"Please respect our beautiful day by not posting photos on social media"

[CoffeeCakePlease]

I've thought a lot about pictures of our wedding day doing the rounds on social media posted by the guests (if some of our family are anything to go by they will probably be online before the speeches) but, I've made my peace with it as I feel putting any sort of notice up (like the subject line above) has an air of 'fun police' about it. I saw this notice on a wedding 'for sale' post on Facebook Marketplace.

How do others feel about this? Are you bothered that pictures of you will be up and potentially seen by people you don't know? Do you care? Or if you are a user of social media would you rather be the 'first' to put a picture up of you and new husband/wife and let all the others then follow?

I'm not a huge sharer on Facebook, so envisage putting about 5 of the professional ones on my Facebook profile and keeping the rest private/for family and close friends to see only. But obviously the photographers photos will won't be ready until a few weeks after.

I find 'requests' that are impossible to police a bit laughable; if I saw that notice at a wedding I'd straight away think "what will they do if people do? take their phone from them? never speak to them again??" ... yet in an ideal world I wouldn't have guests share pictures of us (don't mind about themselves all dolled up) as its a 'private' celebration in the sense that its invite only, like all weddings I guess!

Well you could ask mot to have photos of the bride and groom, but surely guests can posts photos of themselves, venue, cake etc?

why not go with a non wanky request. "Please don't put pictures of us online, we're too shy"

I think this this is getting more common. I've been to a couple and as far as I know everyone complied. It was nice for the B and G to post an 'official' nice pic they chose first, before the blurry pissed up photos from midnight went online

or go for funny " please don't put pictures of us online. I've been on the run for years now and don't want my cover blown"

Go for it OP, great idea. Not fun police at all. Hate being told by randoms they have seen my photo on Facebook.

If I saw that sign I wouldn’t know if that meant no photos of anyone including myself or no photos of the bride and groom and as vain as it sounds I’d be a bit disappointed that I’d be worried about posting a picture of me looking my best in case I’d gotten it wrong.
I’m quite private about photos going online but I didn’t really care about my wedding day and as far as I remember people only put photos of themselves all dressed up on there and then I put some of the professional ones on there.

I'd prefer to not have any pictures of me on social media, but seems in my social circle and with family too that sharing pictures is a must for them, so I'm always sort of viewed as awkward or like OP said fun police for saying anything or asking regardless of how I say it. So I've given up...
Will be the same for the wedding later on this year.

If it could be policed it wouldn't be a request, it would be an order.

I don't use SM very much, and didn't post any pictures of my wedding. Other people did and I wasn't bothered by it.

If I was at a wedding where the couple had requested this I would respect their wishes. Not out of fear of consequences, but because ignoring such a polite request that costs me nothing but is clearly important to them would be a really short thing to do to a friend.

Our priest kindly asked the congregation to respect our decision in regards to social media. We didn't say it on the invites but have friends who have. I think it is good manners to not upload pictures of someone's wedding on social media, even worse is a guest uploading images before the bride or groom have had the chance (if they choose to).

In one case the ban was only until the evening guests arrived which I thought was fair enough, the other was just until the B and G had chance to post something. Not a forever ban.

Short?
shitty
No idea why my phone is so polite!

We asked people not to put photos of us on social media during our wedding and I don’t think anyone minded - certainly not aware of any distressed guests as a result! I think we just did it verbally though (4 years ago so can’t really remember).

We also don’t post pictures of the baby online, and ask that others don’t either - I feel like he’s too young to consent to his image being shared or decide who it’s shared with, and it’s not my place to make that call on his behalf. If people think we’re wankers (entirely possible!! ), they haven’t felt it strongly enough to object or share their disapproval.

I really think one bonus of living in a relatively narcissistic society is that most people are too wrapped up in themselves/their own image to be too worried about yours. Be polite and kind, but do what feels right for you. The idea upthread about ‘no pictures on social media please, we’re too shy’ has a nice light tone whilst being clear about your preferences.

And have a glorious wedding!

I wouldn't like it and am aware of 'stealing thunder' when I go to friends' weddings or hear about pregnancies, births or deaths. Until I see something from them, I refrain from posting anything. My mother-in-law took it upon herself to announce my wedding in the local paper, used a really awful photo, put in details I didn't necessarily want people to know and spelled my sister's name wrong. Thank Christ she's not on social media!

I'd take it as a signal to post photos I hadn't previously intended to post. My friends asked us not to put pics of her in her dress on FB until after she had but everything else was fair game.

I couldn't care less if my guests want to post pictures blurry, drunken or anything else.
I'm not going to be paid thousands for Hello magazine for exclusives.

Hopefully it's the one time when everyone and everything in my life are looking and feeling on top form! Share away!

I'm not bothered about the reception, but I feel that people snapping cameraphones in church is quite disrespectful. Luckily our vicar agrees with me and she's going to politely tell people so before I arrive

That said, I have tag review on Facebook, so while mutual friends would be able to see the photo, it doesn't mean it's 'linked' to me until I have a chance to check social media.

We asked for no pics of us on social media. Fine with people posting selfies etc.

No problem at all, everyone was fine about it.

I've seen various people on FB asking for photos not to be posted on the day of the wedding or til the Bride & groom post something.

I think a total ban would be hard to police and I must admit i love seeing wedding photos of aquantances etc when I'm not at the wedding

I got married before Facebook thank goodness so didn't have this problem. I think I would feel the same way though. We did ask for no photos apart from the official photographer during the church service though. The vicar was quite happy to announce this and make it seem like the request was his idea too.

My db and dsil had a ‘no photos that haven’t been sent to and approved by the brides mother couple on SM’ rule which was a real pita as they had a destination wedding. There were loads of family and friends back home who would have loved to go but couldn’t and who would have felt a bit involved if they hadn’t had to wait weeks for the pictures.

For my wedding we have a ‘do as you please’ in regards to what people want to post and when but we aren’t having anyone for the evening that isn’t going to be there for the day. I absolutely hate having my picture taken though so an outright ban seems preferable to me

I wanted to ask people not to for mine, but my husband thought it would go down badly. We compromised and asked for no photos during the ceremony, which everyone respected. I have to say I'm quite glad I gave in, because some of the guest photos are really nice and I might not have seen them if they weren't on Facebook.
I agree with you though, it's quite irritating when you find some randoms you've never met have commented on photos of you in your wedding dress before you've even seen them. it's always the same three old dears as well. I suppose in the old days they would have just lurked behind their net curtains

I posted something like "everyone who is coming to the daytime part of the wedding please can you refrain from posting anything on social media before the nightime guests arrive" many thanks.Noone had an issue at all

Our registrar asked our guests not to share photos of the bridal party online until we had, but they were welcome to put up pictures of themselves. I'm quite private and didn't want our whole day plasterered online.

I dont understand why TBH. But I would respect it because generally I go to weddings of people I like/respect/love and think I’m fairly polite!