New pony.. what would you do please

[Lucie390]

We recently bought a very sweet little mare 6 years old. I have many years of experience owning horses but since having children not had a horse in past 15 years. Daughter has been riding on and off since little but only a year ago got back into it properly.
An opportunity came up for livery very local to where we live (very scarce, very few vacancies ever come up) we visited a few ponies wvtb and ended up getting a little 12hh mare via a dealer (read reviews of dealer, contacted others who had bought).

Daughter is v petite 13 year old and liked that mare was easy to handle for her, also should say we loaned her for month to get to know her before purchase.

I realise it probably sounds impulsive purchase but daughter is having some issues and is looking at home schooling I thought this would be great benefit to her life.

Long story short is mare is very green, daughter is a novice. Dealer said she had had sufficient schooling, basic school work would be fine but would need some work for anything more. I thought ok great we can work with that. We rode her whilst on loan and whilst she was quite nervous, we put it down to being new, she was easy to handle and quite laid back. even took her out on roads on lead reign and I felt confident she’d be fine.

Past 4 weeks we’ve done no more than lunge, lead reign and bare back whilst we have been waiting on saddle. Pony was calm but nervous no problems. Today she’s pretty much bolted and my daughter had quite a nasty fall. It was terribly windy and I know she doesn’t the wind but I’m worried we’ve taken on more than we can handle here. We are having to lunge before riding everytime to get rid of the freshness, even then I’m finding she’s still to fizzy to ride calmly.

Im really upset, for one I feel I was mis sold her, today shook me up seeing my daughter really hurt and but also my daughter is so attached to the pony, been going to turn her out religiously and doing everything for her.

I feel so stressed that we’ve made a massive mistake here.

I asked a riding teacher to take a look this afternoon and she said she’s just very green, whilst I’m ok with working on her and spending time doing this properly, I don’t want my daughter to be the one to do this. What are my options here ?

OP said she was getting Mollychaff. Which is like 20% sugar… cutting that is a good place to start

If you bought from a dealer will they take her back or part exchange against something quieter?

Your daughter doesn't sound ready for a project and while it could be worth spending money and time getting the pony schooled by a pro you have no guarantee that the pony will ever be a confidence giving type. You also risk your daughter outgrowing the pony before they get going together or your daughter losing interest or confidence while the pony is a work in progress.

I would seriously consider selling on honestly if you can't return her and buy something much more ready to go.

Look for an older school master that will give your daughter confidence and ideally one with a bit of growing room.

Depends on the balancer, some are just vitamins and minerals but some are like rocket fuel.

Mollichaff isn't particularly low sugar either if I remember correctly.

Just to clarify I mean ask the dealer nicely if they would exchange as pony and daughter are not getting on, don't go in all guns blazing about misselling.

You haven't been missold you misjudged the situation if you are straight up about that and the dealer is decent they will probably work with you to get a happy customer.

Don't panic because of a bad day. This pony doesn't sound nasty, just anxious. Pay for as much professional help as you can afford.

It's easy enough to check. Mollichaff original is full of molasses yes, but there's a version with none.
If you can't bear to feed a cup of balancer then a vitamin and mineral supplement
I really hate it when people stop feeding horses in work to try and keep them docile.

Ps I used to be a very confident, competent rider, so I thought nothing of buying my kids a little pony. Turns out I am neither confident nor competent as a pony mum! So no judgement here at all.

Ponies are a nightmare 😂 horses are less intelligent but easier IME!

She’s only been having very small feeds of the chaff and yes sugar free. Morning is literally half a handful and evening a handful. Grass isn’t great where she is due to the mud so she’s been coming in hungry. She then has a hay net through the night.

Ok so today we lunged her in the school, tried to keep things nice and calm and although she started off calm she again bolted when trotting. I had no intention of cantering just nice controlled walk to trot transitions and keeping things quiet and calm. Each time she’d bolt into fast canter, I tried to let her burn it off but same again.

I want to be realistic, this isn’t what we signed up for. She was so calm when we rode her at the dealers that I took her out on lead reign in traffic !! Im horrified as anything can spook her. A dog ran up to us off lead and she was fine yet something in the distance we can’t hear and she’s spooked again.

I don’t think I can risk that.

If she’s out in the field all day with no grass and just getting one Haynet at night that’s a huge ulcer risk and would potentially explain why her behaviour has deteriorated

She does have grass just with this weather being so wet grass isn’t as great. She does have grass but I give her extra hay at night as she’s hungry.

How much hay is she getting? Is it enough to keep her going through the night? She shouldn’t be without food for hours and hours. Shell get ulcers.

I do think the issue is you’ve bought a nervous pony for a nervous novice and it’s been the disaster it was always going to be, but you need to keep an eye on her welfare in the mean time.

Id in your shoes return her to the dealer

Dealer won’t have ever back.

She has x2 big haynets a night, there’s hay left over by morning when I turn her out at 7am.

She does have plenty of grass but less than she had a month ago before the weather that’s all I meant.

I agree she probably needs more hay. Have I missed it but when you say recently, how recently did you buy her? Ours had been here over a month and only sat on him 3 times so far. 1st time after 3.5 weeks and time to de compress in between and lots of in hand walks and long reining just to get used to new surroundings. They really do need a lot of time especially when slightly nervy babies.

Who did you buy them from?! Virtually every reputable dealer would take a horse back…

It doesn't sound like your daughter is ready for her own pony. Sell this one and go back to the riding school.

Riding a green pony with a novice rider in very strong wind was a really silly thing to do.

It depends, mine came with a contract saying I could return if not as described or had a health issue that showed its self within a certain time frame. I couldn't send him back because he was green as that was made very clear from the outset

I had riding lessons from the age of 6 but was a terribly nervous rider.

Started working at a local yard on a YTS at 16 with a special interest in starting youngsters. Went through a fearless phase during which the more the horse pranced and pratted about the better.

Along came a mortgage and some self preservation and I reverted to very wary of anything that might put me at risk.

Life stages 😁

Will not take her back and she’s well known.

We’ve had her 6 weeks

Have you got a saddle now? Could you borrow a plod yourself and lead the pony with your daughter onboard? Agree more lessons but your daughter will now lack confidence when opportunity to hack surfaces. Do you have a local pony club? You might find someone within pc looking to move from schoolmaster type to something more lively who would swap?

Also recommend getting teeth and back checked if you didn't have the pony vetted.

Yes I’ve bought everything as she came with nothing. I’m livid. The dealer won’t have her back and saying I shouldn’t have given her time to de compress should have ridden her right away so fault lies with me.

You need to ask your instructor if she knows anyone small and competent enough to ride her for a bit , or send her away for work .

Tbh I wouldn't be livid. Dealers don't give decompress time - they dont have the time to do that. A private home is totally different and that time will be valuable. Hard when you have an excited dc though. I've got 2 who are sharing our pony (9 and just turned 13) so I understand but I'm teaching the importance of time and ground work. They are learning to long rein, to teach moving hind quarters and to back up - no lunging although we'll move on to that with the 2 lines at some point

Not over feeding has nothing to do with keeping them docile, and everything to do with health and avoiding over feeding. The vast majority obtain everything they need calorie and nutrient wise from forage alone, and the amount of energy used by the average leisure horse in light work is less if anything than the energy they’d use for foraging over a natural, large area. Unless you’re starving a horse to the point of fatigue, you aren’t keeping it docile by not over feeding, you’re just avoiding the problems that go with it.
I’m as guilty as anyone for giving my all my horses a bucket feed they don’t need, but there’s a big difference between a human size handful of chaff and thinking a pony needs a balancer just ‘because’.

@Lucie390 is your dd in pony club? I wondered if it’s possible to maybe find a dc that might be interested in a part time riding swop. A child that maybe still wants their reliable pony but also needs a challenge could be the ideal temporary solution.