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Original poster

Gutted have to wait longer for wedding!

37 replies

TwoCoffeesPlease · 07/07/2022 03:12

Not really sure the point of this post just feeling really disappointed and want to vent.

Fiance and I picked a venue we liked the look of (it’s a museum which is important context) and went to visit it yesterday. We absolutely fell in love and really feel it’s the right wedding venue for us.

Prior to our visit I checked dates with the wedding planning people to confirm we could have a date for summer 2023 and we left yesterday with a date for next summer all booked pending contract.

About half an hour later, while we were celebrating, they emailed us saying they were really sorry but she had made a mistake and they could only accommodate ceremonies next summer due to an exhibition.

She offered us a ceremony only and reception elsewhere close by or an alternative date. After lots of soul searching fiancé and I felt that the main thing we loved about the venue was the fact it was all done in house and there was the opportunity for guests to explore the museum after hours during the reception and the reception elsewhere would feel like a lesser version of what we wanted.

We don’t want to look at other venues because we absolutely fell in love with this one and it’s also more affordable than lots of venues in our area. So we are now looking at dates for March/April 2024 which just feels far too long away!

I’m so disappointed and feel like a twat for telling everyone we would be getting married next summer 😞

OP posts:
Original poster
TwoCoffeesPlease · 07/07/2022 03:16

Realise I have posted this in the middle of the night so I know I won’t get a lot of responses I just can’t sleep thinking about how disappointed I am

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 07/07/2022 03:18

No one will care when your wedding is, so stop worrying about that. You just have to decide if you're willing to wait for the wedding you want. You are or you're not.

MrszClaus · 07/07/2022 03:20

Ahh that's rubbish OP!! So annoying they made an admin error and allowed you to think you'd secured a date for next summer - hopefully waiting until spring 2024 will give you a few extra months to save up / plan some extra treats or wedding bits / get excited longer! I had to do similar due to covid and it was so annoying to wait a bit longer, but just think - you'll be married at the end of it all 😊 it sounds like a fab wedding, I hope you have an amazing time!

Sunflowers2047 · 07/07/2022 03:36

Wish my problems were like this.

Ponderingwindow · 07/07/2022 03:49

It really is just a bit longer and it does give you the opportunity to save up extra for an amazing honeymoon or to plan some special touch to add to the wedding. If you are a diy type person, think of all the extra crafting time this will allow you for getting ready for the wedding. The gorgeous invitations you could make or the museum themed favors you could craft. Handmade paper bouquets, if your crazy like me you could even make the paper.

ReeseWitherfork · 07/07/2022 03:59

Wedding in a museum sounds lovely OP! It feels like ages now but it will come in a flash. Hang on and having the wedding you want! Even if you wanted a summer wedding, waiting until summer 2024 will be worth it.

Hate that they got your hopes up!

Original poster
TwoCoffeesPlease · 07/07/2022 08:33

Thank you for the mostly kind messages!

@Sunflowers2047 that feels a little uncalled for seeing as this is the weddings board and I have posted with a wedding problem.

Still feeling disappointed this morning, realised I am going to have to cancel my wedding dress appointment (yes I know I got carried away arranging it but I was told there were lots of dates for next summer) so that’s a bit gutting.

Trying to see the positives but not doing very well!

OP posts:
Talipesmum · 07/07/2022 08:49

Oh you poor thing, don’t worry! The time will go really quickly. Don’t cancel your dress appointment- you can still get planning! It’s really normal to book a couple of years in advance - you both know you love the venue and, like so many things in life, it’s worth waiting for. Maybe plan a lovely short weekend away on your original date to make yourselves feel better and have it to look forward to?

WitchDancer · 07/07/2022 09:17

Can they accommodate your wedding before the exhibition starts? You won't have to wait so long to get married if they can.

Original poster
TwoCoffeesPlease · 07/07/2022 09:28

WitchDancer · 07/07/2022 09:17

Can they accommodate your wedding before the exhibition starts? You won't have to wait so long to get married if they can.

That would be ideal but unfortunately next spring is not a good time for us. This makes this thread outing but whatever - my fiancé is coming towards the end of a PHD and he is likely to have to defend his thesis around that time/ have graduation but we don’t know when yet so difficult to plan anything

OP posts:
Gazelda · 07/07/2022 09:51

What a shame OP. I can understand your disappointment.
I'm sure you'll have readjusted your mindset in a few days though. It's a delay not a cancellation. More time to plan and be excited.
Spend next year celebrating your fiancés PHD. That's a huge achievement
And make sure you tie in the wedding costs at 2023 rates, don't let them add a price hike!

Original poster
TwoCoffeesPlease · 07/07/2022 12:55

So I had a good cry this morning while I was cleaning the bathroom and dropped the toothbrush dish causing it to break and it sent me over the edge 😂

I am trying very hard to reframe it in my head and I am getting there. We have decided to go for Good Friday 2024 and we feel quite good about it being a day that everyone is off work and having the 3 days afterwards to rest and recover without having to take additional annual leave. Obviously some people will have opinions about this but we aren’t religious so it’s just a day off to us and we will be sending out save the dates so people will have lots of notice with it being a holiday weekend.

It also has the advantage of realistically being just as likely to be sunny as august but less likely to be baking hot which is good because I was worried about the ball gown style dress I want and a hot day. I’m sure I will come to terms with it eventually 😂

OP posts:
CauliWobble · 07/07/2022 12:59

Good Friday is a good date as long as you don't mind people not going as they'd rather go away on holiday (this happened to us but we pointed it out when we sent the invites and said we didn't mind). Anyway people will be fine if you just say ah no the venue made a mistake so it's not next year but the year after now.

Getoffmyshoes · 07/07/2022 13:00

Why don’t you just choose a different venue? It’s not the only option to get married there.

I had this problem last year, the venue we wanted was fully booked for our suitable dates. We chose another one because being married was more important to us then getting married at a particular venue.

Hellosunshine1993 · 07/07/2022 13:09

We’ve just booked our venue for summer 2024 as it’s completely fully booked next year! I was disappointed at first, but at least we have longer to save and can enjoy the planning as no rush.

I’m finding a lot of suppliers aren’t available next year but have had pick of the bunch for 2024!

Original poster
TwoCoffeesPlease · 07/07/2022 13:21

Getoffmyshoes · 07/07/2022 13:00

Why don’t you just choose a different venue? It’s not the only option to get married there.

I had this problem last year, the venue we wanted was fully booked for our suitable dates. We chose another one because being married was more important to us then getting married at a particular venue.

I know it’s not but we really love this venue and a lot of places around us are a lot more expensive and therefore not really an option. There are some other cheaper places we could look but we just felt like we could see our wedding happening at this place, like it suited our vibe. It’s hard to explain I guess

OP posts:
Gazelda · 07/07/2022 13:49

We married on Good Friday.
We had an Easter egg hunt for the kids and bowls of purple foil wrapped Easter eggs as table centrepieces - dirt cheap! We put a purple flower that matched my bouquet on each place settings rather than having wedding favours. The flowers that time of year are gorgeous.

Doidontimmm · 07/07/2022 14:06

If it’s all inside why does it have to be summer? Could they accommodate you autumn/winter?

Original poster
TwoCoffeesPlease · 07/07/2022 14:28

Doidontimmm · 07/07/2022 14:06

If it’s all inside why does it have to be summer? Could they accommodate you autumn/winter?

The exhibition is running July - February 😩

OP posts:
Doidontimmm · 07/07/2022 14:35

Awww that’s a shame!

LIZS · 07/07/2022 14:39

You can do it before July? I guess you need to decide what is more important being married or that venue. If you can still have the ceremony there is the nearby reception not acceptable.

Original poster
TwoCoffeesPlease · 07/07/2022 15:17

LIZS · 07/07/2022 14:39

You can do it before July? I guess you need to decide what is more important being married or that venue. If you can still have the ceremony there is the nearby reception not acceptable.

We can’t do it before July as my fiancé doesn’t know when he will be required to defend his thesis and does not want all that stress mixing in with getting ready for the wedding.

Ceremony only loses the USP of getting married in the museum - the opportunity to view the exhibitions after hours as we will be moving onto the other place. It also opens up our guest list in a way that we don’t want (one of the appeals of the museum is we are limited to 70 guests so simply cannot accommodate random family members whereas the alternative reception venue can accommodate up to 500 so no excuses!)

OP posts:
Threetulips · 07/07/2022 15:34

Not sure I’d be that bothered about an out of hours museum viewing.

Either I like the museum and go regularly or I don’t go at all.

Not sure what difference it would make to being married.

Threetulips · 07/07/2022 15:35

You could test the waters? Invite the 50 people to the museum and see who says yes?

SheepingStandingUp · 07/07/2022 15:36

Sunflowers2047 · 07/07/2022 03:36

Wish my problems were like this.

MN would be very quiet if people could only post of they had the biggest problem of everyone else.