Older generations of women and weight

[CoffeeMumForever]

Do you think older generations of women, eg 60 plus attach more importance on be-ring slim and frowning on heavier women? I think they do. Also it seems to be a middle class thing too, eg keeping looking good for your ‘man’

This is mind boggling. Wait till you’re older, it’s harder if anything as your body works against you as you age . Menopause causes increased cortisol for many.

and your parents cooking from scratch doesn’t mean the adult child does, what a silly notion, most women have had careers, jobs, busy lives, many of their mothers did not.

and no they dong exclusively see people dying due to crap diets, what do you think these people dying due to these apparent crap diets don’t have anyone younger who knows them?

and being working class doesn’t mean poor.

You’ve read it totally wrong. I’m working class and want to be enjoying my cake when I’m older!

It reads like either snobbery or inverted snobbery snd doesn’t come across well at all. It is also erroneous. The fact you’re working class and want to eat cake doesn’t mean all working class women do or no middle class women do.

Also it seems to be a middle class thing too, eg keeping looking good for your ‘man’

Wow! What a comment!

I'm late 50s. I stay slim for me and my health, I work out and lift weights to maintain my bone health and fitness. Because those things make me feel healthier and more content within myself.

Nothing to do with being older, middle class or anything else. Everything to do with wanting to maintain my health and mobility for as long as possible. Also because I think that my clothes look better on a slim me, and so I feel better mentally about my body.

I’m slim , middle class and in my sixties. I try to stay slim because it’s healthier and I feel better that way. I have exactly zero interest in what any man thinks. I’m completely invisible to the opposite sex now and that’s fine with me.
I think women looking good as they get older has to do with much more than their weight. In fact being slimmer can definitely make your face a bit more haggard. But it’s a fact that your health will suffer if you are very overweight and I think people should try to keep as healthy as possible .

I didn’t say all. Learn to read.

Purely in terms of the age thing, yes, all women in my life over 70 ish are/were obsessed with weight. Their own, other people's, 90% of the time other women/girls but boys and men weren't entirely safe either.

I fucking hate it and have had a weight problem all my adult life. Dds both struggle too which makes me feel even worse but the rebellious reaction to the endless judgement wins most of the time.

Can't really comment on class as everyone I know - 99% working and lower middle class - says the same about their mothers/grans. Sad but hopefully changing to some degree at least, my dds and friends are way more accepting and non judgemental.

At one time it was good to be fat because it showed you were wealthy and well fed. Poor people were thin because they didn't get enough to eat.

It has moved a long way from there, the stereotypes now are that being fat means you don't think about your health and eat junk food and being slim means you eat sensibly, worry about your health and go to the gym.

Ok let me correct that.

It reads like either snobbery or inverted snobbery snd doesn’t come across well at all. It is also erroneous. The fact you’re working class and want to eat cake doesn’t mean mainly working class women do or mainly middle class women don’t,

happy.

I’m 62. I grew up with Jane Fonda feeling ‘The Burn’

I care very much about being slim. Not for men in the least. For me.

Its not for 'your man'
It for your general health.

I think it's hard to generalise. My MIL certainly does, but was considered a fat child and always put on diets by her mother. My DM wasn't like that and considered people being a bit plump (including me!) to be a good thing, and that people being very fat looks uncomfortable for them but was not judgey about it, more sympathetic.

@CoffeeMumForever

Do you think older generations of women, eg 60 plus attach more importance on being slim and frowning on heavier women?

Do you know any women older than 60?

I think they do.

Why? Who do you know thinks like this? Why do you than paint all women over 60 as thinking like this?

Also it seems to be a middle class thing too, eg keeping looking good for your ‘man’

On what basis do you attribute that kind of way of thinking/attitude to a particular class?

Ageist, classist and mysoginistic.

🤨

No ….. the 70’s were when ready made food first started. We ate quite a bit of it. Portion sizes were smaller, but by the very early 80’s they’d increased due to increasing US influence. Although l don’t think mine are larger.

I’ve never seen anyone die in my older relatives from food related stuff. I never think about it, and never have.

Weird

Me too. Some of my friends care - mostly for health reasons. But very few care about what other people, including men, think.

I might add that when you get older your metabolism slows down significantly, especially after the menopause, so it gets MUCH harder to stay slim not easier.

This is my impression - it's the 86 year old in our family who has super controled eating (and bores us rigid telling us what she "allows" herself 🙄) and constantly comments on other women's weight. Her mother was much the same. It comes across as a moral judgement on excess weight.

If it was a young woman who posted that, about older women finding it easier she’s got a horrible shock waiting for her..😂

Mid 60s here. I keep myself slim, probably a stone or two below what I would be if I didn't make an effort. The sole purpose is to be fit and healthy and to carry on doing strenuous sports.

I have no interest in what other people might think or in what their bodies are like.

There have been MANY articles linking obesity with social class, nothing to do with man -
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21333702/

https://www.hud.ac.uk/news/2018/august/obesity-and-its-links-with-social-class/

https://www.institutefornaturalhealing.com/2011/04/the-economics-of-obesity-why-are-poor-people-fat/

https://www.thetimes.com/life-style/health-fitness/article/ozempic-mounjaro-weight-jab-class-ksr9lknjj?

My mum is over 80, very, very posh (genuine 'upper' class / aristocracy) and morbidly obese. Always has been.

Not sure how that fits this theory.

If my grandmother was still alive she would be 80, her sisters are 75 to 85. One has made some seriously sharp comments on my own weight in my life. My grandmother raised me and she was certainly on it but less so.

I was a skinny younger teen, then filled out a bit in my late teens, still slim. I was told to 'trim up' by my gran. That aunt I mentioned told me in my late 20s not to quit smoking until 'You loose that weight' again I wasn't huge just much bigger than she and my gran would have been at her age.

My mother and her sisters are 60 to 42 and I think they do put a lot of value into 'slimness' I was very worried about it for a long time

Averages usually when talking at population level not absolutes

My mum 60+ is OBSESSED with weight, pins her whole self worth on it. When she’s slim she can tackle anything, when she puts weight on she literally puts her life on hold and really restricts what she does (for literally months at a time). It makes me sad to think how much she has missed out on obsessing over it, it defines her and so much of her life experience.

I wish I could say it hasn’t rubbed off on me. But it has.

I disagree with you OP. Having worked in the public sector in deprived areas there are lots of working class people who are very slim because a) genetics, b) can’t afford to eat, c) stay active as they walk a lot and don’t always have private transport d) on drugs/drink and prioritise that over food.

There are plenty of other reasons working class people can be slim but those are the most non-middle class reasons I’ve experienced. On the other hand, it costs more to eat healthy, go to the gym etc so the middle class are likely to be healthier even if they’re not necessarily thinner!

And you don’t feel there are women below the age of 60 who behave this way?

christ have a look at the weight loss injection threads, the amount of envy and resentment from women that others can get their hands on these injections, and I can assure you they are not all over 60.