Anyone else noticing jealousy?

[SorryImLateIDidntWantToCome]

I haven’t even lost that much weight in the grand schemes of things. I was 19 stone and now just over 16 stone and I can’t really tell and my clothes all fit fine. But I’ve noticed people (family, friends) looking at me, like more than normal. And then they say with an angry face “you’ve lost weight” “you’ve lost loads of weight” “you need to eat more you’ve lost too much weight” erm no my BMI is 41 I definitely DO need to lose weight!!

It’s never said in a nice way. It’s never followed with “you look good” or anything like that.

Went for lunch with a friend who was practically shovelling food down my throat telling me to eat more.

Im putting it down to jealousy and will keep going until I reach a healthy BMI. I’m doing this for my health, why can’t others just be happy for me?

Are your friends/family obese as well? It’s possible your success is highlighting their failure.

Goodness all my family and friends are always saying how well I’m doing and to keep going.

yours sound a bit dysfunctional OP

Sorry you've experienced that OP. I'm lucky in that so far everyone's been v nice and DH is suddenly finding me attractive which is really nice!! But maybe people are having jealous or mean thoughts and not expressing them to me. It's possible I guess.

Anyway, if people you know are acting like this, then you need to find more supportive friends. Do you know anyone else on mj/wli? Or is there anyone you know that's supportive?

I am only 8.5 stone now (so BMI around 19/19.5). Friends would be justified in telling me to eat more as I do look quite thin now (but I'm happy to maintain at this weight and feel good), but they haven't and have only been supportive. At a BMI over 30, it's cruel to try and get you to eat more and doesn't have your best interests at heart. Distance yourself from those that don't want the best for you, and gravitate yourself towards those that actually do care 💛

So my mother in particular is definitely dysfunctional when it comes to weight. As a teenager she would laugh when I did exercise in the house to try and lose weight. But as a child I wasn’t allowed to attend any groups (dancing mainly) because I was “chubbier than the other girls”. My dad took me in secret. Turns out I’m a fantastic dancer (apparently 🙈). So, she is dysfunctional for sure.

Other family and friends are all overweight and one friend is pregnant so perhaps she is upset by this.

I think you’ve hit the nail on the head @Redlightbulb

Sorry, my first reply probably appeared a bit sharp

now you have said that they tend to be overweight themselves then I would suggest perhaps to have a conversation with those that are open to it explaining how helpful you have found MJ in turning your weight around

That really does sound dysfunctional. Well done for looking after yourself anyway despite their issues when you were younger - and now. Bloody good going!

Families eh! Thank you - still a loooong way to go!