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Original poster

Is it normal to go on honeymoon not immediately after the wedding?

30 replies

Amby99 · 06/08/2025 10:57

I’m 9 weeks pregnant and getting married to my fiance at around 20 weeks. For reasons I probably don’t need to explain to people I wasn’t on contraception due to a low egg count on a scan. I knew I always wanted to be pregnant and so infertility scared me more than getting pregnant before marriage.

anyway - so that’s why the marriage is a whirlwind and it’s very unlikely we will be able to go on a honeymoon.

I guess we could go to a romantic country hotel immediately after but Maldives or somewhere is probably completely off the cards due to wedding finances and just being sensible before the baby arrives (which is what really matters).

so I was thinking instead we could go next summer when the baby is 3/4/5 months old to a really great Greek island. I would love to go on holiday with the baby - I’ve always loved seeing families with their below 1 year olds so that doesn’t scare me.

Is this a bad idea? Of course it’s never going to be ‘romantic’ as it would be if it were just the two of us and I guess what I’m asking is, is this a bad idea? I guess it wouldn’t be classed as a ‘honeymoon’

even if we could go away somewhere after the wedding, I might be so tired, swollen and fatigued and anywhere hot and tropical this time of year is at least a 9 hour flight, which usually I love but being pregnant I’d imagine would be tricky.

OP posts:
Original poster
Amby99 · 06/08/2025 10:59

Also to add I actually only have 11 days annual leave between now and December and 4 of those will probably go before / after the wedding to prepare / decamp. I know my company actually gives you an extra 7 days annual leave after you get married so I could definitely use this next year on top of my 28 days

OP posts:
Unilaterallyinsane · 06/08/2025 11:01

You should do exactly what suits you. Congratulations on your pregnancy and your upcoming wedding. 💐

PumpkinScarf · 06/08/2025 11:02

I was in a very similar boat we are 4 years down the line now with 2 beautiful children and have yet to go on a honeymoon 🤣

BunnyLover7 · 06/08/2025 11:03

Congratulations OP. I think we went 3 weeks after the wedding

minsmum · 06/08/2025 11:03

My daughter and her husband went on honeymoon a year after their wedding no one thought it was strange

Gouache · 06/08/2025 11:04

The Maldives is the dullest place on the planet. It’s only developed a weirdly glossy reputation as the ultimate honeymoon destination because it’s considered crass to complain your honeymoon destination is boring, because you’re supposed to be wrapped up in one another.

I would go somewhere closer to home within a few weeks of the wedding.

I think you’d be crazy to book an expensive holiday somewhere hot when you don’t have any idea how you will cope with the normal day to day of having a very new baby. Some babies are fine with planes and heat, others not. Some mothers take to the newborn stage, some find it tough. It might be fine, but it’s not something I’d commit to in advance. Nothing worse than feeling you’re supposed to be enjoying an expensive holiday when you end up spending all your days in a hotel room with the air con on.

Scottishskifun · 06/08/2025 11:04

I think it's pretty common now for there to be a gap. Most friends have done a few days straight after the wedding in the UK as decompress and enjoy time then have something bigger later on.

Needmorelego · 06/08/2025 11:04

There's no rule you have to have a honeymoon.
It's literally just a holiday.

DappledThings · 06/08/2025 11:05

It's entirely up to you. Our honeymoon was 5 months after our wedding as it was timed around when we could incorporate a couple of days of a cricket test match into where we wanted to go!

Original poster
Amby99 · 06/08/2025 11:08

Gouache · 06/08/2025 11:04

The Maldives is the dullest place on the planet. It’s only developed a weirdly glossy reputation as the ultimate honeymoon destination because it’s considered crass to complain your honeymoon destination is boring, because you’re supposed to be wrapped up in one another.

I would go somewhere closer to home within a few weeks of the wedding.

I think you’d be crazy to book an expensive holiday somewhere hot when you don’t have any idea how you will cope with the normal day to day of having a very new baby. Some babies are fine with planes and heat, others not. Some mothers take to the newborn stage, some find it tough. It might be fine, but it’s not something I’d commit to in advance. Nothing worse than feeling you’re supposed to be enjoying an expensive holiday when you end up spending all your days in a hotel room with the air con on.

Yes this is so true - not that we would book anywhere now now anyway (before the baby is born).

re Maldives - yes I’ve heard that plenty of times too! just used it as an example of a ‘tropical’ destination as an example really

OP posts:
pourmeadrinkpls · 06/08/2025 11:08

I think your plan makes sense and I'd do the same, but I think it won't feel like a honeymoon unless ita very soon after. The buzz wears off pretty quickly! Congratulations and enjoy your day 😊

HappydaysArehere · 06/08/2025 11:19

Have a lovely holiday when it suits you. Honeymoon is just a name for a special time spent away. You are more likely to enjoy it if you are relaxed about it. Have a lovely wedding and enjoy meeting your little love.

mamagogo1 · 06/08/2025 11:22

do what suits you! For my first marriage we had been to the Maldives a couple of years before, for our honeymoon we went to London for a couple of nights and saw a play and a show.

mondaytosunday · 06/08/2025 11:26

Certainly. I know a few who have had delays for several reasons. Anyway what does it matter? Do whatever suits you.

ColdClimates · 06/08/2025 11:34

I agree with @Gouache -- I would go somewhere shorthaul and lowkey at some point after the wedding but before you get very pregnant, depending on how you feel, whether or not you call it a 'honeymoon'.

I think the key thing is not to put pressure on yourself either by going (1) somewhere longhaul, expensive and tropical when pregnant, when you may not enjoy it and feel frustrated or (2) somewhere hot and supposedly fun with a very small baby when you don't know how you will adapt to parenthood or how your baby will adapt to a flight or change in temperature/routine etc.

Our DS went on his first flight when he was three months, and flew fairly often throughout his babyhood, because all our family is overseas, and is fine with heat, but everyone's babies are different. A friend of mine who also got married when pregnant and didn't honeymoon, was really looking forward to their first real family holiday when their daughter was toddling, and was naturally upset when they spent ten days in a lovely Greek resort inside their hotel room with their aircon running, because their daughter (a generally happy go lucky child) screamed herself hysterical at the slightest touch of water, pool or sea, and also at the touch of sand. She was just starting to calm down about it on their last day, but meanwhile they had spent thousands of pounds on basically watching Netflix in a hotel room.

SnaccidentsHappen · 06/08/2025 11:52

I’ve been married 10yrs and still haven’t been on a honeymoon. It really doesn’t matter when you go.

Sassybooklover · 06/08/2025 11:58

There's no right or wrong answer. We went on honeymoon to Cyprus, a couple of days after our wedding. However, I wasn't pregnant and neither did we already have a child. For us, the timeframe suited our situation. If going away next year is better for you, then do this. I highly recommend the Greek Islands too, yes it will be a different type of honeymoon, but I'm sure it will be fabulous all the same.

TheSmallAssassin · 06/08/2025 11:59

One thing to remember, despite what people (who are usually trying to sell you things) tell you, there are no rules about weddings! You can do whatever you like and it's OK! If I were in your shoes I would have a couple of days away after the wedding just to relax and enjoy yourself before the baby comes, it doesn't have to be long haul, or even abroad!

If you want a big destination holiday later on, then you can call it your honeymoon if you want (there have always been people who have done that too)

Bluesclues1 · 06/08/2025 11:59

We got married last year and just went away for a short break afterwards and we’re doing a bigger trip later this year. After the wedding, we both agreed that we are so glad we delayed the big trip as couldn’t imagine having to mentally prep for going away for more than a few days after the chaos of the big day!

jay55 · 06/08/2025 12:01

It sounds like a lovely plan and it doesn’t matter if it’s next summer or in five summers time.

Ddakji · 06/08/2025 12:04

We got married when DD was a toddler, 14 years ago, and still haven’t been on a honeymoon!

I think these days these things aren’t set in stone so do what works for you and don’t feel there’s any time pressure.

(I went to the Maldives for my first marriage honeymoon. It was really boring.)

plinkityplink · 06/08/2025 12:06

I was 16 weeks pregnant when I got married and we had one night in a v. Posh hotel then a week in the Channel Islands. Not sure why people think a honeymoon has to be abroad, expensive, exotic etc. if I were you I’d have one in the UK otherwise it will just be another holiday once you have kids.

LadyWestStar · 06/08/2025 12:09

A honeymoon was supposed to be the time couples would be getting to know each other and having lots of sex, as they wouldn’t be living together or having sex before marriage. As this no longer applies to you or most couples nowadays, it is just a holiday. You can have a holiday whenever you want. I think it would be nice to have a few days away somewhere though, even just somewhere nice in the UK.

Lilywc · 07/08/2025 18:06

Got nothing to do with anyone when you take a honeymoon!
go where YOU are ready

have fun x

Kimmeridge · 07/08/2025 18:16

Personally id say your country house hotel was your honeymoon and your Greek hotel was your first family holiday

The definition of a honeymoon is right after the wedding. So whether its a few nights or a few weeks its where you go afterwards. Anything months or years is a holiday. People seem to think a honeymoon has to be a big fancy holiday. Im sure the pp saying they haven't had a honeymoon in 12 years have been a holiday together