Contemplating bariatric surgery.... advice?

[Seriouslyconfused3]

Hi as the title states I am contemplating a gastric sleeve. I am a serial yo yo dieter and my metabolism is fucked. I have pcos and have tried Xenical, saxenda etc- successful until I stop using and the weight piles back on.

I’ve seen an endocrinologist and he said that, in his opinion, sometimes surgery is the only viable option. I’d be paying for it myself as I don’t quite meet the nhs criteria yet.

I’m miserable- I don’t lose weight unless I starve myself ie 600 calories a day and then I’m even more unhappy. I’m worried about my health in the long term, but then the prospect of surgery scares me too.

Any advice from those who have been there before?

@LaurieFairyCake haha, nowhere NEAR a Caesarian sized cut.

All told, I’ve got 6 incisions, 4 are small, maybe 2cm or 3cms long, of those, 2 have what looks like 1 stitch in them (under the glue), the other 2 don’t look like there’s any stitch, just glue holding them.

2 are a bit bigger ... 1 is 4cms and has, I think, 2 stitches. The main 1 (which the stomach was pulled out of) is covered by a dressing still but is max 6cms and I would think no more than 3 stitches.

Based on a previous laparoscopy I had years ago, the scars will fade quickly and, over time, you won’t really notice them unless specifically looking iykwim.

Much less sore today, onward and upward 😆

Did they use dissolvable sutures or stitches you’ll have to have removed @MonkeysandParrots?

@passmethewineplease dissolvable

I haven't read the whole thread but saw the title (and the fact it's quite old)

I had gastric band 10 years ago. Best decision I could have made. Happy to answer any questions.

monkeys So I talked to the surgeon of the most expensive and nearest place and they said the could book me in as early as Sep 2. He said I might have to stay an extra night because m kidneys aren't great but obviously losing weight would be better in the long run. So maybe a 2 night stay.

sofas since you have done the surgery do you think it would be possible to drink 2L of fluid per day the first few days or not? Did you get dehydrated?

I am thinking of doing the Sept 2 date to get it over with. I know I will never succeed on my own with dieting. I have spend 10 years slowly gaining!!

sofas it sounds like you are really happy how things have turned out. That does encourage me.

@1984andout. Great to see a positive band result after so many years. Hope you don't mind a list of questions
Is your weight maintaining and steady now? How much have you lost?
Does your band restrict your portions or do you have to do that for yourself?
Do things ever get stuck?
Do you find your healthy eating has become second nature or do you still have to think about it?

@Sofasogood1 When I first thought about surgery the idea of not being able to eat as I wanted felt almost like a bereavement and filled me with dread so I turned it down. I think your post explains perfectly how it can still be a pleasure but in a much healthier way

Thanks for the questions

Is your weight maintaining and steady now?

Yep. I'm 5'8. 10 stone 5. Ish. Been the same for years.

How much have you lost?

6 stone

Does your band restrict your portions or do you have to do that for yourself?

Definitely restricts potions. I'm used to it now. So is DH who does all the cooking. At a restaurant I just order a starter.

Do things ever get stuck?

Yes - pasta and bread. I never eat them now.

Do you find your healthy eating has become second nature or do you still have to think about it?

Definitely still have to think about it. Especially as I'm an endurance runner now. It's more about fuel than dieting. Completely different mindset.

@foolsand I think it is possible to get water in, but you need to do it slowly. I used to gulp large glasses but you can't do that ever again really. In the days after surgery your stomach is so swollen - and therefore tiny. Just sip sip sip constantly. Gradually you can drink more and more.

I've always been a good water drinker but for the first few months after the op I found I preferred squash actually so mainly drank that.

I really want to get my op booked, but I still haven't heard back from eweightloss. Might look at a different provider if they don't get back to me soon.

@Coronacurls Really sorry, just replied to your PM.

@Foolsand if you can afford it, sounds like the jfdi approach with the local guy is the way forward?

Ugh.
I asked XH if he would be available possible a couple days in Sept or Oct (depending on which place I go to) and he was a bit arsey. He really wanted to know what I was doing (he is a very controlling person) and I found myself not telling him. His family always acted very sneery about my X SIL weight and how she had to get help to lose it.

I don't have any family to check on my DCs and I would be away for 2-3 nights min.
I just don't want him to know. He tries to know everything else I do. Even now we're not married I am still intimidated by him and I don't have anyone to support me.
Sorry for the derail.

It's not a derail! It's important so you can get it done.

Lie? A 'laparoscopic operation for a personal issue/fanny problem' perhaps?!

Do you have any friends that can help?

Or hernia issue perhaps?

My DH had a gastric sleeve 6 years ago and overall has lost 9 stone after putting 2 back on. He'd definitely recommend it but he is able to cheat with it by snacking. So he has a small snack, then a bit later another small snack and then another small snack not long after!! As he snacks on bad stuff eg chocolate, crisps etc, the weight is creeping back. He is able to eat larger portions than he could initially. So it's vital to address psychological eating issues as these can derail things. But overall it's still had a great impact.

No I don't have friends willing to check on DCs. It is what it is. I.... am.... almost.... there.... DC.... freedom wise. That boulder is almost at the top off the hill. Just a few more years and man will I ever run down the other side of the hill.

I don't think I can lie about the type of operation. I think that would get too complicated.

I think I need to woman up and tell him what I am doing and why -- kidneys, blood pressure, etc. Maybe he can keep tabs on them or come up for a couple days. I suppose this is one for the relationship or separation boards.. I was having a bit of meltdown having to talk to him.

carla That's what I read about the sleeve. Ultimately you can eat 1200 calories per day or something so you still have to reduce carbs and eat well. But as you say, your DH is still down 7 stone so that is still a huge difference.

If I am actually SATISFIED on 1200 calories I'm going to be so happy

I know I can lose weight consistently on 1400 so to actually be satisfied on 1200 without climbing the walls with hunger would just be AMAZING

I think I ate under 1000 calories yesterday. Half that bacon sandwich for breakfast (255 est cals), small salad and scrambled egg wrap for lunch (263 cals) and for dinner watermelon, feta, olive, Balsamic, Parma ham (299). Two crackers and peanut butter as a snack which honestly I could have done without.

Snacks were nearly 500 though! Condensed milk for my coffee, X2 beers and a whisky.

Morning 😆

Warning, this is a bit long 🙃

This time last week, I was in recovery - how times flies! So thought I’d give you a little update a week out.

Outwardly, feeling physically nearly back to normal most of the time, am aware I need to be careful moving in certain ways & I still get sore if I don’t lie on my back at night. Going for 2 walks a day seems to work better than 1 long walk. Am glad I’ve got another week off.

Liquids - can drink a whole cup of tea or coffee (as opposed to a small tea cup) over about 30 mins. Need to focus on large sips still otherwise I can feel discomfort as it goes down.

Food wise, still on smooth soups & yoghurts ... breakfast today was 80g of total 5% Greek yoghurt which I then loosened slightly with some milk. I bought some small cutlery from amazon & am using the spoon from that (I think it’s smaller than a normal teaspoon) to eat with - I still only half fill it at a time. If I go too fast, I can feel it and then slow down.

No nausea at all.

I’ve got another 6 days of smooth liquid food then onto ‘soft moist food’ which I only have to purée if I can’t tolerate more texture.

(I find the differing guidelines for what to have when interesting ... certainly those I have been given seem to be on the more relaxed side of things)

So, for the first time since the op, I got on the scales this morning and I am down 8lbs. So, 20lbs in total when including the LRD stage also.

You’d think I’d be ecstatic right?

Well, yes, if I hadn’t put on 2 stone over lockdown (so many reasons for that, a whole other story).

So, for me, it feels as though, in my head, proper weight loss won’t really start until I pass the 30lb down stage which at least I can see in the near future.

Feelings wise, I’m not missing food and I don’t think I’m feeling hungry ... although at times I do feel a bit ‘empty’ - a drink fixes that so it could be how thirst manifests itself also.

Mentally, I find myself thinking about how I got to a BMI of 40 in the first place & how I can change my reactions to the emotions driving the destructive behaviours. I’m also discussing it with my DH (who isn’t the worlds most sensitive man BY ANY MEANS but really wants to help me on this journey). It’s early days but I feel optimistic I can get a proper handle on this moving forward.

Anyway, off to get an iced coffee & enjoy the sunshine, happy Friday all!

Good luck everyone 😊. It has been life changing for DH. He was going to lose his job due to his weight and also he couldn't have knee surgery before losing weight, so overall v positive

MonkeysandParrots - thank you so much for continuing to share how you're feeling. A whole week and you're doing so well

Sofas - I'm so shocked you managed to drink 2 beers and whiskey - can't imagine being able to tolerate the volume of all that - I was thinking I'd have to give up beer as it's so gassy

@lauriefairycake two small bottles of beer not pints! I went into the op knowing I may never be able to have gassy drinks ever again. Been lucky although I burp a LOT. And have to pour it into a glass first. Three drinks plus water over five hours.

Everyone tells you to avoid alcohol. I was never going to manage that.

One thing I do do is avoid drinking anything at all after eating for 30-45 minutes. I stick to this religiously
. Makes me feel nauseous and can give you the shits. Pushes the food through your tummy too quickly. Not only can it make you feel sick but also means you might not stay as full for long. I know someone who ignores this but they also ignore all the other rules too - they haven't lost as much weight as they could have done.

I'm the same, no way I'm giving up my gin and light tonic, ice and lemon

A couple of days a week I skip dinner and drinks 2 guns and a couple of packets of snack a jacks

monkeys thank you for the update. Can I ask you a question please? Do you think you would have been able to travel for say 10-12 hours a few days after surgery or do think that's crazy?

I am still hemming and hawing over where to go based on price and I have to decide soon or the appointments will be gone...