Feminism chat thread

[ElephantsAndMiasmas]

Hello

Been saying for ages that it'd be nice to have an area for just saying hi, letting off some steam and sharing the little things that don't warrant a whole thread.

So, I'll start...

My brother made me :o:o:o last night when we were talking about some crap sexist song. And he said (in all honesty) - well this is just one of the millions of ways the patriarchy keeps itself going.

Also got the updated email from the Feminism in London conference this morning - can't wait.

Anyone else?

Just need a little rant about something that doesn't really need a thread of its own. This seems like a good place.

My ds2 has hypotonia and we are just arranging for him to see a new consultant neurologist. As a preliminary, we had an appointment with a junior member of staff, who had to ask us questions about him, fill in my medical history where relevant, check some basic reflexes and so on.

He asked my DH every question, even the ones related to me. I couldn't believe it. I started to wonder if I was invisible. As primary carer, I was best able to answer most of the questions, and in fact did provide most of the answers. Imagine this:

Rude Junior: (looking at dh) Tell me about ds2's diet
Me: Well, he tends to eat XYZ at X times of the day
Rude Junior: (looking at DH) Is that what I should write, sir?

Rude Junior: (looking at DH) Did your wife have any complications in pregnancy?
Me: No
Rude Junior: (looking at DH) Is there anything she might have forgotten?
Me: It's not that long ago, I remember it perfectly.

Rude Junior: (looking at DH) Is ds2 making any attempts to pull himself up?
Me: detailed explanation of ds2's movements
Rude Junior: (looking at DH) What was that, sir?

And so on.

DH came out and said to me "I know what you are thinking, but please don't say anything to them until after ds has seen the consultant, because I don't know where we're going to find another one."

If only we didn't need them!

Alexpol - how infuriating! Did you DH do anything? Refer them back to you or anything?

Yes, it was infuriating, especially the "Has your wife XYZ" type questions. DH kept saying "it's just as my wife says", but he didn't want to make an issue, because there isn't exactly a surplus of consultant paediatric neurologists and he's worried they might refuse to see us.

alexpolismum.

"is there anything she might have forgotten?" FFS. Presumably your husband wouldn't have thought about starting a family with a woman so dim she couldn't perceive what her going on in her own body?

if ds2 were an adult, he might be forgiven for thinking I had forgotten a few details of my pregnancy, but he's only 13 months old!

He also asked "Why did your wife choose to give birth when the baby was breach?"

As though I had any choice in the matter! I wasn't exactly consulted!

I have found out that ~I can come!!!! yeah! DH has rearranged his business trip.

Could your DH have said, 'she's right here, just ask her!'?

Alexpolismum! That is horrific behaviour! What is wrong with that junior doctor!?! Did you get his name so you can complain about him after he's moved onto another firm (he won't stay with that consultant for ever, so you'll be able to safely complain about him once he's moved on).

Posie - can come where!?

Woohoo!

I am staying at my cousin's house in Richmond and getting the tube in. She's joining us at the rally at Trafalgar Square after she finishes work. I've got the whole weekend off - we're going to have a day in London on the Sunday! I am so excited for so many reasons.

It'll only be my second night without all my children since I had DD1 7.5 years ago, and will be the longest time away from DD4 (2)

Yes MWR.....

I may have to look at staying somewhere too.

I came across this anti-feminist comment on the Guardian comments about the Dominic Raab anti-feminist article.

"the feminism you see is being organised by Westminster think-tanks; it's radical feminists that are all in the top places of these feminist organisations."

Can anyone give me any details of these powerhouses of radical feminist world-domination?

Yes, I got his name (he was wearing a nametag). If there were another specialist we could see, I wouldn't go back there, but it is a rather specific branch of medicine and there aren't many of them around.

perhaps Junior Doc should specialise in the treatment of testicular cancer, so he won't have to meet women patients! I doubt further training is going to do much, unless it's a course in normal manners and behaviour!

Vesuvia - if you find them, do let us know! I would like to join!

alexpolismum wrote - "if you find them, do let us know! I would like to join!"

I'd like to join too. Isn't it strange that anti-feminists seem to know so much about these feminist organisations, but feminists don't.

Could it be that they don't exist?

The way some people speak of feminists its like we're the sodding illuminati. The only world domination I do is when I'm playing Civilization on the computer.

The wombinati perhaps.

yes, Elephants someone wrote about womb envy, but not sure someone's written about why so many men simply refuse to believe women are so disenfranchised when all the evidence is right there.

lol at radical feminist world domination. As a general rule of thumb, the more radical you are, the less of a platform you have

Did anyone see the One Show at all last week. I don't tend to watch it but I was flicking around at 7 o'clock and it came up (I think it was Wednesday). Alexander Armstrong and Alex Jones were both dressed in men's suits for some reason (not sure why as I didn't stay on the programme). I was struck by how similar they both looked. Not in terms of facial features but in terms of visual impact, size and stature. Alex still had make-up on and had her sleeves rolled up - despite the fact that the suit looked like it fitted her. Got me thinking about how different are the sexes really and whether it was deliberate that she had her sleeves rolled up - to keep that distinction between her and the man? Just an observation really not worth starting a thread over.

Anyone see Finn Mackay and others discussing sexist remarks on BBC1 this morning? link