Husband not invited to wedding

[WeddingAIBU]

Got an invitation to my cousin’s wedding and it appears my husband (of 10 years) isn’t invited. My sibling’s spouse has been invited. AIBU to think this is really quite rude and decline the invitation? I’m not that close to my cousin, to be fair, but I don’t think sibling is either.

[MoonWoman69]

I think that's just plain rude. I wouldn't go if my sisters husband/partner was invited and mine wasn't! That's very strange etiquette to me!

[WeddingAIBU]

Oh good, I’m not going mad then! Would totally understand if he was some casual new boyfriend but this seems almost deliberately rude. And I’d already booked accommodation, grr.

[ForTheMemories]

You're not close, just decline.

[thinkingcapon]

Does the invite just not include a plus one or his name on it?

[DistinguishedSocialCommentator]

What does the invite state?

If he is not inc, don't go
Could it be that they liked your ex hubby and this guy and you cheated but they forgave you but not him? (Just a typical scenario I've heard about and if it does not apply to you, sorry for asking)

[mirror245]

I've gone to lots of weddings without dh but it's odd that your siblings spouses have been invited and yours hasn't. Do they have an issue with your dh? Is he an arse?

[SirChenjins]

That’s odd - could they have simply forgotten to add his name?

[WeddingAIBU]

@thinkingcapon

Does the invite just not include a plus one or his name on it?

Envelope just addressed to me. No name(s) written on the card.

[WeddingAIBU]

@DistinguishedSocialCommentator

What does the invite state?

If he is not inc, don't go
Could it be that they liked your ex hubby and this guy and you cheated but they forgave you but not him? (Just a typical scenario I've heard about and if it does not apply to you, sorry for asking)

Edited

Ha, gosh no, this is my only husband and we’re both extremely boring. Nothing juicy like this!

[WeddingAIBU]

@mirror245

I've gone to lots of weddings without dh but it's odd that your siblings spouses have been invited and yours hasn't. Do they have an issue with your dh? Is he an arse?

Not an arse to my knowledge :-D

[MyGooseisTotallyLoose]

Do they know him?

[WandaWonder]

If you want to go then go if not don't it really is that simple

[Mummame222]

Ask to double check. Could just be a mistake.

[RitaIncognita]

It's very rude to exclude a spouse when it's family.

[WeddingAIBU]

@MyGooseisTotallyLoose

Do they know him?

Not very well, no. It’s a Christmas/easter/big family occasions sort of relationship so we only see each other a few times a year.

[GoingToNotGoingThe]

If there are no names on the actual invitation I'm not sure I'd assume he hasn't been invited.

Each to their own, fheir wedding their roolz and so on, but, (and I know this isn't the correct MN response), I really hate this. I find it so rude to invite only half of a couple to a wedding, which is by definition a couples 'thing'.

Dh has been to weddings without me and i without him, because of childcare, but I've only had one invitation in my life where only one of us was invited (and didn't go). It's just such a rude thing to do and I'll never get it.

[WeAreWarriorsWeAreWarriors]

I'd double check if it's a mistake. If it's not it is odd and rude and I'd decline.

[heldinadream]

@WeddingAIBU

Envelope just addressed to me. No name(s) written on the card.

They've forgotten to write the card. He would have been on it. I honestly think this one is a mistake OP. It doesn't make sense.

[thinkingcapon]

Surely this is a mistake.....if no names on card isn't it just they've not filled it in! Is your other family members cards got each name on theirs ?

[WeddingAIBU]

@WandaWonder

If you want to go then go if not don't it really is that simple

I did want to go (love a wedding) but now I don’t think I do. I’m offended that they seem to think less of me/my marriage (compared to my sibling).

Unfortunately, cousin’s mum and my parent have a somewhat fraught relationship so I feel I need to tread carefully.

[DistinguishedSocialCommentator]

@WeddingAIBU

Ha, gosh no, this is my only husband and we’re both extremely boring. Nothing juicy like this!

lol, sorry had to ask, thanks

Then with just your name on the card - was it had delivered or posted?

I ask as it is hand-delivered, could it be two people with your name on their guest list? Or did they write your first and surname?

You bilings invited, was that a separate card to their house

From my background we write, Mr & Mrs ?? Simth and family - this is why at most wedding there are at least 2k people though the younger generation only invite family and those relatives/etc that stay in touch

Could it be a mistake as just forgot, oversight? Or has there been comments against hubby by them

[WeddingAIBU]

Posted, and envelope addressed to Mrs Jane Doe so I don’t think it can have been an oversight. Sibling’s invite posted to their house so I haven’t seen it… will have to find out somehow. All feels quite embarrassing though, like I’m trying to scrounge an invitation.

[benjoin]

Maybe they hate him?

[WeddingAIBU]

@benjoin

Maybe they hate him?

I hope not! Can’t think why they would.

[WeddingAIBU]

Thanks for the replies everyone. I need to give it some thought.