD.

We need a Minister for Feminist Education, methinks.

Actually no, scratch that, I want to be Minister for Fun. I will be in charge of cocktails and the karaoke machine :)

My sister always hoped I'd run into David Mitchell (we lived near one another), our eyes would meet and then BAM! Love at first sight.

I never bumped into him but I kept bumping into Robert Webb a lot - to the point where we were giving one another embarrassed smiles.

/unbelievably off topic

I am taking this seriously, honest

See I prefer Robert Webb, he sure can dancce

That's why my sister was keen on our eyes to meet over an aubergine at Sainsburys Local. Webb is married and has a DD (hence our embarrassed smiles - we were both dragging walking with our children in opposite directions

Ooh this sounds great. Can I be Minister for Obscene Poetry and Ranting?

THat is weird, Rhadegunde