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Original poster

Country house hotel for maiden aunt??

59 replies

Stopsnowing · 13/05/2021 22:19

Want to take elderly aunt for dinner and over night stay in country house hotel near London. Just looking for a peaceful place with good food, garden and nice rooms. No need for spa etc. Nothing too fancy. Must have lifts or ground floor bedroom. Any ideas?

OP posts:
LawnFever · 14/05/2021 07:48

You lost me at maiden aunt, what a bizarre, outdated and sexist phrase.

Charlottejbt · 14/05/2021 07:51

I second St Michaels Manor. My brother's wedding reception was there and it was beautiful.

Lol at "Room with a View". I actually thought of "Hotel du Lac"- protagonist definitely not a "maiden", but there's a kind of old fashioned vibe about the OP which seemed a bit Anita Brookner. :)

KidneyBeans · 14/05/2021 08:14

@Stopsnowing

Thanks for all the helpful comments! More relevant than maiden is elderly and quite infirm hence lift needed and peaceful vibe- nothing trendy. Ideally somewhere to sit and have tea/read a book looking over the garden/have a Sherry before dinner
Then why mention her sexual history? Confused It's totally irrelevant.
aweegc · 14/05/2021 08:22

She might not be a "maiden", she might very well be a fully sexual lesbian who is in the closet because of her age. She might actually have lost a love early in life that you know nothing about.

Either way, it STILL has no relevancy to her accommodation preferences on a weekend break!

Probably best to stop referring to your aunt - an adult woman - by how you perceive her sexual history to be.

Loads of the hotel suggestions are nice.

WhoNeedsaManOfTheWorld · 14/05/2021 08:25

Does she know how you refer to her?

WhoNeedsaManOfTheWorld · 14/05/2021 08:27

I hope she runs off with a cad or a bounder at said hotel Grin

Oenanthe · 14/05/2021 08:28

I'm willing to bet she was a right goer, back in the fifties.

RockingMyFiftiesNot · 14/05/2021 08:30

I think OP has probably got the message by now about how she referred to her aunt.
Maybe allow the thread to go back to the hotels discussion.

BTW I have a relative who never married who refers to herself as a maiden aunt. It actually just means an older aunt who never married if we're going to be pedantic. Nothing to do with sexual history.

Bluntness100 · 14/05/2021 08:33

@LawnFever

You lost me at maiden aunt, what a bizarre, outdated and sexist phrase.
I know. I’m stunned anyone would write it. It’s absolutely nothing to do with where to take her. It’s so full of judgement and totally sexist.

Thought we’d moved past this nonsense decades ago.

CaptainMyCaptain · 14/05/2021 08:33

Maiden aunt? My immediate response was to take her somewhere like Fawlty Towers - in the early 70s.

Original poster
Stopsnowing · 14/05/2021 08:35

Folks, my aunt would refer to herself as a maiden aunt. She never married.
As a result she has a very close relationship with me and her other nieces and nephews. She is much loved. We don’t want to be in a hotel with weddings or romantic couples. More a place where Miss Marple would feel at home, we can sit in the library and do a crossword or play some cards.
Any more ideas for hotels gratefully received.

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 14/05/2021 08:35

BTW I have a relative who never married who refers to herself as a maiden aunt. It actually just means an older aunt who never married if we're going to be pedantic. Nothing to do with sexual history

Literally yes. Figuratively and in common language it insinuates sexual history. It’s a term long outdated that has no place in todays society

TheQueef · 14/05/2021 08:35

OP, maiden in this case refers to your Aunts hymen, her maidenhead, her virginity.
You will also be handed your arse if you refer to any advance in years.

Crack on, good luck Grin

Bluntness100 · 14/05/2021 08:36

Folks, my aunt would refer to herself as a maiden aunt

And that’s fine. It doesn’t mean you need to do it too to sixteen million people on line.

Original poster
Stopsnowing · 14/05/2021 08:36

Waits for the Miss Marple pile on.

OP posts:
DareIask · 14/05/2021 08:38

OP I read your Maiden Aunt as being a rather affectionate term for a genteel, quiet and reserved elderly lady.

Back to the hotel recommendations...

Neonprint · 14/05/2021 08:44

Why would you call her maiden? How vile.

RockingMyFiftiesNot · 14/05/2021 08:47

@Bluntness100

BTW I have a relative who never married who refers to herself as a maiden aunt. It actually just means an older aunt who never married if we're going to be pedantic. Nothing to do with sexual history

Literally yes. Figuratively and in common language it insinuates sexual history. It’s a term long outdated that has no place in todays society

Interestingly Google doesn't seem to agree with you. Nor does the Guardian
RedRec · 14/05/2021 08:51

Oh dear, you are getting a pile on here from the language police. Hope you have a lovely time with your dear aunt Flowers

Wineat5isfine · 14/05/2021 08:53

Both Cliveden House in Taplow and Danesfield House, just outside of Marlow are wonderful.

Bluntness100 · 14/05/2021 08:57

@RedRec

Oh dear, you are getting a pile on here from the language police. Hope you have a lovely time with your dear aunt Flowers
The issue is when you use a sexist term against a woman people will object, particularly other women. And that’s not wrong. In fact it’s wholly right that women put a stop to sexist behaviour and language when it is witnessed. Irrelevant of intent. It’s the same with many other things, another example would be racism. Even if the intent is not malicious you cannot allow it to continue without murmer.
Sharpkat · 14/05/2021 08:59

Luton Hoo. The Garden Wing has ground floor rooms. They have taxis to go between that area and the main house although it is not a long walk. Lots of history. Churchill made a speech there in 1948.

CMOTDibbler · 14/05/2021 09:01

Warners are adult only, no functions/conferences/weddings, and have some absolutely lovely hotels. Friends (who really don't do dc) stayed at Littlecote house a couple of years ago, and it certainly met your brief.

spotcheck · 14/05/2021 09:03

Maybe OP's aunt will be on the pull, and OP is wingman?

RockingMyFiftiesNot · 14/05/2021 09:23

The issue is when you use a sexist term against a woman people will object, particularly other women. And that’s not wrong. In fact it’s wholly right that women put a stop to sexist behaviour and language when it is witnessed. Irrelevant of intent. It’s the same with many other things, another example would be racism. Even if the intent is not malicious you cannot allow it to continue without murmer.

I agree with you totally and am one of the first to not stand by. I just don't agree with Maiden Aunt being wrong., i cannot find any evidence that maiden aunt means anything other than unmarried, which is a statement of fact. The Guardian article I linked to earlier would seem to support that - whatever you think of that newspaper, they are hardly likely to headline an article in 2020 with a sexist term. And if it truly was a sexist term that got past multiple editors, I would have expected it to hit the headlines in other newspapers.

I cannot tell you how many posts I have reported on MN and FB which are something-ist. This thread isn't one of them.