Fat Mess

[CrouchedTiger]

So let’s just be brutal…I am officially a fat mess, I’m terribly obese, overhanging belly, can’t be bothered showering etc I’m just a tramp.
I have had an awakening that I need to get myself in gear and unleash the sexy lady hiding under the gross layers of fat!

Where do I start? I’m thinking off the books SW (let’s face it I can’t afford and don’t have the time! - I have a toddler, work FT) any diet pills to order?

Appreciate the help! (UK Based)

You can get orlistat from online pharmacy but you won't be able to eat as you are now or you will quite bluntly shit your pants.
Cheaper to just change your mindset and eat more fruit and vegetables

I know you said not Slimming World but I really recommend it. I joined on 2nd January and have lost two stones (still plenty to go but I'm getting there). I have found it SO helpful. It's only an hour a week and is really easy and being in a group with other people in the same boat has been really encouraging. I think you can do it on line if you can't get to meetings. My brother was referred for free SW classes by your GP because he was over a certain weight...don't know if that would apply to you.

It's not rocket science. Eat less calories (log everything in mfp maybe) and cut out processed food, chocolate, fizzy drinks, takeaways, alcohol etc.
swap refined carbs for small portions of whole grain.
Eat more lean protein.
Do you exercise at all? How many steps does your phone say you do a day?

Make small sustainable changes, one at a time until they're habits e.g. a piece of fruit each day or 5 min walk. Keep adding more. Gradually develop healthy long term sustainable life style.

My first thought is how’s your mental health been lately? As not showering and your not being very kind to yourself op!

In my early twenties I used to cut out a cake or a takeaway and boom I was 8.5/9 stone! Late 20’s keto was my go to! In my 30’s I am literally a slave to mfp!

Whats your age and current weight for a starting point?

Not very helpful for a weight loss advice group is it we all know what it takes 🙄.

Some people just need the best suggestions/advice to go with it not nasty bluntness.

Also op, be careful of not changing your diet and just adding fruit.
If you're overweight you're more ar risk of t2 diabetes and most fruit has a lot of sugar (bananas, grapes etc)
I would personally focus on including more fresh veg in your diet.
Could you ask your Gp to run some bloods for cholesterol and blood glucose (hb1ac)? Might help to know if you should specifically be cutting back on fats or sugars or both

I’m 254lbs so 19stone… I’ve never been this heavy in my life 🤦🏻‍♀️ I’m tired all the time which I know is prob diet related, I don’t have time to go to a gym as I have no child care at all (DH works away & we’re not near family and I have no friends) I do like fruit and veg but I think I binge on crap because I’m hungry.
I’m what the title says a f**king fat mess.
SW I could do, I just can’t go to classes or online as can’t afford the fees so I could do it based on online forums etc…
I could do YouTube 10000 step videos but to be honest I just go to bed when it’s bedtime for my LO. X

Join MFP and follow the calorie counting/sw influencers for tips. Cram in the steps. Weight loss is all about calorie intake. High protein yog for breakfast, wrap with something for lunch, salad and some protein for dinner with a couple of low cal snacks in between. Eat less than you burn.

Losing weight is 80% diet. Some exercise will help. Lots of you tube videos out there.

follow the government advice of 5 pieces of fruit & veg a day, drink lots of water, ease up on alcohol & carbonated drinks.

don’t buy crap-then you don’t eat it.

I was thinking pinch of nom as heard they are good. Just need to cook which I have no motivation to 🤦🏻‍♀️

What is your normal routine and eating habits?

aww OP you do sound stuck in a bit of a rut and I totally get it. It’s a cycle of eating crap then feeling like crap then not being bothered to look after yourself and not having the energy to do anything so you end up binging on crappy food again, and the cycle continues.

The harsh truth is this will only stop when you stop eating the super processed, calorific foods. You don’t need to live on salads, with all due respect at 19 stone you would only need to cut down 300-500 cals a day at this point and you’d start to lose weight. You will probably be eating double what you need to be, you don’t need to half your calories to start, just drop them a little bit. A few less biscuits a day, one less slice of bread, a banana instead of a bag of crisps after lunch. That sort of thing, you don’t need to totally overhaul everything in one go (of course if you wanted to, you could. But if you need to start small then that will still work). Once you’ve made a couple of tweaks you’ll start to feel a bit more motivated.

pinch of nom is good yes! If you don’t feel able to cook from scratch every night, do it every other night, or 3 times a week.

Don’t let great be the enemy of good - you don’t have to be perfect you just have to start.

Also, taking care of yourself will help. You deserve to feel clean and fresh and looked after just as much as your baby.

OP it’s so sad seeing you refer to yourself as a tramp and a fat mess with no friends. Be kinder to yourself.

I really think that you need to see the GP as a starting point. You sound awfully low.

And if you end up needing to attend classes such as SW, or fitness sessions, you’ll need to talk to your husband about making sure you have the capacity to do so either via him looking after DC or hiring a sitter. You will need his support to sort out your health, it will be hard to do it alone, both emotionally and practically.

This is far more doable than you might think or feel right now put your weight and height into mfp to put you in a calorie deficit, you’ll be surprised at how many calories you’d be allowed! Bulk on super low calorie foods! I still eat loads and hit 1800 calories a day! I’ve switched to sweetener the most important thing is not to drink your calories I’ve learnt so lots of zero drinks water semi skimmed milk in teas and coffees best sweetener by far on the market is silver spoon I’ve found!

My favourite buys are Lidl skinny sausages at 72 calories per sausage entire tray of ready root veg mash 200 calories and tescos own cauliflower cheese 260 for the entire thing bulked out with broccli nice serving of gravy and you are in the region of 700 calories and it’s a very hearty meal I like 4 weetabix in the morning 136 for 2 biscuits with 300ml of semi skimmed milk topped with sweetener under 500 calorie breakfast!

The absolute key is reading labels nothing is off limits for my chocolate fix I love options Belgium hot chocolate with a small chocolate bar If your a cheese girl baby bel lights only come in at 42 cals per round!

Its far less daunting when you discover how much you are actually allowed! You will become really fussy with food too I don’t eat anything that doesn’t taste absolutely lovely because I’ll think well I’m not wasting my calories on that! Lol! Xx

You may be able to be referred to SW for free for a few months by your doctor. I'm not the biggest advocate for SW as a long term approach but a supportive group setting might help you to get started.

@CrouchedTiger i think you should start by not talking about yourself in such horrible terms!! Would you describe another person like this? I bet not!
okay, so you’re overweight/obese or whatever. So what! We all have our challenges but none of them are going to be resolved by treating ourselves with contempt.

you know what it takes to loose weight: eat less, move more. But you’re not going to manage that unless you start treating yourself with kindness.

I bet you are fab OP and that you have many wonderful qualities. Start acknowledging those and focusing on those rather than the number on the scales, and I bet you will find your weight loss efforts more successful. Good luck:-)

700 cals for one meal? That's loads

No not really is it if your in a 1800 calorie defecit still leaving 1100 calories for the rest of the day?! So say 500 calorie breakfast 600 calorie lunch? Fail to see how it’s a lot of calories.

Not if @Babsexxx calorie target is 1800 per day, she still has 1100 to spread out over the rest of the day!

OP, the only thing that has ever worked for me is eating in a calorie deficit, and tracking on my fitnesspal/nutracheck. You don't need to be in a huge deficit, but you need to work out your calorie target.

Google TDEE calculator and pop your details in which will work out a moderate deficit for you, then track what you are eating within this amount. Focus on protein, fruit/veg and make sure to include a few low calorie treats within your target so you can still enjoy it.

Try to increase your steps to begin with. You don't need to start doing loads of mad exercise just yet either, see if you can fit in a walk at lunchtime?

There are loads of credible people to follow on insta/Facebook who can explain it all better than I can.

I recommend the fitness chef and James smith as really good places to start.

Join the pinch of nom group on Facebook. It's lovely and supportive. I have all the books and swear by the recipies.

I know it seems like a huge mountain to climb, my starting weight was more than yours, however it is possible. Don't get overwhelmed at having a lot to lose, just for starters try to lose 1 or 2lb. Then half a stone. Then another half stone. Keep going until you're where you want to be. You can do this.

700 calories for an evening meal is not ‘loads’.

Lets not start with the competitive undereating on this thread. That won’t help the OP at all.

Exactly! The 'oh I never eat more than 1200 calories a day' crowd can keep themselves off here.

254 lbs is 18 stone 2 lbs so not as bad as you thought OP.

Joggo app and lots of fruit smoothies (frozen bags of fruit) for lunch did well for me last summer.

If I were you I would track my calories at 2000 to start with. I use my fitness pal and it’s free. I would aim for lots of veggies and unprocessed foods andi would batch cook so that you always have easy meals and snacks. I made home made protein balls and froze them so I could get one at a time. Stop buying the high calorie junk food and anything you will graze on. So getting your DP on board is really important.

I would also getting a pedometer and get your steps up, either walking outside or finding some free walking workouts on YouTube, they don’t need to be 10k in one go. I do the Get Fit With Rick ones and they go from 10 mins 1500 steps to 10k steps at about 70m with lots of different ones and lengths. There are to pop music so your toddler could join in too if they wanted to do their own version.

Keep posting on here for support or find a challenge thread and join in.

The last tip I would offer is whilst you are eating better and exercising, work on making yourself feel better, get washing/ moisturising/ shave your legs/ paint your nails / get your hair cut/ iron your clothes or whatever makes you feel better.

Take control and show yourself you are worth looking after.