Ceremony at 1pm.. what time for food?

[MickeyMouseShithouse]

I’ve booked our registrar for 1pm - what time would you then have food?

8k for a BBQ sounds a lot! Can you cut back 1k there and spend that on bacon butties? Remember, in-house caterers will happily rip the shit out of you so negotiate hard: on reflection, we need to serve something extra at night. 8k is our total, so what can we move from the BBQ to cover this?

It's quite an awkward time to pick. The earlier in the day it is the more food you have to provide, if it's going on all day with an evening do.

We got married at 3pm, canapés and fizz asap after the ceremony so probably 4/4.30pm - and there were loads of canapés. Even getting married at 3pm, some daft people hadn't had lunch beforehand so really went for the canapés big time.

Then the meal was supposed to be 6pm, ended up sitting down 6.30pm as it took a bit longer to get there (as everyone was enjoying the drinks reception so much!), and we were eating until about 8.30pm. We had everyone there all day so didn't provide any more food after that.

With your schedule I think you'd need to do food and fizz at 2.30pm, wedding breakfast at 4pm, then provide bacon butties etc at 9pm.

@FlounderingFruitcake as above we didn’t get to choose.

Actually, I’m telling lies - the £8k includes drink packages (you have to choose a drinks package with meal package) and includes the cheese cake, and optional extras.. so actually the main meal alone is slightly less.

But regardless, it’s a wedding breakfast package and we went with the cheapest options anyway (which meant forfeiting brownies on the ice cream station!😭) 😆

we’ll choose some evening food, I was just hoping to save some pennies by putting out the cheese-cake but never mind, it will be fine🤭 I’m glad I asked here, I’d feel awful leaving people starving on the day if I hadn’t 💀

Be a bit pushy (in a nice way) with the caterers. It’s easy to get stuck in ‘package’ mode and think well it has to be ‘x’ but it’s your wedding, caterers are creative people and there will be some flexibility around things. Have a chat with them about what you’d really like to happen and then ask how you can achieve that if you approach this creatively together with a budget of whatever it is. Hopefully they will be open to discussing some more flexible options.

If you’re doing speeches, don’t do them all at the beginning of the meal. Either spread them out during the canapés/champagne slot or spread them out between courses. If I’m hungry, I don’t give a shit about how the best man fondly remembers waxing the groom’s head during a drunken night, I want my food 😂

I would have negotiated prices had it been different circumstances - but as some background/context: we booked the venue before it started doing weddings so we were given a quote of £7k for the whole venue and then they’re prices came out shortly after we booked and paid a deposit and we would be paying an extra £12k for the venue alone now.. on top of the £7🫣 - they agreed to honour our quote ect so I don’t want to be a CF and try and bump them down on any prices 😩 I’m not a very confident person😂

3pm, 3.30 at latest

We are doing ceremony at 230, drinks and canapés and then sit down for the meal at 430. Also doing photos pre ceremony so we can have a shorter drinks reception and not miss the whole thing.

At our sons wedding there was typical sit down meal in the afternoon then hot roast pork sandwiches in the evening. My husband asked if they would do chip butties as well, (he is not a meat eater) they went down a storm and my friends still mention them 12 years later!

@Shunkleisshiny If we could work enough overtime (and sell enough of the kids clothes on Vinted) to get a hog roast we absolutely would. I love hog roast!

Ah that makes more sense, it sounded like you were spending 8k on just the bbq!

I’d still try to negotiate though and see if there’s any flexibility- could any of the leftover bbq meat be made into sandwiches for the evening for minimal additional cost? Could 1 of the side options be held back for later? Can you choose Prosecco instead of champagne for the welcome drink and put the saving towards an additional food order for the evening? Etc.

Also change your mindset! They quoted you an amount and you’re paying it- honouring their original quote is not them doing you a favour. There’s also a big difference between politely and professionally negotiating food options that don’t blow the budget and being a CF.

It depends on the wedding. You don't have to serve a meal. I've been to lots of lovely quite quick weddings with just canapes and champagne then tea and cake and speeches and then bye bye. It is really nice. Seems particularly common in London and other cities, so you know, not destination weddings.

Can you not book the registrar for later so that people can get their own lunch beforehand?

1pm is a really awkward time, IMO.

£8k on food. Wow what's the menu and how many guests

We chose a later wedding time so would Fred people once

That's what makes a wedding costly

Got married at 4pm and drinks photos then meal/speeches 6 and more evening guests 730/8

We did a hog roast as didn't want a 3 course sit down meal

If you so canopies then people might not want a 3 course meal

Scrap the nibbles and move meal earlier if getting married at 1

We did 2pm but ours was

2pm service
230 group photos
3pm canapés and drinks
430 speeches
5pm food
630 entertainment- we had casino games
8pm evening
9pm first dance
930 evenings buffet

What do destination weddings have to do with this? The OP has made it clear in her posts she was talking about a meal or she'd have asked what time to schedule tea and cake.

Your cake sounds fab. What a good idea.
We put out cheese crackers and bread for the evening arrivals
It was mainly those that had been there all day that tucked in.

We had a hog roast in 2021. Was bloody amazing !!!

With chips. Coleslaw. Potato salad

Didn't want a 3 course sit down meal

I think we’re going to get the hog roast with roast garlic and Rosemary potatoes and rustic slaw.. it just sounds too good not to!

you only get married once, right?(hopefully)

Just as an aside - sorry for using your thread OP!

How much per head is food at a wedding?
No alcohol

I agree. It was the reason we had a 3pm ceremony.

I’d also have a later ceremony time so that you can serve dinner at dinner time. If you do that then your planned evening snacks will be perfect.

I feel like if we have a later ceremony time then the day is over quicker 😩 I was actually going to go slightly earlier. Everybody says how the day is over in a flash and if the day doesn’t start until 3pm then the days pretty much over before it begins? and with how much we’ve spent I really don’t want it to feel like just a few hours 😅

@DarkNecessities our package started from £55 per head and that was just for food and didn’t include starters, but does include canapés.

The day might drag for the guests, especially if they are kept waiting for food. It is the main complaint from mumsnetters who don't like going to weddings. It is your wedding, but you also have to consider your guests.

Thankyou @MickeyMouseShithouse

Remember that the entire day is your wedding day, not just the ceremony and reception. Enjoy every moment, the morning breakfast, leisurely bath, the time getting ready, those moments with family before the ceremony. Those moments are precious too and can get lost in the stress.