Weight re-gain please don't judge me, I need your advice

[Theysucceededintheend]

Feeling deeply ashamed of myself right now.
Lost 4 stone with MJ between June 2024 to February 2026. I'm a very slow loser, but I persevered, worked hard, spent a foooooortune, and finally achieved the weight loss I needed to get to BMI 25. I went from clinically obese BMI to healthy BMI.
My doses went from 2.5mg to 15mg of MJ.
I stopped in February due to cost. I wanted to continue on a low dose to maintain my new BMI, but couldn't afford to. All I needed to do was maintain, so I thought I'll have to do it through new healthy habits and willpower.
Mistake.
Big, big mistake.
Through March and April, I have rapidly regained 1.5 stone back in weight. And bloody hell has it piled back on fast. And it has ALL gone to my abdomen and middle of my back. Like a huge round hard ball of fat, 20 pounds of fat, in a ball shape around my abdomen and back.
I am so uncomfortable.
What's weird is that before I lost any weight, I was 'big all over' if that makes sense. The 4 stone in fat was just evenly distributed all over my body.
And when I lost the 4 stone, it came off me in the same even distribution. I was thinner all over.
But this 20 pounds I've regained has ONLY accumulated around my abdomen and middle back.
My legs and bum and arms remain thin.
And it's rock solid hard fat around my abdomen. It's not soft, squidgy, wobbly abdominal fat, my abdomen is hard and distended. Why is that?! I thought fat was soft and jiggly?
I look like a toffee apple.
It's so uncomfortable!!!!
And the other thing that's weird, is that if it's true that you have to consume an additional 3,500 calories on top of your baseline calorie requirement to gain 1 pound in weight, then I can't work out what the hell is going on, because there is no way whatsoever that I have consumed an additional 70,000 calories over the past 8 weeks on top of my baseline maintenance calorie requirement.
Apparently I need 1,700 calories to maintain, based on online TDEE calculations. And that's setting my activity as sedentary, which I'm not, I'm always on the go and very rarely sit down.
So, 1,700 calories daily (to maintain weight) over 8 weeks (56 days) = 95,200 calories
Plus apparently 70,000 EXTRA calories over 8 weeks (56 days) is
95,200 + 70,000 = 165,200 calories allegedly eaten over 8 weeks/56 days.
This equals 2,950 calories eaten every day for 56 days straight.
Sorry, but no.
I simply haven't eaten nearly 3,000 calories daily every day for 56 consecutive days. Nor have I eaten more than this on some days and less on others. I've still carried on tracking on myfitnesspal for the past 8 weeks and I haven't gone over 2,000 calories on any day whatsoever. That's with weighing and measuring everything. And a really busy life with an active job for my work 5 days a week, busy parenting, daily houseworking, walking miles every week, I've spent a week decorating, I spent the Easter holidays walking 20,000 steps daily over the peak district for a week. I have not been sedentary. And I have not eaten more than 2,000 calories daily.
So how have I gained 20 pounds in 8 weeks?
And why is it rock solid weight around my abdomen like a giant football?
So help. I'm panicking. What should I do????
MJ too expensive now.
I was on 15mg and I can't pay the new increased prices for that dose anymore.
And EVERYTHING I read about switching to Wegovy says it's useless, does nothing, no weight loss.
Help.
I'm actually crying.
It took me months to lose my final stone and now it's thundered back onto me plus more in 8 weeks.
I spent my whole childhood with my mum and dad telling me I was fat and thst they were ashamed of how fat I was.
I felt ashamed of myself all my life growing up. My mum would shout at me for being fat when I was a little girl. My dad would call me out and shame me for being fat always in front of other adults all through my childhood, my pre-teen and my teenage years. But I look back at photos of myself as a child at those ages and I wasn't fat at all. I was normal. In fact I looked lovely, looking back with adult eyes. But I thought I looked terrible.
My DD is 12 and oh my God I would never in a trillion years tell her she's fat. I mean she isn't fat, but neither was I as a child her age. But even if she were, I would never say the things to her that my parents said to me. I don't understand why they did. I remember my dad marching me to a chemist and making me stand on weighing scales aged 12 then announcing my weight loudly in the chemist then walking behind me all the way home sneering at me, looking my body up and down with disgusted eyes, stating loudly how fat I was, how heavy I was, repeating what weight I was, all in front of his new wife and his 3 step children all older than me. He didn't stop all the way home. I have a photo from that day, after the walk of shame, back at his new splendid house, taken by his new wife with her children. I look at it now and my 12 year old face looks so upset. And I wasn't fat. Not even puppy fat. Just nothing.
But I'm fat now.
And I was so triumphant when I lost 4 stone and got slim again.
And now 8 weeks later I'm fat again. And deeply ashamed for regaining so much weight.
And I can't afford the new MJ prices.
And I don't know what to do.
I need help.

It sounds like it would be worth visiting the doctor to determine that it is in fact weight gain (considering what you've said about how uncomfortable it makes you, and that it is new for you to feel hard and distended)

Please try not to beat yourself up. You have done nothing wrong. You are just working out what works for you long term x

I did the same op and swore I never would. Came off mounjaro around January due to cost and wanting to keep going myself but have gained around 2 stone back 😬 still doing lots of walking and had a few treats for birthdays and trips away but not eating to excess as much as before. In that time I’ve found out my thyroid is severely underactive again. However I’ve now started to give wegovy a go since it’s cheaper and I’m on week 2 and have lost 4lb. Slower progress but hoping with the cost it will be more sustainable. I lost lots with mounjaro initially and then stalled but it’s to easy to see how people put so much on when you stop. Despite continuing my high protein and high fibre I was sooo hungry when I stopped so I can see why some people wish to be on it for life to maintain

Do you think the hard feelings you describe in your stomach could be water retention? It's worth going to see your GP.

You have done nothing to be ashamed of. You have a medical condition, took medication to address it but it isn't a cure and so when you no longer took it your condition worsened.

I would say you should go to the Dr too. Have you had blood tests, diabetes tests, etc? That is an odd regain pattern and you need to check everything is OK.

You also need help to maintain your weight. Maybe the gp can suggest something or you could look at some of the less costly appetite suppressents.

I'm so sorry. It's not your fault at all.

I would definitely go to the GP as it seems an unusual way to regain the weight. It’s worth ruling out any other causes.

Sorry to hear that op
the dreaded weight gain and the cost of even maintaining the dose is awful

most of the people I know ( myself included) get it “ unofficially “ to lose weight and maintain it

shouldn’t have to but plenty do because the cost is prohibitive for many

How old are you op? As my friend describes her pre menopausal weight gain as a pad on her stomach. Otherwise slim.

The purpose of the injections is to address exactly the issue you had, and it did for as long as you were on them. You have nothing to be ashamed of.

I’m sorry your parents ever treated you that way, and how it’s affecting the way you feel about yourself now. They are the problem, not you.

What you have is a practical problem of how to reduce back down to the level you were at without the help of the injections.

Can you return to the GP to ask for a prescription to a cheaper option than what you were on before?

If it makes you feel any better I have heard weight loss injections described as like using a car to get to your destination, instead of walking. Losing weight the hard way is like walking to your destination, it’s ok if you don’t have far to go but if you have a long way it is very difficult. The injections are like having a car, and while you know you can get to your destination on foot or in this case by dieting and exercising, it takes much longer and is much harder and if you had a car, you would get in the car and drive there. This puts it in a totally neutral light, no shame or blame involved.

What’s happened to you is your car ran out of petrol whilst going up a hill and slid back a bit further from your destination, and you don’t have any petrol so it will be hard going walking back up. Going back to the GP is like trying to find a cheaper fuel. Maybe it’s slower but you will still make more progress than walking.

I don’t have any advice r.e the weight gain but just to say please don’t be defined by how you were made to feel as a child. It’s awful that you had to experience that.

I would definitely second going to the GP to check that there isn’t another cause of the sudden weight gain, given how you’ve described how your stomach feels.

Then, I would consider trying Wegovy if that’s more affordable. It does work for people on average and there’s no reason to assume it wouldn’t work for you without trying it.

Three things stand out from your post. Firstly, I’d see the GP to rule out another cause for the gain, rock solid should be investigated. Secondly, you don’t mention your height or weight, but I’m 5ft 4 and mid-range BMI and I’d definitely put on weight at 1700 calories, I only need about 1200. Lastly, have you had counselling about your childhood? That was not alright and perhaps talking about it would help your relationship with food.

I think when you undereat for a long time your metabolism slows so you gain weight on much lower calories than you would have before. Could that be it?

Definitely see your GP, and I’m sorry if that comes across as rude, but are you constipated? Just wondering if it’s something like extra water and poop adding to some of that gain. Plus among the non serious symptoms for hard stomach can be constipation and gas

That doesn’t sound right - I’d see the doctor to rule out something else

It’s probably water weight and bloating too.
visit GPfor a check up and then water water water and cut out carbs for 2 weeks

Yes get checked by doctor - it sounds like fluid retention and maybe a problem with your kidneys.

Your parents sound awful im so so sorry you went through that.

With regards to the gain and pattern. I was on Mounjaro for around 10 months and I lost 2 stone. I came off about 6 months ago due to cost. I’ve put back on a stone of that weight, and it is all on my abdomen and under my arms. Such an odd proportion of large lumpy bits on my body that I never had before.
So I’m not sure it’s abnormal.

As others have said though maybe look at your calories again. I’m 1200 sedentary, 5’2”. I think I’m probably averaging about 1700 per day at the moment, hence the weight gain.

After stopping there is the possibility of some weight gain from appetite increase, water storage, bloating if diet has changed again which could be part of the stomach distention rather than an increase in fat.

No judgement, you are experiencing what we all worry about and may go through ourselves. Hopefully after the initial regain it will settle, but as others have said if it is uncomfortable and hard perhaps a check at the GPs would be worthwhile.

I just want to say...fuck your Dad.

Fat when irs shrinking is soft and squishy, when it’s growing fast it’s hard.

id also say speak to your doctor, a lump on your back is a concern,

Dear @Theysucceededintheend you have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. I'm so angry that you had to go through all of that growing up. God, Philip Larkin was right - they really do f* you up, some of them.

I'm not a healthcare professional, but based on what you've said, I'm pretty certain that you haven't gained 20 lbs of fat in 8 weeks. It will more than likely be a combination of water retention and inflammation. You haven't said how old you are, or what your diet (as in what sort of food you're eating) is like, but this is very common in women in their mid to late 40s.

I'm loathe to offer up any suggestions that may overwhelm you even further, but I've found some of Melissa Neill's free content very useful in terms of diet and exercise. I think some of her recommendations are somewhat unsustainable (1g of protein per pound of body weight is a LOT, as is 3-4 litres of water!), but the basis of her nutrition and exercise programmes are fairly sound.

You're already doing loads of good stuff - walking is GREAT and tracking is tedious as, but necessary. If I don't track every day, all Hell breaks loose (who are these amazing people who can eat 'intuitively' and stay the same weight???).

So, please, please step back from the destructive, self-loathing behaviour. Give yourself an almighty pat on the back for having lost so much and get yourself to the GP to see what else may be going on.

You're great and I'm proud of you. 😘

Thank you so much.
Your last sentence - nobody has ever said that to me in my life. It's made me tearful.

I'm 49, so fit the age range you've mentioned. I will look in to Melissa Neill. Thank you.

And I'll book a GP appointment. Thank you.😊

It should be 1g or protein per kg of body weight, not per lb,

I agree and that's what I aim for. Melissa advocates 1g of protein per pound of body weight, which is really, really hard to achieve (and expensive). However, I do like the fact that the calorie deficits she recommends are very sustainable and, she allows for carbs (of the complex variety) and the exercise schedule is very doable.

But you ARE great, my lovely - to lose 4 stone is a heck of an achievement! Be gentle with yourself and try not to panic about a wee bit of regain (and weight can be all sorts of things - water retention, glycogen, inflammation - not just fat).

You will get to the bottom of it with a little help and support. GP is a good start, as is getting enough sleep and focusing on nutritious foods that soothe and nurture your body. And keep walking - it's great for so many things, especially your mental health.

Sending you buckets of 💐💐💐 xx