I just can't do it - anyone else?

[FartBlossom]

Bit of a moan here, I can't lose weight. Well I can, I lose a bit then give up. How on earth do people lose weight? I know I know its all in the food, with a bit of exercise to help a bit more, but its mainly eating the right things.

Im 12st 5, size 14-16, 5'5. I have a big belly which makes me look pregnant. Ive always looked pregnant even before children.

Ive started running, Ive been doing it for the last 6 weeks, but I know I need to work on my diet. Its just not happening though. Im slowly putting on the pounds. Im happy to be a size 14, but I can feel myself getting bigger. I just can't stop eating junk. What really works? Ive tried SW, but without going to meetings I can't seem to follow it very easy and I can't go to meetings as I can't afford it. Ive tried calorie counting, but a lot of things I seem to eat I haven't the foggiest how much is in them (like the cottage pie we had for tea tonight).

Sorry I dont really know what the point in my post is apart from to just have a moan about my weight. DH doesn't understand (he's not exactly thin himself, but doesnt care) and thinks I don't need to watch my food intake, but if I dont watch it Im just putting on weight. I dont have many close friends I can talk to about this and just want to moan about how I long to be slimmer, but its just not happening. Is it this hard for everybody? Will I be battling with this for the rest of my life? Am I just having a hard couple of days now the scales have just tipped over the 12st 5 mark?

Have you though of the Low Carb way of eating (woe) look in this topic for Bootcamp thread.

Ive seen the bootcamp threads, what is the bootcamp? I couldn't make head or tail of what it actually was.

Have you tried My Fitness Pal? It's available as an app or you can use it's website.

Basically you input your details, it works out a daily allowance and all you then do is log everything you eat. It tells you the calorie content of the foods you eat - not just branded stuff, you could put in your cottage pie recipe for example and it will calculate how many calories your portion contained.

I've lost almost a stone in 6 weeks using it, it's free and as long as I log everything (even on a bad day lol) it gives me the motivation I need! Definitely worth a look, there's a long running thread on this board with lots of users on.

Ive seen that thread in active convo's every now and again. Ive tried food focus which I believe is similar and failed there. Is My fitness pal better then? I can't use an app as I dont have the technology, but I can look at the website. I found food focus to be a bit of a chore to be honest, but I suppose trying to lose weight is hard work in itself.

i feel your pain. once upon a time, i could diet without fail, but i was so vein back then! now although i am still vein, im not soooo vein that i am prepared to suffer for very long....

i am now 10st 8 where as 7 years ago i was 8st 7. i am a size 14 and am pissed off but not enough to stick to a diet properly, and everyone seems to want to sabotage me these days...

i am starting again tomorrow. i have bought weight watchers meals and some frozen veg. its not very inventive but i am back to work (shifts) tomorrow and i find it doubly hard to do when im working.

so its going to be cereal for breakfast.
fruit for mid morning if needed
turkey sandwich for lunch / fat free yoghurt
prawn linguine for tea and then when i leave work tomorrow night i will have 1 slimline gin and tonic instead of the usual couple of glasses of wine.

then bed.

ive gone running again today for the first time in about a month - am going to try to go 3 times a week and build up my mileage again.

i only want to lose about 10lb to be happy - im never going to weigh 8st again and thats fine - but i do think sometimes you need to be in totally the right frame of mind to do it and i know when im not....

but i have works do to go to in june and am determined to get into a certain dress which requires a weight loss of around half a stone....

so here we go again.
wine is my downfall so i am not buying any.

Just thinking about it and I wonder if I dont do so well when my life is going through a boring stage. ATM we're just ticking along going about our day to day life. That and maybe Im just feeling that way out at the moment. Will look at my fitness pal tomorrow (no point in doing it today now its almost over) and see if its any better than food focus.

My downfall is biscuits, cake and chocolate. That along with not loving healthy food (eg salad, fruit, veg etc). I can eat healthily, but it doesn't exactly fill me with excitment. Whereas, a choc chip muffin and a brownie with a hot choc mmmmmmmm

Whereas, a choc chip muffin and a brownie with a hot choc mmmmmmmm

Whoops I meant to say a choc chip muffin or a brownie, not and

fartblossom, hi there.
I've recently lost a stone and since then I've just wanted to eat and eat and eat and eat. I'm a choc chip muffin AND and brownie and hot choc kinda gal.

It's like I'm programmed to not help myself! It took me ages to lose a stone, and I still have another 1.5 stone to go but I'm on self destruct at the moment.

Just wanted to say hello and that you're not alone.

Low carb. Its cuts the cravings. Dukan or Atkins - whichever suits you best.

Low carb can be very successful, I tried it but it's just not for me. I don't like salad enough lol! However, I have cut out White carbs (no bread, pasta or potatoes), limit myself to one slice of wholemeal bread per day and I don't eat biscuits or cakes. I eat protein and veg only for my evening meal and I always leave enough calories over for a snack once the kids are in bed!

I can't praise My Fitness Pal highly enough tbh, I've done weightwatchers numerous times as I need the structure but find logging everything on mfp just as effective. I have had a couple of blowouts over the 6 weeks I've been doing this but I still logged everything and just cut back for a few days afterwards.

I am half a pound off my target weight now and need to look into how I maintain without gaining but I'm so glad for MN as I'd never heard of mfp before coming on here.

Oh and just to give you an idea of how much my eating habits have changed in such a short space of time - before, I rarely ate meals. I grazed all day on crap. Biscuits, cake, chocolate. Now, I eat 3 proper meals a day, don't go near the biscuit tin and only eat 85% cocoa choc. I nicked a bit of ds' choc the other day and it tasted awful, I've got used to the bitterness of mine and allow myself a square a day which I nibble at! I never thought I could do that!

Just wondering what you struggle with about SW? I went to one meeting got the books and then just did it myself. The monthly slimming world magazine is full of great recipes and the counting system is easy. I made my own version of the little sheets you record your food on every day and then you can clearly see when you've eaten your A and B choices and when you need not stick to the unlimited foods of you're still hungry. I also find simply not buying the food not included in the SW programme helps me. I always have lots of snack type food around which fits the allowances. Good luck

Look, pretty much everyone who's overweight got that way because they prefer chocolate to salad - that's not an excuse

Low carb will cut your sweet cravings. SW won't. Any diet (imo) that allows you to eat lots of pasta, bread, fruit, low-fat sugary yoghurt etc is setting you up to fail in the medium to long term, because it's not dealing with the real issues - how your body actually handles the food you eat, what makes you hungry, why you crave foods, why you eat junk.

Plus, you don't have to pay for meetings or count calories or any of that dull stuff.

This is the first Bootcamp thread. We're now on Week 6 but you can join anytime. Have a good read of the rules, weigh in on the Week 6 Weigh In thread and ENJOY

I've recently lost 2st (took me 20 weeks - 1.5lbs each week on average) and there's no way I'm going back. Sadly, weight loss is not all about exercising and eating all the right foods...you have to be in the frame of mind to want to lose weight in the first place. I wasn't ready until January this year so I just ate what ever I wanted until then. Then it was crunch time, and I've been mentally focused ever since. Hypnotherapy has also been a huge help to me. If you are not mentally in the right place, you will find it hard to keep the weight off.

lovechoc totally agree. You have to want to lose weight to actually lose weight. I've spent weeks thinking about weight loss but it's only now that I actually want to do it that it's coming off!! Always low carb for me - I know it works and the best thing, for me, is that it does curb my appetite so I'm not missing sweet, refined food. I was the same with smoking - knew I had to give it up but until I was actually ready to give it up it was never going to happen! Would giving yourself a target or a deadline shake you up enough to lose weight? If not, wait til you really are ready and enjoy the muffins in the meantime :)

You have to want to lose weight to actually lose weight

Thats probably my problem, I dont want to lose it enough. Id want to, but not enough. Im not in the right frame of mind ATM, but I dont like seeing my weight creep up. It is creeping slowly, but still going the wrong way. How do you get into that frame of mind?

The low carbs thing creates a problem as I just can't live without pasta. My favourite food is anything italian and its a meal that the whole family loves to eat so its just easy to have pasta a couple of times a week. Ive tried to cut down on bread, but only by having a wrap when I have a sandwich. Potatoes (sp?) always feature a couple of times a week too.

well said tea
I am another who advocates low carb. Low carbing gets rid of your cravings. I used to do weight watchers but I always had a sweet tooth and would spend my points on chocolate and cream cakes, not just a cream cake but a full pack to myself with a dairy milk chaser. I have been low carbing since feb. Yes, the first week is the hardest as you detox from the carbs and is a point that many give up but when you finish that first week your energy levels rise, you are not bloated, you sleep better, you no longer have blood sugar highs and lows and you don't crave sweet stuff because you are then burning your own body fat. Ok, if sweet stuff is an emotional crutch, then that is a different thing to break but if you listen to your body, it won't be wanting any.
I can now walk down the cake and choc aisles in tesco and not even have a glimmer of desire, it's just meh.

The food is also delicious. You get some carbs from healthy sources like veg and salad but these can be dressed in full fat ceaser dressing, oil, or butter on your veg. You can eat creamy sauces, cook in butter and oil, eat full fat cheese not plasticy half fat shite.

The other thing with low carb is that your body shape and composition changes in a different way 9for the better) than if you are doing low cal/low fat. Also I would advise doing some resistance work, weights etc, not just concentrating on running. You need to build muscle to increase your resting metabolic rate which will then burn fat as you sleep

Yeah, yeah, yeah, love pasta, can't live without potatoes, blah blah blah, heard it all before .

Am teasing, btw. The idea of 'giving up' carbs is a scary one and everyone makes these excuses before they start. Do you really think those of us who eat low-carb now didn't like Italian food before? Lasagne? Pizza? Butternut squash risotto, anyone? Of course we did - but it's what made us put on weight too!

My ds is a pastaholic and my dp inhales Dairy Milk on a daily basis - guess what? These days I think pasta tastes a bit weird and Dairy Milk is waaaaaaay too sweet and sickly. Food on low-carb is amazing and all it takes is minor adjustments to family meals to make it work for everyone.

Right now, you might not be in the right place, mentally. That's fair enough. But have a read of the low-carb boards, and have a think about it. You sound pretty miserable tbh - the boards are a great source of support too (well, when BIWI doesn't get too shouty that is ).

Good luck...

You need to build muscle to increase your resting metabolic rate which will then burn fat as you sleep

Ive considered doing 30 day shred along with running as I can feel the difference in my legs, but do realise I am neglecting my upper body. The thing is I run every other day and its bad to exerise too much isnt it? especially if you're not used to it.

Im just making excuses aren't I.

At the moment Im in that depressive cycle, where I realise what I should do to lose weight, but really really dont want to so then think its not going to happen, feel bad so eat naughty foods.

How do I diet/watch my food when DH just rolls his eyes every time?

I think I need to forget about it for a while until Im ready and right now Im not sure I am, but I just dont like this fat feeling I have right now.

Oh and when I said you sound miserable I meant about your weight gain, not that you're a grumpy so-and-so, just to clarify! [foot-in-mouth]

crossed posts there tea

DH does the shopping and cooking and there is no way I can ask him to leave out carbs, its just not going to happen.

crossed posts again, I realise what you mean. I am happy with every other aspect of my life, perhaps my weight gaining is just giving my life some balance. Or so I can tell myself.

This is avery interesting and inspirational thread. I see myself in a lot of what you have written Fartblossom.

I'm feeling really down about my weight and my inability to stick to any sort of diet or eating plan but I think I may have to look seriously at low carb. I've bookmarked lots of stuff on it in the past but never really given it a go.
I have horrible cravings that I can't seem to get rid of and I'm sure they are caused by wheat (I love bread and pasta and cakes and biscuits) and sugar - I love sweets too - chocolate and things like wine gums sweets too. I can't seem to stay away from them and can scoff them in huge amounts.
I feel like I've tried everything...but as I said, low carb is something I've never really tried. Maybe it's time.

On the SW thing. I'm not knocking it completely, but for some of us it's not the best way. When I used to do Green days I'd have piles and piles of pasta and a huge jacket potato and never felt fully satisfied. All those carbs seemed to make me even more hungry and I ate for England. Won't surprise anyone to know that I didn't do the Red days, because I wanted permission to eat carbs in large amounts. I think it's changed now and you can mix both red and green on the same day, maybe that works better.

What I want is a way to lose weight that helps me cut my cravings, and is something I can maintain long term, as I certainly dont want to put in all the hard work for weight loss - 5st in my case- and then regain it all and more.
Sorry I've made this all about me, just need to get it out because it's making me feel really low currently. Dreading the summer because I'm so fat...

How about if for my evening meals I still eat the same things, but not as much. Would that work?

Im talking about carbs BTW. Tonight its fish and mash for tea. How about if I dont have as much mash as usual?

Im not going to be able to give up pasta or potatoes at all. So what if I cut them down a lot?

DH organises a lot of meals and there is no way he will get rid of carbs. He is no encouragement whatsoever so I need something else. MN is the best place I can think of.

malory With SW you can do the extra easy plan where everything that is syn free on one plan is syn free every day. I did lose a stone before doing that, but once I stopped going to meetings it went back up. I stopped going because in the end I would go, get weighed and sit there listen to whatever the leader had to say and go home. I didnt talk to anyone, no-one talked to me so it worked out I was paying £5 a week just to weigh myself and I couldn't justify that.

I just feel so crap about it ATM.

It's difficult if your partner is unsupportive, definitely. Does he know how unhappy you feel with your weight gain?

You don't have to ask him to cut the carbs in his cooking altogether - just to not put them on your plate, maybe? That's what we do - last night I cooked Chinese pork and veg, just with a few noodles for the non-low-carbers. If we have eg steak, I do a ton of veg and then add chips for those that want them.

Smaller portions would help, I guess, if you really can't avoid the carbs, eg if he's cooked pasta.