I think I'm putting down my difficult horse

[whattodowheretogo]

I've posted about my horse on here before but I'd just like some last minute opinions.

I bought him a year ago from a TB breeder and trainer as she felt that she was too old for a horse like him and she couldn't sit his spooks.

No ground manners, didn't know where to put his feet, didn't respond to pressure.

I wanted a project and he was one in every sense of the word. I fell in love with him as soon as I saw him.

When I tried him out he was good, but at the end, he took off with me across the field and didn't stop until he physically couldn't go any further. I wasn't concerned about that, I just figured he was green and overwhelmed and these things would come with time.

When we got him home he needed a chifney to be taken anywhere or he would just set his neck and try to canter off (my ex was looking after him for a lot of the time - he's a racehorse trainer and rehab yard owner so he knows what he's doing!) and even he would struggle with him.

Through the months his ground manners improved but to this day he can suddenly try to drag you somewhere and canter off.

His biggest issues are ridden. I've had many rides on him when he's simply decided to take off and nothing can stop him until he's done himself in. One lesson I had we were cantering for so long with him screeching round the corners and bucking that I was getting lightheaded. My trainer couldn't do anything but stand and watch.

He will do things like take off, then screech to a halt in front of the fence, then shoot off again.

I've taken everything right back to basics, over the winter I worked solely on the ground with him, teaching him the saddle and bridle is a positive thing, we learnt to stand stock still at the mountain block, yield to pressure etc.

But he is so unpredictable - he'll do a nasty spook at "nothing", just completely drop his shoulder.

I've spent months just walking and trotting in the school to make it a nice calm experience for him. I've honestly tried everything.

He's just messed up his only saving grace - to hack he is brilliant and super calm. But this weekend he took one look at something on the floor, bolted for home and ran into the main road. I came off, got concussion and fractured my foot.

I've been riding for 17 years, I'll ride literally anything. I ride friend's difficult horses for them if they've come off and had accidents and have a great time. But there's just something about this horse that I just think.. what is it going to take?

I'm so thankful that this wasn't a worse injury for either me or him.

I'm pretty certain that I'm going to put him down. It's something I've discussed with my vet before after he remarked what a difficult git he was.

I feel like it would be unfair on him to pass him on, I'd worry about how he'd be treated given all his quirks, whether he'd be passed on again etc but also I'd worry that he may seriously injure himself or someone else.

Thoughts/suggestions?

Allthepretty, did you miss the section where I said this horse has done one over on multiple professionals as well?

Alltheprettyseahorses your comment re not being allowed any more animals is ridiculous. I do hope you never take on any animal that develops problems outside of your control. You would have to take a nice, long look in the mirror if you did, it might not be pretty

@voci

Why's it unfair to suggest you could rehome it? Sounds like you've got plenty of space and experience. Ideal solution if you don't think it should be pts.

PTS seems to me to be 100% the responsible thing to do Op. You have obviously devoted a lot of time, effort and money into trying to sort this horse out, but some horses cannot be sorted.

How many hours exercise would he have in a week?

@Alltheprettyseahorses, your comment is at best unkind and at worst downright vicious.

There is an incredible difference between a dog that an idiot owner has raised to bite and a horse in this situation who is already on its second chance.

As much as we'd like to change it, sometimes animals just can't be fixed and the kindest thing to do is pts in their own surroundings.

whattodowheretogo Has it? But it is your horse and you have been the one working with it. The buck stops with you.

mustbemad17 I wouldn't take on an animal that I am unable to cope with in the first place. The first responsibility a potential owner of any animal must do is be honest with themselves about their abilities. The horse has got worse with OP.

I know a charity that takes difficult horses, but they couldn’t cope with this one.

The story of the house bolting and ending up in a car roof with a brain damaged driver is horrific - and surely that is the level of risk we are dealing with here?

If you have run out of things to try to make him safe then I don’t think you have any choice OP

He doesn’t sound as if he has the necessary skills to be a companion horse - you have to still be safe around humans.

My horse was dangerous, he had arthritis in his neck he had treatment at one of the hospitals and is now a perfect horse doing Ad Medium dressage. if you want one last try see if you can get a referral. If not pts, he sounds too dangerous to pass on - there are worse fates for horses than being dead ....

Incidentally my son was once kicked in the head (luckily while wearing a hat) by a spooky tiny pony. Pony was unshod. He flew through the air (son) and landed in a crumpled heap about 8 foot away.

An ex racehorse TB can do some serious damage.

I love horses but have very little experience.
Op I really feel for you, it's obvious (to those who have bothered to read the thread) that you have worked very hard with him.

QuestionableMouse This was a difficult horse to start with but the OP thought she had the ability to deal with it. Instead, its behaviour has deteriorated, which very, very strongly suggest the OP was overconfident. It has been horrendously let down. Would it have been okay with someone else? Who knows. Too late now. It clearly does need to be put down. The OP must take responsibility.

This thread is really sad, this is one of the few places I post now on this forum as always been a sort of safe space, without the drama of aibu.

This is a really sad situation for the op, she is obviously experienced and has tried everything, it’s not some kind of snap decision .
Horses that are dangerous and given away as companions will without a doubt end up going through a succession of dodgy dealers and causing no end of heartbreak to new owners and trauma to themselves.
Pts is the responsible decision, not some kind of cop out.
I can’t think of any other area of the forum where someone could jump on a thread, happily proclaim “ I know b all about this topic but ...” and feel themselves an instant expert .

I'm an

@Alltheprettyseahorses or its a sign that the horse has a condition that's getting worse over time or a million other things.

I'm a huge horse lover but I'm realistic too.

I read six pages of this as I have a horse back ground and was interested in the problem horse. Peng has been called a cunt, a wanker and dim to name a few. You’re all nasty as fuck.

Alltheprettyseahorses OP has had other PROFESSIONALS trying to help with this horse. This isn't a novice thinking she can do everything. Searching out professional help is absolutely the correct method to deal with ANY troublesome issue in an animal...there is only so much a person can do. Without the right space to retire the horse to - safely - then what option is left exactly?

Astounded at all the people suggesting he's passed on in one way or another.

There are fates worse than death. I think it sounds like the responsible decision to make 😘

Oops, posting probs! I'm an equine vet nurse and have been for twenty five years, last fifteen at a university site. There are some you cannot sort, sadly. Miss human to look for causes and its 'nice' to find a reason. But, you've done pretty much everything we'd recommend. It must be a miserable existence for him too as its not what horses are like, being that strung out and reactive all the time. Those that say let him live out his life in a field....many TB's don't do well living out all the time and even if it works when younger, when they are older in their teens, they suffer and need stabling....he will go insane at that point! A life in solitary confinement? Really?
And from the sounds of it, he isn't great to handle on the ground, horses living as companions need handling. This isn't a small animal that can be handled easily.

Op, it is so unusual for a horse to be like your boy, I've had three stallions and none have been reactive like your boy. Quirky, yes. But quirks that aren't going to be lethal.

Do not pass him on, he will be passed from pillar to post and may just kill someone on the way. An old friend died a few years ago with a horse very similar....her husband not being horsey, sold the horse on to a dealer. We don't know what happened to him, just hope he finally net someone with the courage and compassion to stop it.
You know it's the right thing for him, don't you. Thinking of you xx

I have no experience but from the information you have given I can see that you have given your all.
I cannot see where you have a choice. It looks like you have been very lucky that no one has been seriously hurt before.
I really do feel for you.

OP, you are doing absolutely the right thing.
I run a DIY/Full/retirement yard and I would absolutely not have a horse like yours on it, due to its unpredictable nature and the chance of it injuring other horses, owners or itself.

Its highly unlikely that a blood bank or charity would be able to accommodate a horse that is as difficult to handle on the ground as you describe.

Money calling us "nasty as fuck" doesn't really make you much better, does it?

OP please ignore the insanely nasty posters ignoring the fact you tried to help this horse and did all the things that professionals here would've suggested. There is every chance this horse would've caused more damage or worsened even more with any other owner.

You are making the right decision OP from the sounds of things and I would say the same to anyone with a large animal who despite professional intervention has gone on to threaten the safety of itself and others.

Something is seriously troubling him and if you haven't got to the bottom of that after a year and he is worse then you are done. To morally pass him on would only be possible if you could be certain of the outcome and you can't.

This isn't a Robert Redford movie it is an animal suffering and trapped by something that makes him a lethal danger.

From someone who knows nothing, it sounds as if having him PTS is much more responsible than passing him on. Having read your posts and those of others with experience, I really think it is the best option.

You will do it with a heavy heart, but a clear conscience.