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Original poster

How do I not become a blubbering mess during our vows.....

27 replies

Tobleronemonster · 30/04/2018 15:01

.....and speeches Confused

Honestly, the closer it's getting, the more I'm realising it's entirely possible I might make an absolute tit out of myself, from walking down the aisle, to saying our vows, to the speeches, by blubbing through the whole thing.

I'm fairly sure DP will be similar and it's just not practical Grin

Does anyone have any tips on how to limit the emotions? Should we practice beforehand? Should I focus really hard on something that really winds me up about her? Grin

Seriously! Any tips will be VERY much appreciated!

TIA

OP posts:
RhubarbYoghurt · 30/04/2018 15:06

I am the most emotional person in the world. Cried about everything. I genuinely thought I'd cry all through my wedding and I didn't. I grinned from beginning to end Grin

AnneOfCleavage · 30/04/2018 15:10

I was so emotional the week leading up to the wedding I think I was "cried out" as it were. No waterworks on the day from me but DH was a bit emotional in the Church. I am the worlds biggest cry baby and literally cry at all movies or if other people are crying and unbelievably I was fine so suggest you cry lots before the big day - so worked for me.

Good luck and congratulations.

Original poster
Tobleronemonster · 30/04/2018 15:19

Ah, this may bode well for me then, because I'm already crying at everything! I only need to think about the wedding and I can feel myself welling up. I'm the kind of person who cries at weddings as a plus one. I.e, I don't even really know the couple!

So basically, I should just cry between now and July and I'll be fine on the day! Grin

OP posts:
iffyjiffybag · 30/04/2018 15:34

I know of a person who arranged for the 'absent friends' part of the toast to be left out because they really feared they wouldn't be able to keep it together otherwise. Their DF had died six months earlier.

mrssunshinexxx · 30/04/2018 15:36

I could of written this I well up at the thought of me waiting outside with my dad waiting to walk down eeeeeek

Original poster
Tobleronemonster · 30/04/2018 16:10

sunshine, oh god, yes, the waiting!Confused 😖

OP posts:
Tamingoftheglue · 30/04/2018 16:39

I am the most overly emotional person. Cry at everything. I was perfectly calm all morning getting ready in the run up to the wedding. Everyone kept commenting on how I was so chilled. Then we arrived at church. Vicar came outside to greet us, asked if we were all ok and I practically yelled in his face "no vicar I'm shitting myself!" Poor man Grin

I had to look down at the floor as I came into church because I knew that looking at everyone would make me cry. My husband already had tears in his eyes and i had a wobble then. I cried a bit during one of the readings but otherwise beamed all the way through and didn't fluff my vows at all. I thought I'd be sobbing but I honestly have never been so sure of anything I've said and the nerves just dissolved. It sounds cliché but it was like we were the only 2 people in the room.

During the speeches, my husband sobbed like a baby and I had to take over his speech.

Original poster
Tobleronemonster · 30/04/2018 17:33

"no vicar I'm shitting myself!" Haha love that! Well, he did ask Grin Yes, I think I'll be doing the looking down at the floor thing too. What did you do during your vows? I think I'd be fine facing the registrar, but actually saying them to my dp is going to be very difficult.

OP posts:
Tamingoftheglue · 30/04/2018 18:41

During the vows, I faced my husband the whole time. I thought I'd cry but I had no trouble looking him in the eyes at all.

CurlsLDN · 30/04/2018 18:49

I cried all the way through my ceremony and speeches! It didn't matter, have your bridesmaids loaded up with tissues so they can pass them to you and you can delicately dab under your eyes. Everyone seemed very charmed by me crying!
The crying is somewhat infectious, my dad and quite a number of the rest of the guests were set off by seeing me cry, so if it's ok for those men in suits to cry, it's definitely ok for a beautiful bride to show her emotions. Who wants to be a tense, stiff robot on their wedding day?!

paap1975 · 30/04/2018 18:52

I am terrified of this too, especially as I am ugly as hell when I cry. I cried all day when my sister got married and I am convinced our wedding photos are going to be completely ruined. I am thinking of asking my GP to prescribe something, but I don't even know if such a thing exists.
Currently I am crying at potential wedding music, writing my vows, proof reading the ceremony, thinking of the wedding, anything really. The wedding is at the end of June!!!

myhousesmellsofIKEA · 30/04/2018 18:57

Are you getting married in a church? Our vicar did a practice run with us both the night before. Walked down the aisle and recited our vows (well the vicar told us what we were going to say). Only way I got through it on the day: have a good cry during the rehearsal!

LRL2017 · 30/04/2018 18:58

I'm the same but didn't cry! I was more nervous about getting uncontrollable giggles (i didn't thankfully!)

Original poster
Tobleronemonster · 01/05/2018 10:08

"Currently I am crying at potential wedding music" Me too, paap Confused Grin

I need to choose between two versions of an instrumental of our song, which just so happens to be incredibly emotional. I'm setting myself up for a fall here aren't I? If only the Benny Hill theme was our song Grin

my house, no, not getting married in a church (not allowed Hmm ) but I think practicing beforehand is a good idea.

OP posts:
K80E · 01/05/2018 10:20

OP if your the bride then you don't need to make a speech so it's ok!

Original poster
Tobleronemonster · 01/05/2018 10:58

Well I'm one of the brides, so neither of us would traditionally make a speech, but I guess one of us should, otherwise it might be rude. Think this will be DP's job Wink but I'm still likely to cry at everyone else's speeches!

OP posts:
RoundaboutSnail · 01/05/2018 11:41

It doesn't matter at all if you cry. It's pretty unlikely you'll cry solidly all through the day, so don't worry too much! Yes, it seems likely you will cry at the first emotional moment, and it might last a few minutes, but would be longer if you struggle to prevent it. So assume you will cry. Then if you do, you can think "OK, so what if I shed some tears, I'm still here, nothing bad happened" and continue to enjoy your day SmileWineThanks

4mogirl · 01/05/2018 12:04

I thought I was going to cry, but ended up getting a fit of the giggles instead! Almost in hysterics, but not quite.
It started when my heel started sinking into the gap between two paving slabs in our outdoor garden setting. Then secondly, I looked over at our best man who was frantically trying to silently get the plastic wrapping off the cushion to hold the rings ( he should have done it hours before, but hey ho!) I knew the part in the vows was coming up when we needed the rings and his panicked expression and urgency just tipped me over the edge!
I’m the photos I’m happily smiling/laughing, so that’s better then crying!
Best wishes for your day, I’m sure you will be fine!Smile

Original poster
Tobleronemonster · 04/05/2018 10:03

"It's pretty unlikely you'll cry solidly all through the day" I bloody hope so, Round.

girl, that tickled me Grin You could go either way with that couldn't you? Complete rage or hysterics. Glad it was the latter.

I'm genuinely thinking about having different aisle music . Dp isn't in agreement and thinks we should just have our song, because we're not having a first dance. It's really beautiful, but it's just so emotional, as I said.

OP posts:
mrssunshinexxx · 04/05/2018 14:31

Op would you please share your walking down the aisle song I'm struggling so much !!! I understand if u don't want to! X

4mogirl · 05/05/2018 23:06

I know you asked for the OP’s walking down the aisle song, but mine was Shania Twain’s ‘From this moment on’

Original poster
Tobleronemonster · 06/05/2018 10:06

mrssunshine, do you mean you're struggling to find a song or with being emotional?

OP posts:
mrssunshinexxx · 07/05/2018 20:16

Op a song for walking down the aisle x
4mo that's our first dance 😍💕

4mogirl · 07/05/2018 21:28

Aaahhhh, lovely!!! Smile

mrssunshinexxx · 08/05/2018 15:00

Any walking down the aisle suggestions 4mo perhaps we have similar taste ?! Xx

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