Mount by Jilly Cooper - SPOILERS!

[MrsCampbellBlack]

So do not read this thread if you have not read the whole book.

[CalmItKermitt]

But what about Rupert and Taggie??

Is he overcome with remorse? Does he realise she's the love of his life and treat her better? What happens with her cancer??

[KathyBeale]

Halfway through a timeline!

[AGirlCalledJohnny]

Ooooh Kathy, you spoil us!!

[Trills]

I believe there's a 16 year age gap between Rupert and Taggie - when they get married he's 35 and she's 19. I think.

Jilly did not do the maths anyway. Taggie is not a lot older than Perdita, definitely.

The Guardian review saying you can tell who the baddies are - anyone who is nasty to dogs is a baddy. Simples.

[MunchCrunch01]

seems a reasonable enough way to judge people :)

[blodynmawr]

Agree with the Jenny Colgan piece in the Guardian:
'....the fact that there isn’t much of a plot doesn’t really matter, because that’s not what Jilly is about. Jilly is about bringing joy into your life: daft, silly, boozy joy, and if you like joy, you’ll like this.'

I love Jilly Books . Yes, some of the recent ones, including Wicked! Jump! and Mount! probably could have done with some more judicious editing, but at the end of the day they are daft joyful romps! I can't wait until the Football one is published so we find out what happens next!

[KathyBeale]

My timeline is becoming a monster. Just finished Pandora. Have lots of gems to share...

[MunchCrunch01]

d'you reckon JC is planning a sequel where Taggie meets a hot footballer whilst having treatment, and has a fling with him, nicely linking up the books from her oeuvre?

[tribpot]

Looking forward to KathyBeale's timeline, this should be interesting. And the subject of a PhD thesis: the internal inconsistencies in Cooper's narrative: compare and contrast with the deliberate anachronisms of Antonia Forest (in Forest's narrative, children who age no more than 5 years have uncles killed in WW1 in the first book and are watching Star Trek towards the end of the series).

I just don't find these recent books joyful. The joy's gone out of it. And the racism is not funny.

I don't think anyone is in love with RCB, are they? (I mean on the thread, in the books everyone is besotted with him). You might fancy a shag and you might even get a crush but you'd never want to end up with him. Like Cameron Cook you would want to end up with the dashing Patrick O'Hara (and don't tell me they turned up at the party and were no longer together, likewise Caitlin and Archie).

[MuchasSmoochas]

It was like picking a scab. Couldn't help myself, had to finish it. Grey eyes, fatuous, beef Wellington, buttercunt ad nauseum. And my god the clothes! Worst bit was the Valhalla sex party.

[KathyBeale]

I am supposed to be working from home today so if any of you see my boss, can you confirm that this is Very Important Business?

This is the longest thread I've ever posted on Mumsnet and it's taken me an hour to write it!

So, starting with Riders...

It starts in 1970 when Jake (and Rupert, though we don't meet him then) are 21. Fen is 9, and Tory is 18. This makes Rupert born in 1949.

Rupe meets Helen in 1973 (they are married for 8 years, so divorce in 1981 - this is important - remember that!).

Jake and Rupert meet again in 1975 in Spain when they are both 26. So far so good.

Marcus is born in 1976, and Tabitha in 1978.

Then we run into trouble because Jilly shifts the LA Olympics from 1984 when they actually happened, to 1980. So all references to LA from then on are referring to 1980, and not 1984 - if we go with that then all the dates fit (for a while!).

In Rivals we hear that Rupert gave up showjumping two years after the Olympics - so 1982. Two years after that Tony meets Cameron in America and 20 months later - in Feb 1986 - Declan and his family move to Rutshire.

In February 1986, Patrick is 20, Taggie is 17, and Caitlin is 14. Marcus is 10 and Tabitha is 8. All good.

Then we hit some problems.

Perdita is 14 at the beginning of Polo. She was born on the 6th November 1966 (she looks at her birth certificate) which means Polo starts late 1980/early 1981. Daisy, her mum, was 17 at the 'Sidney Street Orgy' in February 1966 and Rupert was 18. Though actually, if Rupert WAS born in late 1949, he'd have only been 16.

When the story comes out about Perdita's dad being Rupert, Daisy is 37 and Perdita is 20. So it's 1986. But we're told Rupert and Taggie have been married for 17 months (they marry right at the end of 1986, I think) and that Rupert will be 40 at the end of the year - which means it should be 1989. We've lost 3ish years somewhere.

TMWMHJ starts at the beginning of 1990 when Lysander is about to turn 23 (on 25 February, fact fans). Marcus Campbell Black is 17. Rupert says he's "almost 20 years older" than Lysander.

When we meet Eddie, on the ski slope, he's "no more than three" and Rupe and Taggie have been married for six years, which means it should really be 1992.

Tabitha is doing her GCSEs in Appassionata, which makes it roughly 1994. In Score! which begins in October 1995, Tab is 19. I can't remember how many years it covers, though.

Pandora is easy because we get lots of dates. Jupiter's born in 1961, Alizerin in 1963, Jonathan on the 6th April 1971 and Sienna on 7th October 1973. Emerald is 25 in October 1998.

Wicked starts in May 2001 and when Janna starts her new job, 9/11 happens. This helpfully ages Dora as 11 in September 2001.

Phew.

So my birth timeline is as follows...

1949 Rupert and Jake
1952 Tory
1961 Fen
1961 Jupiter
1963 Alizerin
1966 Patrick O'Hara
1966 Perdita
1967 Lysander
1969 Taggie
1971 Jonathan
1972 Caitlin
1973 Sienna
1973 Emerald
1976 Marcus
1978 Tabitha
1989 Eddie
1990 Dora


PERDITA IS OLDER THAN TAGGIE! And the party at Penscombe in Mount! should actually be for Rupert's 67th birthday. Or Perdita's 50th.

I'm off for a lie down.

[AntheaBelvedon]

kathy We are not worthy

[YoureAllABunchOfBastards]

Buttercunt. Fucking Buttercunt?

Very, very disappointed in Rupert. The rotten bastard.

[MrsCampbellBlack]

Wow Kathy that is amazing!

[TheOptimisticButtercunt]

Kathy that was exceptional!

[YoureAllABunchOfBastards]

That is an amazing timeline.

I do love Jilly, and normally close my eyes to the inconsistencies, but this one is bloody hard to get through. It almost feels like two stories sandwiched badly together.

[MunchCrunch01]

that's great Kathy - so even RCB has to be de-aged for it to be plausible that he's fanciable!

[Motherwithflaws]

Kathy I think I love you!

[Motherwithflaws]

Can we have Jilly on for a web chat?

[tribpot]

making him no better than James Vereker is my quote of the week.

[TooExtraImmatureCheddar]

That's amazing! Kathy = brilliant!

Score lasts 2 ish years. I am currently re-reading it and it started in 1995 and someone just read out a 1996 date from the slide show of the badgers that proves Tristan didn't kill Rannaldini.

[myheadsamess]

I too have found my people - Kathy, so, so not worthy.
I stayed up until 2am this morning as I wanted to get it finished. In the past all JC. books are devoured and I couldn't have gone to sleep until finished but last night I was skipping paragraphs, fighting to keep my eyes open. I'm so disappointed. I feel like the "story" has been stolen somehow.
I too read the Eddie & old women bit agog - it's vile. And the Valhalla orgy was grim. Maybe I've matured and now find the idea grim but will have to reread to check! I've spent years reading riders etc again & again when I need escapism and familiarity but I'm not sure I'll pick up Mount again.

[blodynmawr]

Kathy