How to ask for gifts of money (if any)

[TigerJoy]

We're getting married in our 40s. We have lived together for 8 years, we're having a baby. We have a tiny house with too much stuff.

We wanted to say no gifts, but several friends have said they'll get us something if we dont have a list.

I don't want to request random things from John Lewis. We are currently getting rid of stuff to make room for baby things.

If anything we'd like to ask for contributions to a honeymoon, which we'll do next year. Is there a website we can use that people can donate money to?

We will also suggest donations to MSF.

Honestly I'd rather not do anything at all - does anyone have any advice?

You need a poem!

Just say please don't get us gifts? Explain why. If these people are coming to your wedding, you should be close enough to be honest

Say absolutely nothing and people will give you money anyway.

Absolutely no poem. There is no cute way to ask for money.

Keep schtum.

I really hate the asking for money. However in your situation then i would put no gifts and if people ask you then i would say we would enjoy a contribution to a special meal when on our honeymoon. I agree you do not want lots of random stuff but if I was a guest and said we would like to get you something then i would be happy to put money in a card with the thought you would use it to treat yourself.

Thanks, yes I hate the asking for money (we don't need it), don't like the poems...

We will just say no gifts, donate to MSF if you wish.

I didn’t put anything on the invites but when asked said no gifts as we have everything but B and Q vouchers as planning to do up garden. Some people still have gifts (mainly family) but majority put cash / vouchers in a card. If you say you want nothing people will give you cash/ vouchers/ bottle of champagne/ random wedding tat (his and hers champagne glasses that will find its way to a charity shop eventually) type stuff

Ten past four

Asking for money is fine, it’s no less “grabby” than having a gift list. We used the Trailfinders honeymoon fund, but obviously you have to book through Trailfinders. You could just say ‘we would appreciate donations to MSF (with a link) or a contribution to our honeymoon’. We did this and got zero physical gifts - ideal.

We didn't ask for anything and received lots of money

Nobody likes the poems but they make it clear.

Just have a poem.

Could you put something along the lines of that as you have lived together for 8 years, are having a baby and have a tiny house, you'd prefer no gifts. If guests would like to give something, you'd appreciate a donation to MSF.

I think it's really bad manners to ask for money and comes across as grasping.

I hate people asking for money (for any occasion) but it is made even worse by a poem. It is not cute or funny.

“Absolutely no gifts please, we have everything we need”.

Isn't the poem a joke inspired by other MN threads?

No - I have had 2 cringeworthy poems with invitations in the past.

Wedding Gift Poems | How to ask for cash for wedding gift | Money Poems (daisychaininvites.co.uk)

Omg 🫣😂

No it’s a real thing! A variation on no presents but your presence but if you do want to give them give us money/ vouchers for honeymoon/ house / whatever

I find asking for money in a wedding invite irritating no matter how it's said. Having said that I would always give a cheque for a wedding.

@ohthejoys21 you still have a cheque book?!

We said no gifts please, we have all we need. Everyone gave cash / vouchers and this was nearly 20 years ago.

We didn’t mention anything about gifts for our wedding and ended up with mostly money and a few gifts. People tend to do money/vouchers if a couple have been living together and have a house already

We got married in our 50s, and said no gifts. Still got a few 😬 Plus some donations to charities on our behalf.

I only use it for weddings

I still use my cheque book several times a year, and I am not a dinosaur!

On my part, yes, absolutely!
The main advantage of a poem is entertainment value when it gets shared with the world.