When did you feel ready for visitors after a caesarean birth?

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when did you have people visit you after birth?

I live at the opposite end of the UK to half my family and on a different continent to the other half. All very keen to see the new baby and want to be here a week.

Having a c section. Did you have guests at the hospital? Or did you want none for the first week?

You have multiple people who want to come and stay in your house for a week, immediately after you give birth??

I was quite happy for visitors straight away but only because they stayed for a bit and then left

All I wanted after my c section was something to eat!!! I got....the entire family turning up. So sister and brother in law, teenage neice. Grandparents.Next day my parents. Not really what I wanted but everyone ignored my feelings. Was glad to see my parents tho as I was living a fair distance away from them

they're not saying with me just in my city. But they need to take off annual leave so I need to know when to invite them.

I had 2 fairly easy home births and I didn’t want any visitors for at least the first week. With eldest, I think our first visitors were at 10 days (MIL and great grandpa). My family lives overseas and my mum came at 6 weeks. It was planned like that so she’d probably arrive 2-3 weeks after the birth (staying with us), but I had dd at 37 weeks so it ended up being 6 weeks, which was also fine. With younger one, probably again around 2-3 weeks for first guests more just from a when people had time to visit standpoint as no local family. They came around when they had the time.

I had visitors at the hospital - not just family but friends too. I was so excited about my baby and couldn't wait to show him off to anyone who cared or was willing to pretend they cared! Did this with DS2 as well. Both were c-sections.

D-sis and D-BIL visited us at home from another continent when DS1 was born, and stayed with us for I think 5 days. I can't remember how soon after the birth it was but in the photos he still looks tiny so I reckon it was within 4-6 weeks.

How I felt about being so excited (desperate some might say!) to show my baby to people probably made it much easier for me to accept visitors at home & hospital than if you're someone who is happy for people to see baby all in good time, in which case I guess you might feel resentful and that could further impact how you feel about your physical recovery from the c-section. I seem to be in the minority re visitors after birth compared to most on MN anyway.

From a practical perspective, I'm glad my family stay occurred after I had established breast feeding and felt more comfortable doing that in front of others. AND once I was finding time to shower regularly!

I didn't have anyone is hospital. With DD1 that was 5 days and DD2 just 1 day.

I was happy for visitors at any point when we got home but I formula fed. Had I been trying to breastfeed I probably wouldn't have had anyone for a week or so.

what is the reason for not wanting people for a week or so?

So not c sections then? OP specified sections. ‘Fairly easy’ vaginal home births are different to major surgery in hospital.

I would say I was ok for visitors after 5 ish days. But I had a EMCS. My in-laws came the morning after and it was way, way too soon. I was a bit out of it and in a lot of pain. And they just wouldn't leave! Next time I won't be allowing anyone to come until 1. I'm no longer peeing into a paper bowl for the midwives to look at and 2. I've stopped farting after all the gas that they fill your stomach up with 🤣

I had vaginal birth (forceps) and we didn't have anyone visit for nearly a week. Didn't come home for 2 days anyway, then I was in a lot of pain and trying to establish breastfeeding with lots of skin to skin. I wouldn't plan for any visitors for a couple of weeks if they have to travel - why the rush - don't put pressure on yourself to feel up to it. Even when they do visit, make it clear it is very short visits, no meals provided.

Bleeding, boobs leaking, night sweats, baby blues, breastfeeding struggles, healing stitches on your bits or C-section site...

Some are fine with visits immediately, but also very understandable when some want a week to put themselves together again. I'm definitely in the second camp, although I loved showing my baby off after that!

1. You might want bedrest after major surgery
2. Establishing breastfeeding without spectators
3. Hormonal changes - likely to feel weepy and vulnerable
4. You and DP establishing a routine and bonding with baby
5. Not wanting people to hold baby
6. You'll feel more mobile when your stitches are out.

I had visitors in hospital and most days after. Would NOT do same again. Caused me big problems bonding with baby. Felt very dislocated.

You might be fine by the way. But if you get a choice, I'd give yourself a week to be on the safe side.

Give yourself at least a week OP....two if you can! You'll be pleased you did.

I feel pressured to give them a date as they need to book. I had this lovely vision of everyone coming to the hospital like in the movies! but then I would want a week to myself. Then I would want visitors but really everyone can only stay a week and would want to see the baby multiple times!

This is entirely one of those things that depends on the person and the visitors.

In my case, I didn't mind visitors and the like at all, and my parents visited when I was just a few days post partum (although they stayed with my sister, not me) and it was fine. But then, they're helpful and not demanding and were quite happy to sit around holding baby or making me tea or whatever. If my visitors had been the more demanding type, I would have felt very differently I suspect. Also, I'm quite comfortable around them in fairly simple clothes, and was always happy to hand baby to someone else for an hour so I could bath/shower whatever, but other people don't efel comofrtable with that.

The thing is movies are just movies.

In reality you may have lost a bit of blood, have any side effects from the anesthetic, be droopy, itchy, still with a catheter in, baby may be screaming and struggling to latch.

The anesthetic gave me massive stomach cramps and all I wanted to do was fart.

Of course you might be fine. But a lot of people after major surgery and with a new human to keep alive the last thing they want to do is have to speak to relatives.

I LOVE my family by the way.

Would you have visitors to the hospital if you'd had major abdominal surgery for another reason? Just wait, I feel like you are a bit oblivious to the reality of birth and a newborn. I remember getting up and literally bleeding all over the floor the day after I had my baby.

I was fine with family visiting straight away. After my section I had visitors at the hospital. My second was a vaginal birth and had visitors as soon as we got home. Nobody overstayed though, we had people coming and going in short bursts for a few days/weeks. Only family though, I wanted to wait a bit before seeing friends.

I think this very much depends on you and your family / hosting tradition. If you can lie on the sofa while they visit for an hour and see the baby, then there’s no issue having them come from day 1. If they expect a home cooked meal and you accompanying them for a walk through the city and generally to be entertained all day, then I’d wait for 2 weeks+. My family belongs to the first category so I had no issue with them being here from the start, it was quite helpful because my mum did some cooking for me.

OMG yes all the bodily fluids.

To be fair I remember going on maternity leave from work and telling my colleagues I'd see them in 2 weeks time as I'd come join for Friday drinks because the baby would be asleep in the evenings so I could come out.

I had NO IDEA.

We had a family member (male) staying with us when I had my first by c section. They had come up to help with some things prior to the birth and ended up staying for 4 days afterwards. My surgery went well so it could have been worse, but in hindsight I should have spent those early days bonding with baby, not making small talk with an in-law and trying to host. It also meant I was more self conscious about the various leaks than any new mother should be sparing any thought on in the first few days - you should feel completely comfortable in your own home and focussing on baby and recovery. This time we won’t be taking more than short visits for the first two weeks.

Grandparents visited in the hospital after my c section. Aunts and uncles (our siblings) over the course of the next week at home. Didn't outstay their welcome and stop too long. The family wanted to meet and welcome my child, I don't understand the current trend of not liking that. It's like the current need for the perfect wedding and for everything to look perfect before seeing family, it's too much pressure, people need to relax and not aim for such perfection, reality is absolutely fine!

Both sets of grandparents visited the same day in hospital and a friend came the evening my first was born as she was around. The first was my parents maybe 3 hours after c section.

My best friend (and her mum) came around half an hour after we arrived home from hospital with my first (they weren't local but were passing and I insisted).

But the end of the first week I'd been to see several friends, a pub lunch, church etc, absolutely fine. I threw a party at home for more distant friends to meet the baby at about 3 weeks. Similar for my second.

I had rubbish pregnancies though so having a newborn felt amazing and I wanted to show them off. I didn't even really have pain from my c section, went into a planned session feeling fresh and foggy lost much blood, so I felt fine in myself.

I did make it out to drinks with friends in the evening after about a week , and that was fine! I couldn't do that with my second because of breastfeeding, but I just took her everywhere with me.

Absolutely I would. If I'd had major surgery of any kind I can't imagine my mum not wanting to visit. Knowing her she'd be at the first block of visiting hours with grapes, a magazine and that would be absolutely fine with me. Some families must be different but if one of us is in the hospital for any reason, unless they say otherwise, we always take it in turns to visit and keep them company.

My parents came to visit just under two weeks after my c section. If they lived locally, I’d have been up for visitors after a week or so if they were just dropping by for an afternoon.

Your family aren’t staying in your home but presumably will want to spend most of the day for a few days with you. That’s pretty intense when you’re sleep deprived and recovering, so I’d probably have been comfortable with that around 10 days in.