How to address a manager who keeps sneaking up behind staff

[unbuttonedowl]

I have a manager who has a habit of creeping up very quietly behind me and other colleagues as we're working, then saying whatever he wants to say once he's very close. He seems to think it's amusing and gets a kick out of it if he startles people.

I usually have my laptop positioned so I can see him approaching, but he has startled my colleague and when she's kind of laughed it off he's said 'ah yes I've been told I can move very quietly... I'd make a good cat burglar' or something to that effect.

Today he came from another angle so I didn't see him, but I sensed him and didn't give him the satisfaction of jumping.

There are a lot of other issues with him and I wonder how long he's got in the organisation but this is one particular habit of his that genuinely creeps me out.

How do I deal with this in a way that doesn't make me look bad or gets him offside (he's spiteful.) I could go to HR, or I could bring it up with him, but I feel like it's something that is better dealt with in the moment, a blunt statement that makes him realise he's being inappropriate so he thinks twice about doing it again.

Tell him to stop being so creepy the next time he does it.

Can you send him a formal email requesting him to stop and explain it is inappropriate behaviour for the workplace and copy HR in

Seems very odd and controlling.
iDo you think.he is getting off on behaving this way.

Ask loudly in the office, "Does anybody know the correct term for a man who creeps up on women in the workplace? I'm sure there's a word for it. Anyone?"

You genuinely need to address this- calmly say to him- in a slightly baffled and offhand tone if you can manage it- I’m astonished that you are so happy to portray yourself as a creepy type of workplace manager, choosing to make yourself vulnerable to a potential complaint with this odd behaviour… focus on the behaviour not anything personal and if challenged, your response is that you are observing something someone is choosing to do, inflicting an intimidating act on women in the workplace. Say nothing more.

🤣😂🤣

Don’t worry about showing him he’s got under your skin - that’s the least of your worries. Ask to see him privately and make it perfectly clear that you find this neither funny nor clever, and that it’s triggering past trauma. And make it equally clear that if it doesn’t stop you will report to HR and raise a grievance. Sorry OP but this is the only way to deal with people like this.

Disgraceful old creep has a fetish. Yuck.

Have you always been ..how can I put this weird!

Next time he does it may email him a polite message saying that "the sneaking up behind myself and colleagues is making us uncomfortable and you would rather him know hes making you feel that way as he may be unaware of how it affecting your work environment." Bc HR into the message. Incase it backfires

Op could you and your colleague just shout what the hell x your going give me a heart attack acting like creeping Jesus say it so it’s overheard and the next time just say oh for fucks sake we’re not at school in the playground. It’s work and it’s creepy behaviour you have got me on eggshells it’s not funny or healthy. Just do this until he stops I had a manager do similar behaviour and I literally just shouted will you just fuck off you perv so the ceo could hear me and he got the message. He might be spiteful but he’s a prick. Call him out.

I think Vimto, blackcurrant, tomatoe or best of all beetroot juice would have a wonderful long lasting effect.
I'd also stand up very quickly and get right in his face and with determined menace, say If you ever do anything like that again to me or coworker I will be emailing hr and boss now feck off !

I would absolutely have a hot cup of coffee on my desk at all times... to be be accidentally thrown over poor unsuspecting idiot when he makes you jump!