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Weight loss chat

A space to talk openly about weight loss journeys and challenges. Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. You may wish to speak to a medical professional before starting any diet.

Contemplating bariatric surgery.... advice?

999 replies

Seriouslyconfused3 · 08/05/2020 09:06

Hi as the title states I am contemplating a gastric sleeve. I am a serial yo yo dieter and my metabolism is fucked. I have pcos and have tried Xenical, saxenda etc- successful until I stop using and the weight piles back on.

I’ve seen an endocrinologist and he said that, in his opinion, sometimes surgery is the only viable option. I’d be paying for it myself as I don’t quite meet the nhs criteria yet.

I’m miserable- I don’t lose weight unless I starve myself ie 600 calories a day and then I’m even more unhappy. I’m worried about my health in the long term, but then the prospect of surgery scares me too.

Any advice from those who have been there before?

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Veganforlife · 17/07/2020 17:14

Ah shit
Sorry guys ,just read the thread and I realise this is a supportive group now .
Good luck ,hope it all goes well

PasstheBucket89 · 17/07/2020 17:18

sorry to just but in, so can you have no sugar ever again after BS?

Hoggleludo · 17/07/2020 17:28

Friend of mine had it done. The surgery

I haven't rtft. But she said it was the worst thing she's ever done. She's been left with life long life threatening issues. Which were all brought in by the surgery. So whilst she's (only) slightly slimmer. She's more unhappy as the problems are horrific. She's on Facebook as she's tried to let people know what can and does go wrong.

Hiddenmnetter · 17/07/2020 17:59

I had a gastric sleeve about 18 months ago. I paid for it privately because I was seriously obese, BMI of nearly 40. I had variously been normal and over weight, but had never managed to maintain a normal weight. Due to the nature of my (shift) work I have a sedentary lifestyle, accompanied by very irregular meal patterns. I also was a habitual eater: not because I was hungry but because I was bored or tired and wanted something to do. I also enjoyed the sensation of being full, so often overrate (3* huge portions per meal).

So I had the sleeve and I won't sugarcoat it- the first 3 months were AWFUL. I thought I had made the biggest mistake of my life, I was initially in pain, but then it was constant discomfort. However, once I started to adapt my eating patterns, and got used to taking the various pills I needed to, I got used to it. They the weight melted off me. I went from 127 kgs at my maximum to 68. I've now put back on a bit of weight (I love and am still able to consume vast quantities of crisps), but it's slow and manageable if I control myself for a few weeks at a time.

Now 18 months on, I am unable to eat a full meal of carbs- pasta, potato, rice, etc I can eat but only very small quantities. The same for meat. I find curries the easiest to eat- I eat a lot of chickpea and lentil curries. I can eat chicken if it's thigh- breast is too dry. Red meats I can eat but only in very small quantities- although mince is ok. To clarify- it's not takeaway curries which are too high on fat content.

To give you an accurate picture- if I make curry and rice, I will have 2 large tablespoons of cooked rice for a meal, with lots of sauce. It will take me around 90-120 minutes to eat that meal (I find eating at work much easier). It makes family meals difficult, and I often serve myself a small portion and then don't really eat, but just to sit at the table and talk to my family. So the takeaway is that small portions of normal meals still take a long time to eat.

If I eat very high fat content foods I am sick. If I eat too fast, I'm sick. If I eat too much, I'm sick. So basically the surgery has had the consequence that I'm far more cautious about how much I eat, and I eat far slower, and am far more sensitive to the sensation of being full- the second I feel a little full, I stop until it passed (often 20-30 minutes). This ensures I'm not sick.

The result now is that I tend to make much better quality meals than I used to. I make curries from scratch (because I like them and they go down easiest, and because I'm autistic and like eating the same thing over and over- drives my wife mental to come home to curry again). I eat food I like, rather than eating cause it's there, because I essentially don't feel hungry any more (the Dr said that by cutting away more than 80% of my stomach he had essentially removed my ability to feel hunger- any hunger I felt was psychological). I have lost all the weight I need to and now sit smack bang in the middle of the healthy weight range. My knees don't hurt, I can run when I want to, I have the energy for major projects (recently built a 30 m2 deck). I think the surgery was, on balance, the right thing to do, however I won't deny that when I'm not paying attention and then overeat, the sensation of nausea rising and spending 30-40 minutes wondering if I will vomit, and eventually having to dash to be sick is horrible. It makes meals out hard work, and I can only really go a few places to eat. But I've lost a lot of weight on top of quitting smoking, so the two major cancer risk factors have been removed, which means I stand a much better chance of seeing my daughter's grow up, and being with my wife for a long time.

Seriouslyconfused3 · 17/07/2020 18:26

Wow that was so interesting @Hiddenmnetter always good to have real insights from those who have been there before! If you could do it again would you?

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Seriouslyconfused3 · 17/07/2020 18:27

No worries @Veganforlife it started out as an advice thread Initially and has turned into a support group Smile

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MonkeysandParrots · 17/07/2020 18:28

Thanks everyone for sharing the bad as well as the good. For me, I’m happy to move ahead having considered the risks but appreciate that’s not the right call for everyone.

IAintentDead · 17/07/2020 18:46

I had a gastric bypass in 2000. Only about 100 people in the UK had had it done before.

I have never regretted it. I lost weight for the first year and got down to a BMI of around 26. Since then my weight still fluctuates depending mostly on how active I am. It's up at the moment to a BMI of around 30. The lowest I got to was 23.

I feel best in terms of balance around 26 though, it is a constant struggle when I'm any lower than that, even with my reduced diet.

Mostly vegetarian these days, I don't not eat meat I just rarely cook it as more than a couple of ounces is a challenge to digest even after 20 years and as I live alone it's too much faff to cook it often. Fish, cheese and eggs are all fine though so I get plenty of protein.

You do need to watch your vitamins and minerals. I became very anaemic at one point. I take iron, vit C, vit D3, vit K2 and magnesium daily and have monthly B12 injections.

I am healthier now at 65 than I was pre op at 45.

IAintentDead · 17/07/2020 18:47

Oh, and the full bypass operation was £8000 back in 2000

PasstheBucket89 · 17/07/2020 21:03

Sorry to ask the question again, but if you was to have like a slice of birthday cake on your birthday, you would shake vomit and have diahorrea? or do just have to just be careful?

Hiddenmnetter · 18/07/2020 04:41

@Seriouslyconfused3 yes I would. No doubt in the end that the good far outweighs the bad. I would generally advocate that people have the surgery, but always, always with their eyes open to the downsides. This is not something that can be undone. If you have emotional problems that you eat, they will still need dealing with post surgery (and I have read many examples of people bypassing their surgery by, for instance, sucking roast potatoes). Then it is just a £9k money pit in which you have made one is life's great pleasures very difficult for yourself.

My surgeon recommended the sleeve, but did say if in 2 years time the weight didn't stay off, then the next step is the bypass, and the consequences of the bypass were far harder to evade (dumping syndrome etc). And the bypass is forever. You will get dumping syndrome if you eat too fast, eat the wrong food etc etc. He said that once is enough, you never endure it twice it's so horrible.

SeriouslyRetro · 18/07/2020 22:39

I think speaking as someone who’s really considering going for gastric surgery, is how much of my life/enjoyment/happiness can centre on food, and how it’s probably the same for other obese people. When I hear about the negatives, it’s a lot of the time because they can no longer find comfort, solace or happiness in the food they once considered their oldest friend. It’s psychologically such a mountain to climb.

Seriouslyconfused3 · 19/07/2020 14:19

Well I’m one step closer- pre op done (over the phone), next steps are blood tests and the COVID test (which is the one I’m nervous of being positive).

How’s everyone else getting on?

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Seriouslyconfused3 · 19/07/2020 14:20

@SeriouslyRetro I’ve definitely found that during the lrd! It’s made me realise how dependant on food I was for everything

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MonkeysandParrots · 19/07/2020 16:10

@Seriouslyconfused3 I’m on day 3 of the LRD, just getting on with it, not my favourite thing but keep reminding myself it’s a means to an end.

It’s interesting about our Individual relationship with food, I’ve heard it mentioned that we go through a grieving process after wls as the food relationship inevitably changes which makes sense to me.

I also think some of it is habitual, I know I eat, for instance, when I’m bored or just sitting in front of the TV. So I’ve decided to teach myself how to knit so my hands are busy and I’m concentrating on that rather than thinking about crisps, I hope that works 😝

I’m sure your Covid test will be fine, have you been self isolating? When is it?

LaurieFairyCake · 19/07/2020 16:20

I had an online appointment 2 weeks ago for a sleeve gastrectomy and I'm now waiting for my follow up camera down throat thingy - I'm going to be paying privately

Seriouslyconfused3 · 19/07/2020 16:39

Have to book the COVID test for Thursday or Friday. I have been self isolating but this COVID business makes me nervous. Knitting is a good idea- I’ve been reading a lot more.

@LaurieFairyCake that sounds like you’re making progress. Do you suffer with reflux? Is that why the camera?

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LaurieFairyCake · 19/07/2020 17:55

No reflux, he just said they have a look round the stomach to check I don't have cancer before they cut it off Grin

I thought everyone had it ?

Seriouslyconfused3 · 19/07/2020 19:52

@LaurieFairyCake no idea? I’m getting some bloods taken but no one has mentioned anything else

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MonkeysandParrots · 19/07/2020 22:44

@LaurieFairyCake no mention of this by my consultant either, just pre med bloods taken.

LaurieFairyCake · 20/07/2020 18:16

I've had my estimate of costs for the surgery and it's £16,650

That's quite a lot

SeriouslyRetro · 20/07/2020 18:54

I think an endoscopy is pretty standard before gastric surgery, although I’ve heard of some people having it right before the surgery itself.

£16,650. Ouch! That’s pretty prohibitive isn’t it; have you considered going abroad?

MonkeysandParrots · 20/07/2020 19:15

@LaurieFairyCake Crikey, that’s 60% higher than I’m paying for a sleeve in Bristol. Have you had more than one quote?

LaurieFairyCake · 20/07/2020 19:26

Oh god I assumed that was standard price for England Shock

Could you PM me Monkey with the name of your hospital/surgeon if you feel able to?

LaurieFairyCake · 20/07/2020 19:41

I didn't know different hospitals charged different prices