Should I accept this or keep trying (unsuccessfully)

[Jennysnothere]

I’m 60, for the last 20 years I have weighed as high as 16 stone, mostly around 14 stone but for the last 5 years around 12 stone. I’m only 5 foot 4 inches so still overweight/bordering obese.

I currently weigh 12 stone 4. I would really like to be 10 stone but cannot seem to get below the 12 stone mark. No matter what I try I’d say for the last few years I’ve been trying to get lower. It just doesn’t happen. I even tried GLP1 injections but the chronic side effects (nausea and debilitating insomnia) meant I couldn’t stay on them.

unfortunately I have a severe sweet tooth which scuppers most of my efforts, it’s like an addiction with serious withdrawal effects.

Anyway, my DH says I look fine and should just accept myself as I am, that I’ve probably hit my ‘natural’ body weight and that my body just won’t let me drop any more weight. I do small group training sessions 3 times a walk, cardio sessions 2 times a week and walk a lot, at least 2 x dog walks a day so it’s not like I’m lacking exercise.

Just wondering what others thought. Is it true that I’ve hit my natural body weight? Should I just accept myself as I am or do I keep trying to lose weight?

Obviously it's up to you. You absolutely CAN lose weight.

And if you stop eating sugar you'll find you stop craving it. It's not technically addictive. It also makes you hungry so you eat more.

What have you tried so far?

I don’t think it’s your natural body weight, you could definitely be 10 stone at that height. You’ve answered your own question, you have a serious sweet tooth so probably eating too many calories. It is totally in your power to lose it
To stay slim I just can’t eat what I want. It’s the hard truth of keeping weight off.

You're the same height as me, I believe 10st 5 would be the top end of healthy BMI so might be a good goal for you.
There's no easy way, but cutting out UPF food will lower your sugar intake - you have to wean yourself off it. The less added sugar you eat, the more you will start to taste naturally occurring sugars.

If you can wean yourself off sugar, you’ll win this battle. Yes, it is an addiction, but it can be done. I would recommend Dr Becky Gillaspy’s short talks on YouTube. She has a huge back catalogue and listening to one each day can be very motivating. She herself used to be very overweight, so she knows whereof she speaks!

For a more in-depth explanation of sugar addiction, Dr Mark Hyman’s The Blood Sugar Solution is excellent.

I mean, if you are eating a lot of sugar, then it's not your natural body weight.
You need to decide how badly you want to lose weight, but in my experience losing weight after 45 is about giving up something.

I am a similar height and 64 and weigh 10st 7llbs. I recently got down from 11st 7 but now feel stuck. I want to be 10st (healthy weight). I am keeping going because I think previously I have just given up (its the second time in recent years that Ive lost this stone).

I am getting out of ideas and pretty bored - Im eating protein, veg, less carbs, no sugar, small boring portions.. However you can give up sugar which will make a huge difference.

Have you tracked what you actually eat in a day?
What serious withdrawal effects do you suffer from? Most sugar withdrawal symptoms should pass in a few days with good hydration.

You are obviously unhappy about your weight so try something different. You describe your activity but not your diet, so what do you eat? How had you tried losing in the past?

There is no such thing as a natural body weight, our bodies are the weight they are due to how much we consume, consume less and it’s lighter, consume more and it’s heavier, you know this, as otherwise you’d not gain weight.

people only use this ridiculous set point theory when it comes to weight loss. No one seems to use it about weight gain, it’s illogical either way.

if you want to weigh less then consume less.

Thanks for all your input. So far I have tried low carb, keto, calorie counting, hypnosis. I am not a morning eater and don’t consume food til about 11am. But after that all bets are off.

at 11am I tend to have a protein shake as I am not a huge protein lover so it’s a way to increase my intake. Lunch can be a salad or sandwich maybe egg, ham, avocado but then I need sugar and may eat a chocolate bar and a handful of sweets.

mid afternoon and I turn to chocolate and sweets again. Tea could be chilli and rice, fish and potatoes and veg. But I must have pudding, it could ba an apple but that won’t satisfy me so again I reach for more chocolate.

8 pm and we wind down with tv, herbal tea and popcorn and/or chocolate.

yes, it’s that bad….

Sugar is not physically addictive. I also have a “sweet tooth” which I tackled through hypnotherapy. First with a handful of appointments (which cost a tonne) and then with hypnosis apps.

It can be done!

I should also point out that all my meals are cooked from scratch so no UPFs. It’s just the chocolate…..

That amount of chocolate says it all. Keto and fad diets won't work if you eat chocolate 3 times a day.
As pp said, if you want to weigh less, eat less..No great mystery about it.

I’m guessing you know op irs all the chocolate and sweets right?

You have convinced yourself you need sugar and can’t get through the day without regular chocolate and handfuls of sweets. You don’t need it and any headache from stopping would pass within a few days.

I wonder if you're setting yourself up for 'failure' a bit with the protein shake? Usually they are either sugary or have sweetners. Would it be worth trying a savoury source of protein instead?

I mean, you don't need sugar, chocolate nor must you have a pudding after dinner. These are habits not a need, exacerbated by the large swings in blood sugar that will happen as a result.

What are the "serious withdrawal effects" that happen if you cut out the sugar for a day?

It is not the protein shake. It’s the chocolate and sweets three or four times a day and pudding.

You misunderstand me. Of course there's nothing inherently wrong with a protein shake. But if you believe you are addicted to sugar and struggle to stop eating it, then I'm not sure having something sweet as your first 'meal' of the day is entirely sensible.

As others have pointed out, for some people the more sugar you have the more you crave it. Perhaps ditching the protein shake (if it even is sweet!) may make it easier to avoid the puddings and chocolate

Yeah but it’s a bit of a reach really isn’t it. The protein shake is likely to fill her up, not send her on a daily chocolate frenzy.

thanks, the protein shake does have sweeteners in it. The side effects are extreme irritability, very low mood. Body shakes and sweats, cravings that seem to turn me into a mad women. I hate how I behave when I haven’t got sugar in my system but know I need to severely reduce it.

Also, to the PP who mentioned hypnosis. I’ve tried several apps. I’m currently using one which I have listened to every night since July 25. No difference. The only reason I’ve carried on this long with it it because it helps my sleep….unfortunately not my mindset/weight.

I think some of it also is very low self esteem, I’m introverted and dont make friends easily even though I’d like some I think. I need to work on that.

thanks for all your advice and suggestions.

Something that works (at times) for me is to not cut out the chocolate, but I do reduce it.
Maltesers are my go to - if I’m craving chocolate I can have 3.
and only twice a day.

Are you sure you’re not diabetic?

Yes, please check for diabetes, if you haven't already.

The apps will not work at first. You need an in-person appointment to start with. Maybe once a week / once a fortnight for a few months. Then you can possibly maintain with an app.

You sound quite unhappy day-to-day, so if you can crack this it won't just benefit you in terms of a healthy weight.