Autumn/Winter 2020 corona brides (and grooms!) Pity Party

[CoronaBride2020]

As there were so many of us on the thread I started yesterday I thought we could do with our own dedicated Pity Party thread. If you’re a fellow bride/groom/non-binary soon-to-be-wedded person anxiously waiting to see whether their wedding will be able to take place in the coming months then please step right this way, grab an L plate and novelty straw and share your woes here!

Words of comfort and consideration from those not about to get married are also welcome but please, for the love of god, refrain from saying any of the following:

1. ‘Why don’t you just get married and get it over with?’ (Yes that is what we are all trying to do!!!)

2. ‘You can have a big party next year instead!’ (Hahaha great another event to plan, thanks but no thanks)

3. ‘It’s the marriage that’s important, not the wedding’ (Anyone who says this will be immediately pelted with willy straws).

Rant away my friends!

Congratulations Frazzled. I'm so happy you made it !! I've only just found this thread and I'm another anxious Covid bride. It should have been May and now we're due to marry on the 30th though it still feels like it could be snatched away. I'm waiting until Monday to email guests with final arrangements and have asked the florist to hold off ordering until then too. Sleepless nights or what ?

Aww DogsMother you’re a week behind me so this is basically me talking to myself from a week ago... just keep going and hang in there! Do whatever you need to do to look after yourself while you run down the clock and wait for a bit more certainty. I got really into meditation and aromatherapy which are most definitely not ‘me’ things at all but they have helped me through the stress no end. And exercise if you can! I spoke to a therapist who said anything you can do to satisfy the ‘fight or flight’ urge will help to burn up all the stress hormones and excess oxygen in your body, and it has really really helped me.

I’ve now got three days to go and I’m feeling LOADS better. I’m sure it will be the same for you, the stress will gradually dissipate the closer you get and as you start to feel able to make plans properly. You got this!!!

Thank you CoronaBride. It's actually in sight for you now and I hope you have the most wonderful day. I really need to make some final arrangements but feel like I will scupper everything if I do. We're Tier 1 though so perhaps that's a good thing. I'm definitely on top of the exercise though perhaps should swap gin for meditation

@CoronaBride2020 almost at the home stretch. I've suddenly become quite overwhelmed with all my emotions that I've clearly been suppressing in an attempt to "prepare for the worst!" I'm also now allowing myself to get excited - how's your "wedmin" going? (Stealing that btw!!)
@TheDogsMother get on the gin! With a bit of yoga to take the edge off - but in all seriousness, I did find exercise and a lot of time for myself really did help the nerves.

Ratchet101 glad to hear you’re able to get excited too at last! I think everything is done here so just trying to sleep and eat well for a couple of days now. I had been sleeping fine up until this week but now I’m definitely tossing and turning a bit.

I am definitely looking forward to Saturday but in the nicest possible way will feel so relieved when it’s over!

@CoronaBride2020 @Ratchet101 You are nearly there!! I hope you are both properly excited now and have both have an absolutely wonderful day tomorrow. Please come back and let us know how you feel when it's all done!!

(In the meantime I will be crossing my fingers, clutching my penis straw and bottle of gin for another 12 weeks 😩)

Thank you gurglebelly! Currently sat in our wedding suite unable to quite believe we’ve made it this far! It’s been a non stop afternoon of welcoming family and getting everyone into their various accommodations, but it’s just been so lovely to see everyone after such a long time.

I’m really nervous but I think it’s just regular bride nerves now rather than special corona-bride-brand nerves!

Ratchet101 hope you’re getting excited now too!

Thanks @gurglebelly!!!
We are also in our wedding suite! I am full on now nervously excited like @CoronaBride2020 said, regular bride nerves. Small part of me just can't believe it's happening...

@CoronaBride2020 Have an amazing time tomorrow too and sending so much love for keeping me sane over the past two weeks.

Eeeeek, past midnight, officially wedding day, need to get some sleep! Xxxx

Typing this while my HUSBAND (!!!) snores next to me... feels wrong to be mumsnetting on my wedding night but I’m still awake so thought I’d update you!

Well... I’m married! And I did manage to enjoy the day, but honestly, I’m just so glad it’s over. He feels exactly the same too.

I woke up feeling really good but then we had a family emergency at the last minute which meant one of our most important guests couldn’t come, which was such a curveball and it really sent me into a tailspin I sat there hating every minute of getting my makeup done and honestly just wanted to give up on the whole thing, but then my sisters arrived and perked me up and we went on to have a nice day. We had some of our closest friends watching the ceremony on Zoom which was really lovely and helped to create a really fun atmosphere.

The moment before our guests were allowed into the ceremony room was so nerve wracking that I didn’t feel like I’d be able to do it, but then I managed to get a grip and actually really enjoyed the ceremony itself. We then had a bit of a walk to get from the ceremony to the reception and so many strangers were clapping and cheering and congratulating us in the street which was amazing.

When we sat down for lunch I realised I was simultaneously starving (I had barely eaten all day from nerves) and so nauseous (also from nerves) I couldn’t even look at the food, so I excused myself with one of my bridesmaids for a bit and munched on some plain bread to settle my stomach and then managed to get back in there. I was so embarrassed but the staff and all our guests were so nice about it!

All in all it was a really special day and the circumstances made it so meaningful, and a day we will truly remember forever. But yeah, also stressful AF

I’m so happy to be married to him now though and it’s true that ultimately that’s all that matters!

Ratchet101 hope you had an amazing day and looking forward to hearing about it!

Thank you all for helping me get over the line these past couple of weeks. Having other brides to vent to has really been the lifeline I needed!!

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

We did it!!

Yaaaaaaaaaaaay!

@gurglebelly you're on the home stretch!! I'm so excited for you

@CoronaBride2020 Similar vibes, we had a last minute cancellation that disappointed us BUT we had the most amazing day. It was always going to be a hard day as my mum died a couple of years ago so the tears were well and truly flowing, but there was so much love (and relief!!!) in the room. I'm still awake, in shock that the day happened. My HUSBAND (teehee!!!) is snoring away non the wiser, but we are both just so happy to finally get here. We had dreadful weather, but we had people cheering and applauding at we battled our way through the rain to the venue and back out again all dressed up!

Although this was not the wedding we envisaged, there was so much love in the room and it felt like such a blessing to be there with all our nearest and dearest.

To everyone on this group, you have been my lifeline. I'm so grateful to have found this group to keep me calm (keep me sane!!!) and I wish all the love in the world to you all.

For years I have hear couples say, to just enjoy the day and take it all in as best you can because it will be over in an instant. They are so right, sadly these are more unusual times, so we will spend more time worrying that a ceremony could even take place. It took a moment to realise, that this was it, the moment we had been waiting for, and it was gone so quickly!

I still can't believe it all happened but we really did have the most amazing day.

@Wineneeded247 you're up!!!! Enjoy!

@CoronaBride2020 my wedding twin! I sorry you also had a last minute change of plan, but I'm so thrilled for you.

It has been quite the journey and certainly one to tell for many years! Thank you for creating this thread, it has been a great place to vent! All these weddings taking place have also provided so much light in such an unusual time of uncertainty and worry and fear. I for one think it's lovely we're trying salvage what we can from 2020.

@Ratchet101and @CoronaBride2020, congratulations !!!! So happy that it all went ahead for you and both your days sounded lovely. Four days to go for me and I'm worried with all the Covid changes and controls that are in place that it could be a bit of a joyless affair. I'm also very sad that we won't be able to mingle with our guests though our tables will be 2m apart. I guess when it gets going and you are surrounded by your favourite people it all comes together. I tried my dress on for the first time since February and I'm not sure about it now . Too late to start shopping for another one so I just need to get on with it. Anyway once again congratulations. I'm so pleased you made it in the end.

@TheDogsMother are you tomorrow?? How are you feeling?!

I’ve been away on ‘honeymoon’ for a few days and it’s been wonderful but quite excited to get home and resume normal life now without wedding anxiety hanging over me!

For years I have hear couples say, to just enjoy the day and take it all in as best you can because it will be over in an instant. They are so right, sadly these are more unusual times, so we will spend more time worrying that a ceremony could even take place. It took a moment to realise, that this was it, the moment we had been waiting for, and it was gone so quickly!

I felt exactly the same @Ratchet101 and I feel like I should feel bad for kind of wishing the day away, but honestly, I don’t. It had just been so much stress to get there that I just hadn’t had time to properly look forward to it at all. It wasn’t until 3 days before that I even let myself relax a little and start to believe it was happening! And then there was all the upset first thing in the morning on the day itself. I just couldn’t properly enjoy it all, although I did have some really lovely moments! And we’ve seen a sneak peek of a few photos and I look lovely and happy and relaxed in all of them, which is hilarious because my stomach was doing backflips the entire day!

@CoronaBride2020 Yes its tomorrow !! I know what you mean, the anxiety has been a bit overwhelming then all the Covid measures feel like they are slightly sucking the joy out of it all. Add guests and I'm sure it will all be fine. It's a bit mad really but I am looking forward to relaxing afterwards without the worry of will it or won't it happen. I must slow down and enjoy the day. On a more minor level I have discovered a massive bruise on my shin, got a bloodshot eye and a red rash on my neck. Pretty bride . Wonderful DP has just given me my wedding present though. A trip to Tenerife in March. He's a keeper.

@TheDogsMother Happy wedding day!! Hope you're having the most amazing day - can't wait to hear all!

We're still on a bit of a mini moon (albeit our last day) and still giggle at calling ourselves husband and wife, still not said it properly to anyone yet! The relief that we can relax into it all now is indescribable - @TheDogsMother enjoy hun!! Xxxx

Thank you @Ratchet101. We're at the venue, most of the photos done, guests arriving soon and ceremony at 3. I was very nervous but a couple of glasses of fizz has helped. The venue has done a lovely job and the florist too so very happy all things considered. Congratulations to you two. Husband and wife 🥂

I need a rant! Looks like we might go into lockdown for a month next week and I have various wedding stuff booked (dress fittings, hair trials etc) which we most likely won't be able to do!! FFS at this rate I'll be wearing a dress that doesn't fit in January 😫

Don’t panic just yet gurglebelly! Well ok, that’s a silly thing to say as of course you’re going to panic, I would too! But depending on how the lockdown takes place, your trials and fittings etc might still be able to happen!

I ended up skipping the final fitting for my dress and just had them send it to me as I was sick of the uncertainty and wanted to just have it here. Was a bit risky but it fitted fine in the end. Really hope you get yours sorted too!

@TheDogsMother I hope you had a wonderful day, CONGRATULATIONS!

Well we had a wonderful day. A little Covid restricted but I think everyone had a great time. We certainly did. The venue, florist and photographer did a great job.

I'm now sitting in bed at the hotel next to my HUSBAND !!! eating chocolate and watching the Simpsons. The perfect start to married life 🤣

@gurglebelly please don't panic. Easy for me to say now but I'm sure it will all be fine. Please keep in touch as I would love to hear that it's all gone well for you.

@gurglebelly I think like everyone has already said, the best thing is to try to stay positive, but to be prepared for all instances! I think we can all agree all our days were far from what we imagined but there were just certain aspects/elements to the day that we had to work around. I would say to just keep plowing on with all your organising like nothing has changed, but stay in touch with all your suppliers but for your own sake and peace of mind, start to be realistic about what parts you really wouldn't mind if you had to not include or change. Like @CoronaBride2020 said with her dress fitting, you can just leave last minute details that will probably be just fine, but have a chat and see what your options could be if you ended up taking your dress as is. I ended up doing my own hair and makeup but got the hairdresser to do trial runs weeks before so I could recreate something similar on my own as I knew she would not be able to do it for me on the day (our hotel would not allow it!). I would just say have (another!!) contingency plan for everything and it will be ok. I really do think they are trying their very best for weddings to continue best they can but it may not be the day you thought it was be even 8 weeks ago... It will all work out - I have all fingers and toes crossed for you!! Xx