I was asked the dreaded question

[myusernameisnotmyusername]

Hi all. Yesterday was my birthday and we went out for a walk around a NT property. I was wearing a summer dress from last year and I know I've put on a few pounds but was utterly horrified to be asked by this lady 'when is your baby due'. I have been trying to see the funny side but keep going over and over it in my head. I guess I need a kick up the backside but at 5,4 and 13 stone I didn't think it was that bad. I think I just need to vent but I also want to know where to start. I've done slimming world in the past and lost 3 stone but I know a lot of people who struggle to keep it off.

I'm not sure how it's rude though. I'm currently (very) pregnant and people ask me when I'm due. This lady thought you were pregnant and asked... she wasn't being rude. Unless you think she was really being passive aggressive about your weight (which I doubt).

Robot I sort of agree however the assuming is fairly rude

And although she isn't aware of this I was just about to start my period so quite bloated and have been trying to have a second baby for many years so even though she doesn't know any of this it's quite rude to say it. I only stroked her flipping dog!

I had the same situation about a month ago except this person said it in front of several work colleagues......I laughed it off and then went home and cried about it - I'm on medication for ivf which is making me bloated and lost 3 pregnancies in the last 18 months. Really wish people would think before they ask a question like that! I think even if someone had I'm pregnant tattooed on their forehead I wouldn't ask them in case I embarrassed them/me!

That being said it is a bit of a wake up call and I'm going to go back to healthy eating and try and lose a bit of weight ready for summer x

Wow, that is astonishingly rude!

I never ever ask such questions until I know for sure they are actually pregnant.

Oh miracle I really feel for you. That's not nice at all.

Don't get me wrong I wouldn't be happy if somebody thought I was pregnant when I'm not. And I don't think I'd ask when somebody was due either unless I knew for sure.

I've gained a ton of weight this pregnancy (and definitely not just my bump) and it's getting me down already. Starting to think about the diet (and eventually) exercise changes I need to make to get back to my original weight.

Really I just need to limit eating to when I'm actually hungry rather than just eating because I fancy something and focus more on eating lots of veg, fruit, nuts, fish etc and cut out some of the chocolate and ice cream! I am a firm believer in not 'dieting' and eating as you mean to go on, so a slow sustainable approach. I'm giving myself a year to get back to my old weight and I'm expecting to have 10+ kg to lose.

It's very rude and ignorant to assume someone is pregnant if they have not said as much.

Just as it is very rude to ask people when they are going to have their first or next baby.

It has happened to me OP more than once and it's rude and hurtful.

Don't let a rude and ignorant person spoil your day. Half of the uk population is overweight so it's hardly unusual to struggle with your weight. I think you should congratulate yourself on progress made in managing your anxiety and continue to make steps to increase your well being which could include increasing exercise and making some healthy changes to your diet.

Your dc will tell you that you look gorgeous and I'm sure they are right. We need to love our bodies right her and right now. You are amazing OP and it's a shame that person didn't say this to you instead of commenting on a non existent' pregnancy.

I did dwell on it... I do need to lose weight...

Oh snog that's some lovely things to say. Thank you.

Didn't mean to be offensive OP but according to bmi you are considered obese.

I'm not far behind you, so am calorie counting, keeping the carbs low and exercising 4 times a week. Fed up with my clothes not fitting.