I don't like wedding dresses :(

[Sarsaparilllla]

Ugh, been out again today looking at wedding dresses and I just don't like anything, I just don't think wedding dresses suit me, they make me feel fat and hardly any seem to have straps and I don't like the strapless look (don't think it's flattering on me at all on me)

I just feel so deflated about it all, I thought wedding dress shopping was supposed to be fun and I just feel really down about it :(

Fed up, not sure what the point of this post it, just wanted to moan!!

Go to an evening dress shop and look for a different dress then ! Or go to a dress maker and work out with them what you want. But I looked at every shop in 7 counties before I found mine (which was straight with long sleeves), and as I learnt what I didn't like I'd march in and say 'no bling, no strapless, no foofy stuff, what ya got' and then they'd go ummmm and at least it was quick

What's your budget and what area do you live in?

Any particulr look / shape / features you would like on a dress?

Have you tried Droopy & Brown in York? Beautiful classic plain dresses, and if you want v expensive gorgeous dresses look at Neil Cunningham!

Mine was neither of these as waaaaay over my budget!

I think Monsoon bridal wear is lovely and a bit different from the normal strapless bore-a-thon that is your typical wedding dress selection.

Goodness, this brings back memories! I got married over 20 years ago when there was nothing but 'meringues' on offer and I became stressed (to the point of being covered in a rash) at my inability to find anything that suited me. I finally found an ivory Chanel-style suit which I loved, and the rash disappeared immediately! Everyone thought it looked great, I wore it again and best of all it hasn't dated in the photos!

Anyway, this is about you, not me, so... don't panic, don't do yourself down, and do be prepared to think outside the box -there will be something out there that is
just right for you, it is maybe just different to the usual dresses - you can be an individual without being outrageous. Chin up and good luck with the search!

Thanks folks :) It just seems like every dress in every shop is strapless and glittery blingy and just not me at all. I've never been the kind of person who's dreamed of a big white dress!!

I'll have a look at Monsoon, good idea :) OMG I just looked at the Neil Cunningham website, they are beautiful!! Much more my thing but out of my price range :(

I'm in Manchester, I like a vintagey/lacey kind of look rather than satin finish and I'm not against some detail but maybe beaded rather than blingy - if that makes sense?

My budget is about £1,000 but if I found something I really liked I'm prepared to pay more

I've found pictures of things I like but they always seem to be on websites where you can only order rather than go and try on and I don't like ordering clothes online at the best of times

I got mine in the phase eight sale, thanks to a suggestion on MN.

www.phase-eight.co.uk/fcp/categorylist/garment/wedding?resetFilters=true

Oh they're lovely!! I know they do Phase 8 in a couple of department stores near here, I'll see if they stock the bridal range :)

Sarsaparilllla,

I agree, I dont like the typical wedding dress, and like to be covered up (strapless or spaghetti straps is a definite no).

My suggestions are:

1. Buy vintage (I did and then got it altered by a dress maker to fit perfectly!)
2. Find a design you like, and take it to a dressmaker
3. Highstreet
4. Keep looking in wedding dress shops, eventually you might find the dress. My friend did this and had it all altered (long train made into a puddle train, straps added).
5. Buy a bridesmaid dress (with straps) in ivory, and then splash out on diamonds and amazing shoes.
6. Sample shops
7. The internet (ebay and preloved)

The dresses below are in Harvey Nicks:

www.bcbg.com/family/index.jsp?categoryId=4370155&cp=2769162&clickid=cat_leftnav_txt

I love my dress, my dress and veil comes in at £400, but I've then spent £600 on jewellery and shoes which I can wear and again.

Good luck!

What sort of wedding are you having? Does it have to be traditional? I got married in a black cocktail dress.

You don't have to shop in wedding dress shops, or wear a 'weddingy' wedding dress. I can't stand the things either, and my single trying-on session in Pronuptia just made me feel ill. Work out what suits you, what you like, then go forth and find it wherever it exists.

I wore a Vivian of Holloway 50s-style dress for my wedding and the whole thing (dress and underskirt) cost £150. It also meant my day of dress shopping with my bridesmaids consisted of going to the shop, trying it on, saying 'yes, I'll have that', paying, then going to the pub

What size are you? I have a beautiful vintage dress to sell, it has long sleeves but they are narrow made of kind of muslin and the dress is kind of drapey (it does have a train, but is not at all poofy). It was never worn - apparently the bride changed her mind! Cost about 1,000 ten years ago. Has been in storage since. I think it's a 14.

White dress ££££££ because it's a wedding dress, any other coloured dress which could be worn to a wedding not £££££.
When the DD's get married I am having a dress made for them in whatever colour they like and then I am booking a meal for 50 people, the W word will not be mentioned because all it does is add £££££'s.

oooh Ishani, I like your suggestion.

I always think a wedding should be relaxed and fun, some of the best I have been to have been in a village hall, with good food and lots of drink.

I didnt want to spend a fortune on a dress, I would wear for 12 hours. I think I still look great though. Like the Vivienne Holloway dress.

I was looking around at wedding dresses on that Kate thread and came to the conclusion that most wedding dresses just don't look very god. Maybe white just isn't that flattering a colour for a lot of people? But in any case if the rich and famous can't get it right with all the cash at their disposal don't feel bad if you are struggling! Plus there is all that expectation that choosing the dress must be fantastic fun and that you should look the best you have ever/will ever look in the dress.

I wore my mother's wedding dress (it was supposed to make her feel happier, but didn't really work very well) If I got married again i think I'd just look for something that I liked in a style and colour totally of my choice. My sister got married in bright orange silk and I thought she looked great!

I got married in 1987 and every wedding dress was a huge white meringue. I bought a bridesmaid dress instead in cerise.

If you want to try vintage go to Afflecks Palace.

i went to a wedding dress shop which was just owned by one woman. she had a number of dresses but just designed one for me. i knew i wanted thick straps which is what i got.
it didn't cost too much - £500 in 2003, so not the cheapest option but not the priciest either. could have had it for less had i picked cheaper material etc.

too many people wear what they think they should, rather than what they love. I looked at wedding gowns and felt nothing.

I wanted to get married in white (hypocrite that I am with 2yo DS ) so I'm
waltzing up the register office corridor in this with a white vest, white maxi skirt and my granny's pearls. I am genuinely thrilled, which is how a bride should feel, right? I'd have felt like a twat in a satin frock.

What do you really love to wear, money no object?

Here are some I like:

Damsel in a dress

Lovely Biba

Biba again

Coast

Probably over budget but some great dresses

If you do want to do the gorgeous frock thing but want something a bit alternative, there are some gorgeous ones on shopbop - US site tho.

oooh, some great suggestions.

chrisonabike - love the jacket and accessories. You need to wear what you feel comfortable in.

Personally, the big fussy dress does nothing for me.

teenyweenytadpole - YGM :o I am about a 14!!

I feel so much better about this now, thankyou people of MN :)

I think Chrisonabike you've got it there, people must think they have to wear these dresses rather than something they love? I'd never normally wear anything strapless or covered in glitter, why should I start on my wedding day

Some fantastic suggestions, thankyou all, I'm starting to think going vintage is the way forward, or possibly getting something made.

We're having a church service, which is what my DP wants, but I want a relaxed reception, I don't really want top tables and formal stuff. I think part of my problem with the dresses I've seen so far is that I never imagined I'd get married in a church, and I don't want it to turn into a formal affair at all

It's also worth having a look on Etsy - there are loads of independent designers selling through there and I've seen some stunning wedding dresses. You can have whatever you want made, as unfussy or spectacular as you like. Prices also range accordingly, so if budget is an issue there should be something to suit.

Ah, I'd never thought of etsy, another fab suggestion, thankyou :)

There are some good 'alternative' wedding blogs around as well. I loved Offbeat Bride when I was planning my wedding, also Rock'n'Roll Bride. They can make you go a bit mental though - I suddenly started feeling like I had to handcraft 150 celebration flags or something