Cheating before wedding

[WillIBeHappy13]

Need help

Call the wedding off.
Find someone better.

Who cheated? You or the person you're marrying?

Save yourself the divorce
Ultimate disrespect cheating anyway but cheating before the wedding there's taking the piss and then there's taking THE piss
Sorry to hear this but this just ultimately shows he doesn't want to spend the rest of his life with you x

Omg I just read the person before me I didn't think that there could be a possibility you cheated lol

That's what I was wondering.

Bit silly to start a thread with zero information OP.

Cancel the wedding.

I found out the day after the wedding he had been cheating. Took six years and a toddler for me to find out he did it again and have the courage to kick him to the kerb. Don't be me.

If you cheated, don't make them, be me.

I just read your first post before you edited. You poor thing. You must be heartbroken.

You’re going to do what you’re going to do, but OP… If that’s how he’s going to be around the easy and exciting times gif your relationship - imagine what he’ll be like when it’s the hard times. When you’re managing kids, other family and life events.

Just do yourself a favour and find someone who loves you.You owe him nothing. Best of luck.

OP, I think you might need to copy and paste the post you made previous to the edit.

Ah op. I think a lot here depends on his reaction. Is he genuinely remorseful? Is he still in touch with her? How accountable is he holding himself or is he making excuses? What actions is he planning to take to take responsibility and help you both move forward?

If he's not doing any of these without you prompting him then you leave and find yourself someone better who treats you and values you as you deserve. I'm sorry you must be heartbroken to come off such a high with your wedding to then find this out. Be gentle with yourself op.

I haven't seen your first edit post op but take it from me - it cost me more to get divorced than it did to get married - not just financially but the emotional toll too.

It's easier to cancel a wedding than get divorced. You can take the control (and the moral high ground).

A better future is waiting for you. If you still want to be with him you can begin to rebuild and maybe marry in the future. But now, you need to cancel your plans and pick your wounds.

I cant stop crying. I am heartbroken.
He has been crying non stop too and apologising. He has told his family and they are not happy with him at all.

The wedding has already happened. Cheating was two months before the wedding. I had no idea. He went and met this girl, took her for dinner, paid, hugged her and kissed her neck. They had intimate conversations over the phone ''what do you think wouldve happened if things went further''.

I have nothing left.

The woman involved was also aware that he was getting married soon, but they both continued. After the wedding there were flirtatious conversations (short convos).

I confronted and lost it. He has been apologising profusely and has been saying we can work this out and very remorseful

Another man cry baby that thinks tears and saying sorry will manipulate his partner into forgiving him.

Never settle for anything but the best treatment and loyalty that a man can offer.

Yours has failed you and now he's been caught out there will be the added resentment simmering inside that caught him out.

I have no trust in any man anymore. I know im generalising. But after this huge shock, I just dont know about anything

File for divorce OP- the sooner you break this legal bond with him, the better off you will be financially surely. You can't base a marriage on lies, and he will likely do it again if you stay married. I'm so sorry he's done this to you and that you are going through this when you should be in the blissful newlywed phase. But put yourself first and get rid of him.

Leave him. Absolutely outrageous behaviour. The fact that they had further conversations, I mean, what the actual?!? DO NOT TRUST THIS MAN AGAIN.
I am so sorry. Find your rage and use it to build a better life without him.

I’m so sorry that happens. And I can fully understand why you’d feel that way. It was so selfish, unfair and unloving of him.

Yes, there may be tears now. But would there have been tears had you not found out? Would he have told you?

He’s likely crying because you all know what an idiot he is, not because he hurt and betrayed you.

I hope you find the strength you need to do the right thing for yourself xxx

I feel like a failure as its only been like 4 months into our marriage

You’re not the failure.
Let people think what they want.

You're not the failure he is! Absolutely you should leave and find someone better, you'll never be able to trust him again after he's deceived you like this

I feel like it. The woman involved apologised too but I have so much hatred for them both. Him for doing this to me. Her for knowing hes getting married and continuing

I thought to give myself time before deciding whether to try again or separating. I'm unsure as I do truly love him

Is the woman someone you both know?

No. It was his colleague. Someone he knew for 7/8 months.