Is this too ‘babyish’ for secondary school?

[Snacktastic]

My DD is starting secondary school in September. We were browsing backpacks over the weekend. She’s absolutely loves this Jansport one. (Photo attached but may take a moment to approve). Is it going to be too young for secondary/ will she be teased for having a flowery bag?
Most of the secondary children I’ve seen have black backpacks, I’ve seen Nike etc which I’ve suggested but she doesn’t want plain black. If this is too young for secondary, I may have to tell her a white lie and that the uniform policy says it has to be a block colour!

Too geeky. Don’t make her a target.

It's fine, so many varieties of backpacks 🎒

My son liked a Hype one, he starts secondary in September. His older brother who is in year 10, told him he would get ripped if he went to school with the one he liked. It was colourful and busy in appearance. I felt really sad because there is nothing better than getting a new backpack and school things. It’s also sad that they are choosing their new gear with a year 6 mindset and I know personally that by Christmas my son won’t resemble the quirky, confident and animated little guy he is because they are so hard on them from the off in year 7, busy irradiating everything primary school and forcing them to grow up quickly and fit in with secondary standards. Needless to say, my guy who loves a pop of colour and likes to be different (and doesn’t care) has chosen a plain navy Converse backpack.

She may change it. Dd started with a lovely pink rucksack, quickly asked (within days) for a black one. She felt bigger girls noticing/ talking about it. Then moved eventually to more expensive black backpacks (waterproof- still sensible) and now is on the silly handbag thing that looks like it hurts and means she has to be careful about how much she carries. Gah. I hope your dd is strong enough to tough it through but they all end up looking identical.

I would check school uniform policy. Most state black back packs. If she’s unsure, she could wait until school starts to see what everyone else has before making a decision ?

Our school aren’t allowed patterned. Tell her she needs something plain. Sorry but it’s granny looking.

Teacher and DHOY of a year 7 cohort here.

That's delightful. Nice to see a bit of personality in these. Just double check uniform policy. Ours is strict on coats and things, not so much on bags.

My daughter chose a North Face bag for Year 7. It was supremely practical (roomy, lots of pockets, waterproof) but an unusual shape (quite boxy - think Deliveroo 🫣) and a bright neon colour. She did battle on through Year 7 with it but as the year went on it became clear that she had been the subject of some comments - her form tutor even gently mentioned it to me at one point (like she thought I’d foisted it on her, which I hadn’t at all - in fact I had warned her that she would stand out!). Now on year 8 and she has a plain black one - but not Nike, because she is not good with her belongings and I know she would get it mixed up with someone else’s. Plus a little bit of individuality is good - even if it’s a variation on a theme of a black rucksack!

My year 6 DD ditched her brand new Hype backpack in September, in favour of a handbag-style tote bag.

Ah this is a sad thread ☹️

But of an odd choice. Really old fashioned looking Light colour would probably get dirty or stain easily.

It's not babyish at all, I'm 40 and would happily use this bag! Surely liking what you like and not caring about other people's opinions is a good quality to nurture? I personally think it'd be a bit sad if you made her get a plain one.

Right 😔 Bit stunned at the number of people judging an 11 year old's style choice 🤨

The secondary school bus stop is outside my house and yesterday I walked past when picking up youngest from Primary.

There was a lot of black bags but also some pink, red, floral etc I would get it.

I wouldn't buy it, I've had two girls complete secondary school and a son there now. Children can be horrible these days about the most simple things.

I don’t think most people are being mean, but it is sad that it’s the norm for kids this age to do everything they can to punish individuality (aided by lots of very conformity-pushing school rules). For one thing having your own taste in bag helps you find your bag easily. And it should be a joy choosing a bag you like that expresses your taste and makes you happy. That shoul be part of the excitement and instead there’s a lot of justified fear of bullying.

I have an older DS now at university who has always been a bit eccentric and sailed through high school with a succession of colourful backpacks that he chose because he liked them. He did get bullied in first year but they stopped because he didn’t give a shit. If you really can style it out and ignore it, you get away with it or even set a trend. But that is very hard for most kids to do especially at a time of massive transition, hormonal stress etc. I would love every 12yo to not be a sheep and have the strength to stand out if they want to, but I think it’s also our job to help them avoid bullying if that’s what they need to do to get through it all.

I do think as they get older they become more forgiving and start to respect each other’s individuality more. My DD’s now in 6th form and they are so much nicer to each other because they’re more secure.

I remember the sheer joy of the new school year and buying a new pencil case or bag or some stationery. Oh the thrill of a brand new much coveted item. Please allow her to have it.

I'm a secondary school teacher and a bag does not make one babyish. We have year 7s who can't read, one who has a dummy, a couple who speak poorly and one who isn't yet continent. Nobody bullies them because they're good, kind people usually.

Those who are desperate to look the same, already wearing foundation and bending the rules around trousers vs leggings will flock together from the beginning. Your dd won't be in the loos vaping and applying false eyelashes with them. She'll be out there in the classroom grinning as she plunges her hand into an adored backpack.

Bullies don't bully because of their victims' choices; they bully because they're bullies.

What a depressing thread. It's a super cute bag. She has good taste. Nurture that!

It depends on the school. My DDs (leafy suburb state school) are very dismissive of the tote carriers, they say it's only the 'popular' girls that have them, i.e. the girls who follow a queen bee, and are constantly falling out with each other and are deeply unhappy. All the nice girls wear rucksacks because that's the sensible option if you're a conscientious student apparently. Reading this thread though I think it's the parents who influence this more than anything, so many people insisting their children conform.

Nothing wrong with it. Good on her for not following the trend

Schools here require black (or dark) rucksacks. We had one with reflective dots to make it easier to see.

I alway get a headache when I read how many rules there are in a school uniform policy. There are rules on the colour of the school bag?

I'd be more worried about the price. It's ok for secondary school.