Body image issues!

[Somethingsnapped]

I just wondered how other people are feeling about their body image during and after weight loss?

I've lost nearly 3 stone, going from a size 16/18 to a 12/14. I'm quite tall, and only about a stone (maximum) off goal now. It's just strange because I barely feel different really. When I was larger (after pregnancies, having previously been quite slim), I didn't really see myself as overweight/chubby. So photos always came as a surprise to me. But in the mirror I still saw myself as not that different to pre-baby me. Now I've lost weight, I just look as I saw myself before. Maybe because my basic shape doesn't change, I have the same curvy bits in relation to other bits, and in the mirror I have no frame of reference. So I look just the same.

When I try clothes on in shops, every time I manage to fit into a size 12, I just feel like there must be some mistake with the sizing. I just can't picture at all how I must look to other people now. It doesn't really matter. But when I was overweight, I didn't quite see myself that way, and now I'm reasonably slim for my height, I still think I look just the same as before my weight loss. How is everyone else feeling?

Yes I feel very similar to what you describe. I’ve been up and down between 10 something and just under 14 stone between various pregnancies and diets and often don’t feel I look that different. I’ve lost about 2 stone now but I don’t feel that different to how I did in the summer (when I was nearly 14 stone). Clothes were pretty uncomfortable then and are now baggy but not sure my body shape has changed much! I taken a few whole body shots along the way and I can see a bit of a difference there but it’s not dramatic. Weird!!

You probably look fairly similar to other people compared to how you did before if you are tall and your overall shape is the same. People are not very good at noticing change unless it’s a dramatic one.

In terms of you recognising the change, it will just take a while to integrate it into your sense of self. For ages I would look at size 14 clothes and think they were far too small and be surprised when they fitted me. Now it’s been a while that I’ve been this size, I see them as the expected size to fit me, and my old larger clothes sizes 18, 20, 22 seem far too large.

yes, absolutely. I had a total weight blindness and thought I just looked a little heavier, but otherwise normal weight. It was the photos that were for some weird reason really unflattering, I looked fine.
No I did not. I am absolutely horrified by some photos I didn't delete because I thought they were quite flattering.

And yes I am still amazed when I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror next to someone slim. Because often I'm slimmer than them. And yes to picking up items of clothing and thinking that no way will this teeny tiny thing fit, and then it does.

I saw a couple of photos from Summer 2024 and I honestly can't believe I actually looked that big. I knew I had put on weight but didn't think I looked as bad as that, I knew my face looked bloated and that wasn't a good look but the rest looked awful too. I haven't had any candid photos recently to compare. I can tell I have lost weight but I am not sure if I am still in denial as I look smaller than I did. I guess photos in the months to come will tell the truth!

I feel just like that too.

I only see it in photos. And I only feel it when I go somewhere and do something I haven’t done for months, like walk up a long staircase which I used to find tiring.

Don’t understand how the mini clothes fit on me.

Still see the same wobbly tummy in the mirror. I can see that my bottom has gone, tho, and my cheekbones are back.

I've lost 7 stone this year with MJ. 17 stone to 10. A size 18 to a size 10...it look a few stone for people to notice bit its all people bloody talk about now drives me mad! I dont often realise how slim i am untill i see pics of myself!

I have the dreaded pancake bum these days 🤣

I think many of us struggle with this, I got up to a size 18. I thought I looked fine in the mirror and the same as I always did at a size ten, don’t get me wrong I knew I was bigger, but I thought my shape was the same.

i couldn’t understand why I looked so big on the ring doorbell. Or why my face looked so round and bloated on photos, when everyone else looked as they did, and told myself it was just the camera.

now I am aware I’m slim at a size 8-10, but again don’t feel I look that different. However people think I look thin, I genuinely think this is due to the major difference, as after they’ve seen me a few times they don’t think this and in pictures I actually don’t look thin or even close to it, just a healthy weight.

it really does fuck with your mind.

my theory is:

we gain weight slowly, so we don’t see the change in ourselves, as from one day to the next, one week to the next or even one month to the next there is no major difference. So as it’s slow we don’t see it. If it had been several sizes over night, we would have been horrified.

and then the weight comes off relatively quickly; several months later and many of us are a few stone lighter. So we go back to looking like we already do in our minds,

but everyone else can see it very clearly.

I've lost 5 stone over 2 yrs and plateau ed for various relasons.

I feel no different in many ways and think the difference in appearance is negligible despite losing 1/3 of my body weight.

I still dont find it easy to wear things / pick things from my wardrobe.

Im 42 and my body has really changed shape (my waistline is questionable) and I don't know what to do with it / how to dress myself

@SalmonOnFinnCrisp yes I'm struggling with this as well, as even when slim, I had a curvy body and big boobs, so I dressed for that. Now I have somehow lost the boobs and backside, and waistline is slim, but still quite wide. I have no idea how to dress for that.

How do you feel in photos now though OP? Well done on your loss! I bet you do look really different. 12 is a world away from an 18.

Mine always goes flat with weight loss but I’ve been doing squats and weights for 6 months and it’s popped out!

OMG yes, totally recognise everything you and others have said so far! I’ve lost 23kg and gone from 16-18 down to 12-14 and it feels like a mistake that those clothes fit now 😂 I’m also tall and seemed to carry my weight evenly all over, even at my biggest I didn’t have a massive stomach in proportion to the rest of me. People keep commenting now how much weight I’ve lost but I don’t think I look that different.
Photos tell a different story however!

Yes my boob's just minded their business as a B cup ...now somehow they atill look the same nude but woth clothes on want to sit lower and splay outward(?) Theres a lot in my armpit for some reason?

I was a classic pear with small waist and a big bum and i know how to dress for that - this new body is a mystery.
I think it's mostly kids and hitting 40 that has done that.

I also dont think i look slim in photos (but I am still about 1 stone over top healthy bmi)

It’s funny with the photos - there’s one from a wedding back in 2023 which I love - I was just over 13 stone (which is the cusp of obese BMI for me) but had just come down from nearly 14 stone after a couple of months with a personal trainer, and felt great.

But there are photos of me from a trip to New York 15 years ago also at just over 13 stone that I still can’t bear to look at!! Then I’d gained a stone in the last 6 months, was pretty much the biggest I’d ever been then (mid twenties) and had just failed to fit into a size 16 bridesmaid dress for my friend’s wedding. Those photos plus the dress shopping horrendousness ‘shocked me’ into losing 3 stone with Weight Watchers so I actually wore a size 10 or 12 dress by the time I was a bridesmaid 6 months later!!

anyway yes, I think a lot of it is in the mind!

I'm short but have lost 3stone, 1 more to go and have gone fro 16/18 to 12/14. I get a surprise when o catch sight of myself in a window or mirror and how narrow I am! I'm still not close to being a healthy bmi (27.4) so will be narrower still I assume. I've been over weight to varying degrees, but mostly very, for most of my adult life-about 25 -30 years!!

I know what you mean @Somethingsnapped

I was 12 stone 10 and a size 14 / 16 on the bottom. Probably a 12 on top as I’m small chested.

I have a small frame but carrying a lot of fat.

I have lost two stone and am now down at 10 stone 7.

I am still wearing the same clothes.

But whereas I was probably bursting out the 14 before, they are now comfortable and in some cases, too big.

I think I was in denial about how big I was. Although “big” is probably the wrong word, as I do have a fairly small frame. Probably flabby is a better description. I had a spare tyre right round my middle. Huge arse. Arms and face very fat.

Now that the spare tyre has gone, I have a shape again.

I’ve lost 10centimetres from around my waist. But, unbelievably, I thought I had a small waist before! (Denial, and also just thought it was small because it was much smaller than my wide hips).

My waist was 31inches, hips 43.

Now my waist is just under 27inches, hips around 39.

I feel so much better. Sometimes I even feel slim even though I’m still a 14.

im now into healthy BMI range and don’t think I want to lose anymore (obviously I’d like to be slimmer but I don’t want to be on the jabs forever and also I don’t think it would be sustainable for me to lose more) but somebody took a photo of me the other day…..and I still looked fat

And this is me now weighing LESS than I did before I had my kids.

So basically, I just can’t really trust my own perception of myself. It’s just so difficult to see myself clearly.

Also, although I weigh less than when I had kids I’m guessing my body shape is just different.

I still need to tone up etc and I will keep trying that and I’m overall very, very happy with the weight I’ve lost…but I do just feel that I can’t really see myself objectively.

yes, ive lost just over 7st in the last 10 months and everyone goes on about it which puzzles me cos in my mind i dont look any different, that is, until i look at recent pictures or catch a glimpse or reflection of myself. i almost feel like im catfishing if that makes sense.

Thank you.

I've only seen a few photos that were taken over Christmas. Before the weight loss, it was my face I hated to look at more than anything. It just looked wide in a way it never seemed to in the mirror. I couldn't bear to look at the photos. Now, I can bear to look at them, but I still don't think they look like me! Maybe because of the wide angle/low quality on a phone camera. I look at other people and think the same about them too sometines though, whereas before, like a PP, everyone else looked great to me, and like their normal selves, whereas I looked bloated. So it's even-ing out now! I still see my flaws in the pictures, less so in the mirror!

I agree with what a PP said, about gaining weight slowly, but losing it relatively quickly, so just returning to how we saw ourselves anyway!

Yes, we sound quite similar. The same size before/after, and tall. Like you I carried my weight quite evenly. I've always been slightly pear shaped, so even though I had a big tummy, my weight would also go on hips, bum, thighs etc. So now, I still have that same waist/hip ratio. Although I have started tucking tops in, and I would never have done that before, so perhaps I can detect a bit of a difference!