Advice on how to curb compulsive overeating?

[DudeLooksLikeALady]

I'm going through a bad patch at the moment - I'm probably a bit depressed in any case and I've worked myself up into a state that I need to lose weight (I do - about 2 stone). I've gone into a binge eating episode, which is making me feel terrible.

I keep flitting about between diets and not being able to stick with any because I don't like the food (went to SW yesterday, only to come home and eat a box of cakes, ice cream, a full dinner, then ended up making myself sick -have had periods of bulimia in the past but never for protracted amounts of time).

Incidentally, at SW there were loads of people who were a lot bigger than me who talked about going mad on the biscuits saying "and not just 1 or 2, but 3 or 4 or 5"...but when I go mad I eat the whole packet - I think considering how much a eat I should be massive, and perhaps that is how I will end up.

Have even got to the stage of hiding food and eating it in secret. I wouldn't say I'm being greedy - I don't even really enjoy the food, I just feel compelled to cram it down to try to stop myself feeling bad.

Does anyone recognise this and how can I start to heal a bit?

It's not about food, is it, when it's like this? Are you having, or have you ever had, any counselling or therapy WRT to low self-esteem? Or have you had some kind of traumatic experience in the past that affected how you feel about your body? (no need to say what it was if you don't want to).
Right now dieting, with all its guilt-tripping and basic fallibility is the last thing you need. Work on what's making you unhappy first, and then either your weight will stablise at a healthy level without you really noticing, or you'll be able to work out a sensible eating and exercise plan. But right now you're heading back towards bulimia by the sound of it.

No, you're right solidgold it's not about food. Yes, I have had traumatic experiences in the past that have affected how I feel about my body, and yep, I've had therapy before. In fact in the weeks leading up to this I've been trying to work out how I could get back to therapy both financially and in terms of childcare etc.

I think I am heading back to the bulimia - it's the all or nothing syndrome.

I'm a terrible, terrible comfort eater. I also eat scary amounts of food sometimes, and am convinced that it's because I am so tall that (so far) I have go away with being only slightly overweight rather than hugely obese.

I don't know why I overeat / eat compulsively. I have had counselling in the past for various issues, and have never got to the bottom of it. I don't think I have low self esteem. I think I have just got very bad habits / associations going way back into my childhood which are extremely difficult to break.

So...I am still struggling with my food demons. But I have found exercise an excellent way to work on my weight (and depressive feelings, too, actually). I started very slowly at the beginning of Jan with walking every day for a short periopd of time and have progressed to exercising 4 times a week (gym & aerobics). My goal is to exercise for an hour a day, 6 days a week eventually. It has just changed my outlook and the way I feel about things so much. I am eating more healthily as a result, too, although I still have very strong, emotional cravings for certain foods and have had several 'lapses'. But at least, for the time being, i know that if I do demolish a whole carrot cake one day, i am going to burn off at least some of it the next day. maybe not a long term solution, but for the time being, it is better than sitting in my house all day every day eating and feleing sorry for myself.

HTH even a tiny bit x

Have you thought about hypnotherapy? I had this for compulsive eating and it helped enormously. I had a type of hypnotherapy which involves regression and figuring out what triggers your subconscious and taking control of it. I am normally very sceptical about any type of alternative medicine or treatments but I really did find this helped. The therapist said there were a number of reasons that trigger compulsion, not just low self-esteem (which I never had) but other things can trigger compulsion.

I'd like to second Jumpty on the hypnotherapy. I've had it recently and it has really helped change my attitude to food. I also had bulimia/compulsive overeating issues, for which I had counselling previously. I identified why I overate and I knew what I needed to do, but it never clicked until I had the hypnotherapy sessions. It was quite expensive (£80 a session) but well worth it. Going on a diet when you feel like you do could be counter productive. You'll find it hard to stick to, feel rubbish and probably eat more. Getting help to tackle how you feel sounds like the right way forward. I hope you can find the time and money- good luck

I cannot recommend 'overeaters anonymous' enough (OA). It is like AA but for food. It has completely changed my life and given me complete freedom from food obsession. There are meetins in quite a lot of places - where are you? Have a look at these:
www.oa.org/ (world) and www.oagb.org.uk/ (UK)

Sorry, I meant meetings - my g isn't working!
Seriously though, if it worked for me it can work for anyone. My eating disorder was really bad and I can honestly say that I have almost complete freedom from food obsession now, and am at and maintaining (long term) a normal weight.. I haven't over-eaten or binged for years....

I have just bought the book and cd by paul Mckenna - I can make you thin. I am not massively overweight but I need to lose a stone or two and find the whole thing a bit too much effort. I would like to think it works.

BTW Dude, I can guarantee, knowing what I do of dieters (call me a liar, I dare you)that those who apparently are stressing about 2, 3, 4 or 5 biscuits are also equally guilty of the 'full packet binge'. As long as you don't pretend to yourself....

I'm not going to recommend Overeaters Anonymous as I dont' think they will help. I'm not a fan of the 12-step approach anyway but I think it is particularly and dangerously inappropriate for eating disorders. Most eating disorders already involve masses of guilt and self-hatred, they are not the same as addictions to drugs, alcohol or gambling which have usually involved (by the time the addict seeks help) theft and at least minor violence; the 12-step 'make amends to everyone you have hurt with your disgusting selfish behaviour' attitude I think is more likely to worsen an eating disorder than fix it.

A lot, if not all, of the 'slimming industry' is actually very toxic and a big con job anyway (the slimming industry expects you to put all the weight back on again because, er, biologically, that's what will happen with every single one of these crappy 'miracle' diets. They make their money out of you coming back and back and badk again, with more wieght to lose every time., because that's what happens.) Get your mental health sorted first. Then you will either be able to improve your general health by changing your lifestyle, or you will be able to assess your lifestyle and decide it doesn't need to change.

Oh, and for anyone who is, or feels they are, overweight and wants to change: Excercise first. Exercising is far, far better for your physical and mental health than depriving yourself of food.

Yeah I think you're speaking sense there solidgold esp. in relation to the diet industry and the benefits of exercise.

i am so glad I came across this thread

i over eat when I am bored, tired, depressed, happy etc etc, i have tried almost every diet out there and they dont stop me overeating

i lost 3 stone on the cambridge diet and have put on 1 stone, so i am now about 1.5 stone overwieght, not a massive amount but I dont really care enough about myself to do anythig about it, but at the same time i am scared that by this time next year i will be back to the way i was

does anyone know if there is any treatment on the NHS for basically not liking yourself and not caring enough to do anything for yourself?

sorry, that sounds very negative but I think its the truth for myself and for a lot of women. I looked at the OE anon website but it seemed to be a lot about discovering GOd and I dont think thats the answer for me to be honest. I had some councelling following pnd where at the end of the 6 sessions you are allowed, the woman basically told me to go and be happy because there was nothing wrong with my life.

i should add that i desperatly do want to do somthing about this because I think it is wrecking my marriage and my relationship with dd too, but how on earth do I start the ball rolling?

I am a compulsive eater and consiquently 2-3 stone overwieght.

My days seems to revolve around when i can next eat, how embarrasing is that!?

I eat huge portions and i have never found myself full up which is a problem for me, i can't seem to rationalise what an apropriate amount of food is, i can easily eat a family sze Pizza, Garlic Bread, Wedges and Dessert to myself in about half an hour, i literally hoover up food.

I don't want to be like this anymore, i have tried all diets under the sun and in general i eat a fairly balanced diet, the food i eat is by no means unhealthy (excpet the Pizza) i can also eat plates and plates full of salad and veg.

I do a fair amount of excersise, i walk the children to school and prance around on stage 2 tims a week, i am constantly cleaning vigerously and i try to use my excersise bike and walk places as much as i can.

I hate the way i am, i just can't seem to shift my wieght.
I think i if i lost this bulk it would change my life,i would have the confidence to do things i can't at the moment and my relationship with dp would improve because at the moment so much of our life is hindered by my lack of confidence becuase of my flabby stomach.

I had my picture taken at my sisters wedding a couple of years ago and my mum proudly displayed the picture in her house and i wept for weeks when i saw it, i had no idea how bad i looked, it literally made me sick.

I did loose 2 stone at Slimming World and the compliments made me feel so great but i couldn't keep up with the group due to other compliments and the wieght has piled on plus more.

I have tried sticking to the diet at home and online but without the phsical presence of the wiegh in i just don't have the willpower to stick to it.

i know exactly what you mean!

I am always thinking about what I can eat next, I also bake a lot and think it is for dh and I wont eat it, but I end up doing just this

I know some people cannot eat when they are full, this is rarely the case for me.

How about this?

JUST

STOP

EATING

Note also that most techniques and therapies to deal with this involve parting with money.

Wow Moondog - so insightful - if only we'd thought of that sooner

What a stupid thing to say@moondog

Exercise doesn't involve money. Counselling on the NHS doesn't, either.

I eat compulsively when dp is at work, and don't enjoy the food, as a lot of others on this thread have said. I am about 4 stone overweight. The only thing that stops is is running. I am up to 28 mins continuous running on the 'couch potato to 5k' there is a thread and a link about it in sport and exercise. Ds has been ill this week and I have not been able to run, I have noticed that I have eaten a LOT more!!

Re moondog's comments, it just shows that there isn't a lot of understanding or sympathy for overeaters, I don't know if you would tell an anorexic to 'Just start eating'?

Yes Moondog, like that episode of Absolutely Fabulous when Saffy says to her mum that the key to losing weight is eating less and exercising more and Edina replies 'Don't be ridiculous, if if was that easy we'd all be doing it.' The problem is it should be easy but it isn't. God knows why but some of us just can't stop eating, but lucky you, it isn't a problem you face. I don't think this is the thread for you!
I tried Paul McKenna but without success. The best thing I tried was acupuncture but you need quite a long course and it was just too expensive.

Oh, moondog would tell an anorexic to "just start eating". Tactful and empathic she ain't.

Well at least she's consistent then.

MarlaSinger - funny you should mention that, I have the PM book and CD and in my desperation last night dug it out and have been listening to it this morning. I've never stuck with it for longer than a few days but I think the approach is definitely right. Unlearning my unhealthy relationship with food.