I have just read possibly the worst book in the world

[Mrsrobertduvall]

A Cold Season by Alison Littlewood.
Disclaimer...I bought it in Smith's on a buy one get one half price, and grabbed it as the cover looked good.
It's about a mother and son marooned in a small Lancashire village with unfriendly locals...a bit Wicker Man-ish. And of course there are witch/devil undertones.
It is utter tripe.
It is now in the charity shop for some poor sod to buy.

The Firework Maker's Daughter is good, but it is for children.

StewieGriffinsMom, very surreal I can imagine. I spent the day in tears and I don't do that. My imagined future at that point had had me somehow sitting at his feet picking up the pearls falling from his lips.

Thank goodness I'm not the only one not to get on with Kate Atkinson. I thought it was just me. I wish i could love Dickens but Bleak House just gave me a migraine. For total drivel though i really recommend The Notebook (at least it's short). The Old Man and The Sea yawn, just yawn

I think Wilbur Smith needs a good mention here - he should be taken out and shot for dissservices rendered to Eng Lit.

Does anyone remember the godawful series 'Clan of the Cave Bear'?

I also have issues with books that have been translated into English ...

Ah now see, I thought the first couple of Clan of the Cave Bear weren't too bad but after that they definitely took several turns for the worse. By the 4th book (yes I persevered) it was getting ridiculous and it got to a point where I could skip 4 or so pages at once, because the sex scenes were boring and formulaic and she could just as well have written "See page 59" [or whichever] rather than typing it all out again! I never even bothered to get the last one - was too put off.

I'd also like to add in Laurell K Hamilton at this point. I quite liked her vampire/werewolf detective series - farfetched fantasty fiction of course, but quite enjoyable. But her later "fairy" stuff - oh my God - absolute drivel.

Skip to book 4 then SGM! In my defence, I was only about 20 when I started reading them.

Ah linerunner - I wondered if you meant Ulverton. I read that years ago but I seem to remember loving it. IIRC it was a beautifully written book if not exactly fast-moving!

I am reading Skippy Dies atm. Struggling a little. Don't like anyone very much. It seems a bit of a sprawler trying to deal with loads of topical issues in one book. If it doesn't pull it's socks up soon I may have to consign it to the book sheld to gather dust.

In fact I should divorce DH just because of the Book Club type drivel he keeps buying me for christmas and birthdays. I swear he does a sweep of WH Smiths and buys all the one with recomendations by Punch and Judy with gushing reviews by newspapers book critics. And by and large they are something and nothing. Mostly nothing. And they make me cross.

Martin Amis is not a nice man. You can tell that just be reading his books.

OrmIran I am just too shallow for something like Ulverton. Other more intellectual types in my book club did like it!

Clan of the Cave Bear - I think I read a couple of them and also liked them at first but then they just got ridiculous! Wow that was a long time ago though!

Has anyone ever tried a Dorothy Dunnett book? I work with someone who is massively into her and he lent me a book but I couldn't get past the second chapter. I had no clue what was going on......

Think you need to be really clever to like her books!

Ha! That's me then listmaker I was obsessed with the Lymond books when I was about 17.

Ohh I bet there are a few Anita Brookner haters here. All her books are about very dull rich women who make a cataclysmic mistake of sorts which is really something quite minor. I must admit I love them, although I really have no idea why.

Like Glastocat, I feel I ought to hate Anita Brookner's books, but I find them quite soothing perhaps because she only seems to have one plot, about a nicely-brought up, no longer entirely young woman, who wears cashmere twinsets and can't understand why the man with whom she is silently in love prefers a mini-skirted and much younger girl. It's a very long time since I read one, though.

Shadowmancer by GP Taylor - hands down the worst book I have ever read

Yes that's it,they are soothing and her protagonists make me feel that I might be poor and dragged up but at least I'm not a complete drip. (grin)

I always assume that the middle-aged, middle class ladies being overlooked in favour of (as they see it) undeserving bimbos are Ms Brookner.

Twilight is the worst book ever.

I also remember reading some kind of dan brown/Indiana Jones type thriller. Lots of jungles and tombs and catacombs. Every "interesting" paragraph went like this:

John leaned into the open tomb...
...And out popped a monster!!!!

I hated The Red Tent.

I read this while holding my breath. Thank God nobody mentioned my first novel, Skating by Grace, as the worst they'd ever read (it is for children)! If I must offer an opinion, I'd say The Slap had something to offend everyone. The Lovely Bones was pretty unneccessary, too.

re The Children's Book - I gave up

especially after I found out that AS Byatt had to have an excel spreadsheet to keep track of the characters...

Loved digital fortress and all other dan brown books. Loved the shack. Read all the books in the earth children series (clan of the cave bear etc) and the only one that is shite is the very last one. The amount of research jean m auel does before writing each of her books is staggering. Also loved ps I love you. Horses for courses!

noooooooooo- Cloud Atlas was genius. I loved it.

Catch 22- have tried to read it 5 times and failed each time. never got out of the hospital. Having same problem with Infinite Jest- Shall I persevere oh wise mumsnetters??

Just finished the 5th book in the Game of thrones series. I have read about 9000 bloody pages and he still hasnt wrapped it up. FFS. It's like a bad relationship. I want to say "fuck you" and not buy the 6th book when it comes out, but I know I will.