I need advice with behaviour management or I think I'm going to fail my NQT

[pinkrocker]

I started school this year with the intention of being firm but fair. I've tried really, really hard but it appears that although my class really like me and we have a great relationship, the respect is not there, and they see me as a friend.
I have a lot of shouting out, and low level silliness.
How can I improve from the start of next term?
My class behave impeccably (I've seen it!) with every other teacher but me, so I MUST improve or I'll be on a support plan. My HT is supportive though!
My HT has arranged for me to observe every other teacher in school so far as she wants to help me pass my NQT and I've asked to go and observe other teachers in different schools if possible and hopefully that will happen too.
I need to start afresh. But I'm not sure how to restart my behaviour management when my class know me well already?
Thanks for reading.

First - I've used the minutes on the board thing in the past with some groups and it doesn't really end up as collective punishment because once the bell goes and they're sat in silence you can lavish praise upon the ones who behaved and give them a housepoint and say thank you for working hard despite some people trying to ruin it and I'm sorry you've had some of your lesson wasted and let them go.

The borderline ones are then next - right so you were a bit silly but you did settle down and get on in the end so will I see that from the start next time? Off you go.

It's only the ones who've really misbehaved who end up really being punished.

More importantly though OP this is such a tough year - it would be anyway as an NQT but you've also had an interrupted training year, a pandemic, kids who've been out of routines for months etc. Experienced stalwart teachers are struggling so of course you are knackered and feeling overwhelmed - most of us are despite experience under out belts.

I'm one of those freaky people who struggles in normal times to have the same energy levels as others but is good in a crisis but I have to do a lot of moaning and have definitely had the odd, oh my god this is not sustainable realisation when working on all of my days off or racing from one zone to the next without a toilet break.

All I can promise you is that if you get through this year you will likely never have such a difficult year again and you will have developed resilience and confidence that will see you through lesser tough years in future.

You are doing great - you've turned things around on your observation and definitely have the grit to get through this. Be kind to yourself please.

On the former part of my post about adding minutes I just want to add that it actually provides an opportunity to acknowledge and praise those who have done well and show them that you do notice and you do appreciate their efforts and you do genuinely care that some people are fucking up their education. The badly behaved ones are forced to witness what praise looks like, what behaviour is actually sought and rewarded.

Banging books on tables is definitely not me though. I would fully expect the kids to think I was a bullying dickhead who had power issues if I did that and my goal is mutual respect not grudging compliance tinged with disgust.

Honeybadger- your way of doing minutes on the board sounds quite different to the described “game” where just one child, the most recent to do something “annoying”, serves all of the minutes on the board and everyone else, including the others who earned minutes on the board, are allowed to go. I’ve seen staff do your version of minutes on the board for unruly classes where its genuinely impossible to tell who is causing the problem. I’ve definitely done the sort of targeted dismissal you talk about where you let those who were wonderful leave first and then gradually dismiss the rest until you’re left with those you want to talk to about their poor behaviour. I’ve never seen bad behaviour rack up minutes on the board to be served only by the last person to misbehave. Fairness matters. That “game” is fundamentally unfair.

Very unfair and kind of encouraging bullying. I can imagine kids trying to provoke someone to get in trouble so they end up with the minutes.

OP you are doing the best thing by seeing out your training to the end to get qualified. You will at least then have a qualification and things might get better. I'm a deputy head and it's hard even for us experienced teachers and I'm spending a lot of time working with children pastorally and their families. Covid certainly has really thrown the kids. You could look at other jobs allied to teaching, maybe be a TA or move to other areas of learning support etc. Keep on with what you are doing; there is nothing at all wrong with being strict. There are lots of posts about trying to reason with pupils etc and praise the good ones. Your job is to get the classroom under your control and get the lesson taught....not pander to naughty teenagers. You can do this. Physically command the room, walk round, stand behind the naughty ones while you are teaching....I used to use a wireless mouse/keyboard and go snd sit next to them....it's your classroom and you must find a way to command it. Good luck

Thank you everyone.
Some of the sillier ones in my Y6 class now will behave for me, but act up for other teachers which is boiling my head! Now I have to use my PPA to go in and stare at them (they do calm right down very quickly)
Another class were absolutely dreadful, practical class with two TAs and me, but 6 were pratting about and interrupting everyone else, because the nature of the subject (textiles in this instance) each child needs 1-1 attention with their work, turning my back on them for literally one second led to uproar. Both TAs working with all children.
I used the BM, I used the sanctions, I did not shout but gave them options (behave and settle, or leave the room with TA, calm down and return in 10 mins) but on return, just chaos. TA told the HT. So that went down well. Hate this job, passionately.