Mutual support thread for those currently losing or working towards losing a lot of weight

[UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme]

This is a mutual support thread for anyone who wants (and needs) to lose a lot of weight, is mid way through losing a lot of weight, or is nearing the end of a big weight loss and wants to continue to support and be supported as maintenance approaches.

The previous thread has been massively helpful to regular posters, as we share both our losses and our plateau or gains, congratulate or console, and talk about what works for us while understanding that different things work for different people, and we are all different ages, all have different families/ households/ people to plan around, different commitments, different working lives and different health conditions which partly determine our approaches.

We are all on this journey together - this thread is for us to encourage one another, post updates, chat about what we're doing, how we're doing, share stories and thoughts and sometimes wander slightly off topic if we want, but everyone posting should be somewhere along the journey towards escaping high BMI obesity.

The previous thread was started by someone who no longer posts and initially asked how to lose 9 stone - it developed into a support thread for people with varying amounts left to lose but all of whom started out with at least 5 or 6 stone + / 30 or 35 kg + to lose, very roughly...

No links to selling sites or unsolicited "helpful" lectures please - mutual support from existing and new posters all actually living this big weight loss now, or just starting out, welcome!

Previous thread here:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/weight_loss_chat/3894410-i-need-to-lose-9st-help

I've had a whoosh too this week - 82.2kg. That officially takes me to more than 30kg lost. Happy Sunday everyone

Hi all - I’m new here and joined just for this thread

I’ve decided I’m FINALLY ready to shift some of this weight. I’m unhealthy, unhappy and it needs to go. My children and husband need me healthy but more importantly (or so I’m told) I need to do it for myself.

I’m 5’3 and the scales this morning put me at 14 stone. I was shocked when I saw it as I thought I couldn’t be much more than 13 stone but never mind.

I don’t have an ideal weight in mind I’d like to achieve but I’m thinking for my height somewhere between 8 stone and 9 stone would be ideal, so that gives me a total loss of between 5 and 6 stone.

It’s such a mammoth amount and I’ve no idea where to start really. I’m thinking small changes to begin with, such as skimmed milk rather than semi, wholemeal bread rather than white, sweetener rather than sugar, dark chocolate rather than milk (can’t eat much dark).

Any other tips would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you

Zebracat and alphaechokiwi well done!

OneCatTooMany welcome - there's no one way, you have to find what's effective and sustainable for you. We have a range of approaches on here, but I'd say for pretty much everyone cutting down on/ overly processed food including refined sugar is certainly a good start. I wouldn't personally start using sweetner - its impact on the body is complex and can leave you craving more sweet flavours - people who drink diet fizzy drinks and sweeten tea snd coffee with artificial sweeteners don't necessarily have as much success as people who cut the sugar out without replacing it with artificial sweeteners - but its all just trial and error really til you find what works for you personally.

I've had a gain this week - 76.5kg (75.2 last week) not sure why, but equally last week I had a huge 1.8kg loss and didn't really have an explanation for that either! Perhaps it was actually last week that was the blip ... hmm

I think my portion size has been creeping up perhaps, and I've had a small second helping at dinner a couple of times which doubtless removes the benefit of not having snacked at all and stuck to two meals, no snacks! Will have to give myself a little kick this week and say no when DH serves himself a second helping and offers me one! The disadvantage of putting the serving dishes in the middle of the table so everyone can serve themselves! Also DD planned last week's meals and they were a bit carb heavy - we've had oven pancakes, toad in the hole, chicken and mushroom pasta... hmm no wonder!

Finally down to 100kgs this week.

Hope to be under 100 next week!

Rebuildingconfidence well done!

Zebracat I meant to say thank you for your kind comments on the school situation for my dc3. I also wanted to ask how you inherited a child, but realise that might be inappropriate.

Our outdoor pools have finally opened today! You need a negative covid test less than 24 hours old or to have had both vaccinations with at least 15 days elapsed since the second one, and to book online in advance, so on the one hand its an annoying hassle for taking the kids - have a get them tested every time - but on the other hand its selfishly rather convenient for me as I had my second vaccination in February through work, so I've just booked nine sessions in advance whenever I can get there around work, and I do delight in as few people as possible in the pool I've also booked dc3 a test this lunch time and swimming for him and me this afternoon - it's only 16 degrees today so the older two don't want to go, but the water's heated ...

@UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme 0.3kg is a very small fluctuation. I wouldn't worry too much in your shoes. But I totally get what you are saying about little things that creep in. I'm 20kg from even thinking about maintenance, but I guess it's this kind of thing which will be really important.
@OneCatTooMany - welcome. We are all taking different approaches, trying to find something long term and sustainable. But cutting sugar and avoiding processed food is a very good place to start. Good luck

@Rebuildingconfidence very well done!

@Rebuildingconfidence – that’s a great milestone – well done!

@alphaechokiwi – that’s brilliant – great work and great milestone!

@UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme – we all have those weeks but with you having a big loss last week if you look over the two week period it is still a loss. Also great news about your son, really pleased for you.

@Zebracat – it is inspirational to see people losing weight as it makes me think that I can do it too but I have felt my losses are slow compared to others too but it’s just different stroke for different folks and I think slow and steady is going to work better for some of us.

That’s good about your thyroid meds. I have had another borderline result on mine this week so need to be tested again in 3 months. I’m convinced this is an issue for me.

@ScottishBeth I well jel as the kids (used to) say , I hope you had a nice relaxing time.

@OneCatTooMany – welcome to the thread! I’d echo what UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme said, it is a bit of trial and error finding what works for you but you’ll get lots of tips and support on here which you can try and if it doesn’t work for you there will always be something else to try that might suit you better.

To give you my two pence worth what worked for me was definitely one step at a time. In the past I have tried to do everything at once and it gets too much and I just give up. I started with a healthy breakfast (smoothies with banana, fruit, spinach, almond butter, plant milk and protein powder – I also added date syrup while I was getting used to it but now I don’t need it) which I sip for an hour or so and with fruit I find it keeps me filled until lunch.

Then I started healthy lunches – home made soups with wholemeal bread (my soup maker is the best thing I have ever bought, I use it for my smoothies too) or veg omelettes.

Then I started exercising, and although I have seen it said that it does not contribute much to losing weight, the positive impact to mental and physical health is massive for me and it makes me feel that I don’t want to ‘waste’ that effort by then eating rubbish.

Final step was to give up the sugar (I personally can’t do moderation so this was essential for me) It was really tough at first as I used to eat a LOT of sugary things but now I don’t even crave it.

The healthy meals on an evening is still a work in progress (too many takeaways) but I’m getting there and keeping with it even when I have a tough week.

I think the key difference from other times I have tried to lose weight is that I am not seeing this as a diet that I can stop when I lose weight – this is my life now and eating well and exercising is something I need to do for the rest of my life.

It sounds like you have a good attitude and as I said you’ll find lots of support and help here from people who really get it. Just don’t stop coming on even if you go through a rough patch, it is a marathon not a sprint and you can do it.

I lost 1.6lbs / 0.73kgs last week, that’s an overall loss of 12lbs / 5.4 kgs and overall my BMI is down from 42.8 to 40.8 which I am happy with – slow and steady is the way I want to do this.

I have been building up my walking and have just had slight twinges in the calf muscle I pulled. It is definitely taking longer than I anticipated to heal and I am realty missing the running. I’m going to do a bit of research today on other forms of exercise I can do in the meantime.

Foodwise it is going ok – still too many takeaways but I’m still sugar free (6 weeks and counting!) so I’m not going to beat myself up too much although I’m going to keep trying to reduce the takeaways (and cheese!).

Had the results of my blood test and ECG this week as my resting heart rate is really low (professional athlete levels ) and apart from a borderline thyroid result and a slight vit D deficiency they didn’t find anything. The thing is I am absolutely exhausted and am having naps during the day and going to bed really early but still feeling worn out. it’s just not normal. Usually I’d just leave it but am going to push with the Dr this time, just can’t see what it could be though.

Well done @alphaechokiwi and @Zebracat on your losses! That's amazing.

I also have the issue where I do quite well at losing weight, and then fall off and stay off for about 2 years! Trying really hard this time to keep going, even if I have a week (or a month) where it doesn't look so good.

@UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme I have to confess to being a bit confused about the school system in Germany, so I'm struggling to follow what is going on with your son. I think the latest update is good news? I really hope things work out for him, anyway. I'm sorry about your gain, but sure it will come off again. It's so easy just once in a while to have another helping and forget what affect it will have! Also that is good news about swimming! It does sound like a faff, but that's just the way of things now. I hope you enjoy it!

@Rebuildingconfidence - well done and am keeping my fingers crossed for you for next week!

@OneCatTooMany Welcome! Agree with others that there are lots of different ways to lose weight. If you look through the thread you'll see lots of methods represented here. But most of us are focussed on things that are sustainable, so making small changes is a good place to start.

@Rebuildingconfidence. I am thrilled for you. 100 k felt like an unbreakable barrier to me, it was lovely to get through it, I am sure you will crack on from here.
@UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme. I love your reflections on your gain, it’s all learning, it’s going to help us so much in the future. I inherited a teenager 3 years ago, when she was removed from her family. We are related, but there was a big distance so we didn’t know her very well.
There were a lot of problems but she’s doing really well now. It was massively stressful though, and I gained a lot of weight.
@alphaechokiwi well done you, whoop whoop!
@MamaNewtNewt. Great loss, very well done. And I find them inspirational too. Guess I’m so worried about failing that slow sometimes feels like stalled.
@OneCatTooMany Welcome and love your user name. I did consider Toomanypets as a name for me. It’s often heard in this house. I hope you feel really comfortable here. 5 stone does seem a lot to lose, but remember that you will start to feel benefits long before that. My general health and fitness is hugely improved after losing a stone and a half. I feel lighter, more energetic and interested. My clothes fit better, my house is tidier, my dogs are exhausted. It’s all good. Thinking about making a change is terrifying, but doing it is exhilerating(and terrifying!).
I read the dr Chattergee book, which is a bit smug and unconvincing(he really isn’t just like us because he has been known to buy sweets for a journey) but he has lots of good advice. I also have the No S book, and I do follow those principles and find it really helpful.

Can I join please. I lost 3 stone a couple of years ago have stalled since the first lockdown and still have another 3 to go. I feel stuck and constantly start again then find myself raiding the biscuit tin. My first target is 7lb which would move me from obese to overweight.

Hey everyone hope you're well

Having a break this weekend as it's my birthday, so treated myself to an Indian last night. Probably put on a couple of pounds but hey ho, will be back on it tomorrow

Welcome @Readytostartagain. Well done for maintaining a 3 stone loss. Sure we can all learn from you too!
@BippityBoppity87 Happy Happy Birthday to you. I hope you’ve had a lovely weekend x

Hello. I weighed myself this week after being in denial. Last March I was the smallest I had been in years and I was so pleased with myself, I fit into everything I owned.
Then lockdown happened. And I’ve put on 16 fucking kilos.... I’m so disappointed in myself. I put in so much effort and just gave it up.
I’ve been back at it for a few days and I am good when I am in the zone.
If I could get 5kilos off in the short term I know I would feel loads better to start. I’m worried my age is against me for losing it all again.

Thank you all who replied. I’ll figure out how to tag people at some point

Today has been a good day. I have porridge and a banana for breakfast, a chilli chicken and red pepper wrap for lunch and pork and pepper gnocchi for tea. Also was working today and due to my job I walk about 5 miles a day so it seems a good first day.

I must admit I’ve been feeling really low about my weight. I feel fat, frumpy and disgusting and can’t for the life of me understand what my husband sees in me (6 stone weight gain since we met when I was 17 - I’m 34 now - frustratingly he’s still the same weight and clothes size, the only thing that’s a bit different is grey hair and some laugher lines how is that fair).

But I realise it’s about much more than how I look; it’s my health and by default my families health - if I eat better they will too and that’s how I’m going to look at it from now on

@OneCatTooMany your post made me feel very sad for you. It also resonated with me because I have often felt the same. Believe me, your worth as a person is so much more than a number on a scale. Please feel free to ignore me if it's not for you, but I'd like to point you towards the thread in Style and Beauty called something like 'Plus size what are you wearing today' it's full of women making the absolute most of their shape and size as they are now. It's helped me so much because they look amazing, all size 16 and upwards. And seeing these wonderful women taking joy in looking their best has made me so much more confident about myself, whatever my size and lumps and bumps. I've even posted there a bit as have others on this thread.

[quote alphaechokiwi]@OneCatTooMany your post made me feel very sad for you. It also resonated with me because I have often felt the same. Believe me, your worth as a person is so much more than a number on a scale. Please feel free to ignore me if it's not for you, but I'd like to point you towards the thread in Style and Beauty called something like 'Plus size what are you wearing today' it's full of women making the absolute most of their shape and size as they are now. It's helped me so much because they look amazing, all size 16 and upwards. And seeing these wonderful women taking joy in looking their best has made me so much more confident about myself, whatever my size and lumps and bumps. I've even posted there a bit as have others on this thread.[/quote]
Thank you, I’ll check it out.

Some days are better than others to be honest but it was a low point needing to order a size 20 in my new work trousers today that’s for sure x

I know what you mean @OneCatTooMany I've been with my partner for about 10 years and his weight has stayed pretty much consistent. Although the last lockdown he managed to lose two stone I was like how?! He didn't change anything he ate and was still drinking litres of Pepsi daily. He did go out and walk more, but nothing drastic. Was just like how does that work?! I only have to look at a cookie or a packet of crisps and I gain 5lbs

I have about 8 stone to lose. So a long way to go. Relaxed a bit this weekend. Back on it tomorrow. I bought a lumea prestige today, pricey, but due to pcos and added weight gain, I've become extremely hairy, especially on my face, so hoping I get that under control, will give me a bit of a confidence boost and added determination. Then once I reach the 15 stone mark, so another 3 stone, I'll treat myself to a nice haircut and colour. So that's my next goal

Thank you @Zebracat

I've had a couple of not so great days. I've eaten all the chocolate. Nothing particularly stressful going on with me but I think I have a bit of 'diet fatigue'. So I'm trying to get my head back in the game.
Success depends not on the last few days, but on resetting and continuing on.... fingers crossed!

@alphaechokiwi
How much chocolate is all the chocolate? A bar, a drawerful, a cupboardfull, a shopfull, all the chocolate in your city? Have you eaten the entire production of Switzerland?
We need answers. Have you left any for me?

Sorry, not meaning to be flippant. I know it can feel really bad. But you have been incredibly disciplined for months and months. Maybe you should think about a week or two of maintenance?

@Zebracat thanks for making me laugh tonight!!!
I've raided eaten all of the stash of chocolate buttons I keep to bribe my 5 yr old....and while I'm confessing... a big bar of cooking chocolate I found too.

Oh well, onwards!!!

And yes, @zebracat you are wise as always with your advice... I'm aiming for maintenance this week. Going to relax and take stock a bit. Thanks again for your funny and kind response x