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Original poster

Placing hands on a student

91 replies

Piggywaspushed · 25/06/2019 17:25

This is more of a WWYD and I may have to get this thread taken down if it becomes at all outing but I am in a moral maze.

It is not OK to place your hand over a child's mouth-even in jest- and tell them to be quiet, is it? This is secondary and in a corridor before I get asked for context. Lots of students around. The child did not appear upset and was not angry either. In fact, the desired effect of shushing was achieved...

Would you report this, regardless of the jest involved and/or who the staff member was?

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DaisiesAreOurSilver · 25/06/2019 19:31

The child wasn't bothered. That's the main thing. Sounds to me like a jokey gesture between a teacher and a pupil he knew well.

I could imagine doing this with particular kids I've taught and them taking it in good part. A little informality can be a good thing.

Let it go.

Usuallytootiredbuthappyanyway · 25/06/2019 19:35

I think it is a weird thing for a teacher to have done, I have never seen that type of physical contact, a hand over the mouth is quite intimate. I wouldn't want someone else's hand on MY mouth that I am not in a relationship with! As for reporting it, that's a difficult one. Do you have someone you can trust, e.g. a line manager who you can tell? Explain that it made you feel uncomfortable and are not sure if it's appropriate?

Original poster
Piggywaspushed · 25/06/2019 19:39

The teacher doesn't know the pupil well. I doubt he knows him at all!

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Original poster
Piggywaspushed · 25/06/2019 19:41

A little informality!!? He placed his hand entirely over a child's mouth and said shush into his face...

I have been teaching 25 years and have never seen a secondary teacher do anything like this, I'll be honest.

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Original poster
Piggywaspushed · 25/06/2019 19:41

usually , yes, I think I know someone outside the inner circle who I can talk it over with.

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Original poster
Piggywaspushed · 25/06/2019 19:43

Can I repeat I don't know if the child was bothered. He wasn't angry (he's a little lad) but he did look a bit shocked. Any child would be if a member of staff out their hand over their mouth, I reckon... it's not exactly an everyday occurrence....

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LolaSmiles · 25/06/2019 19:47

I dont think it's appropriate.

A jokey hush finger in front of the face, said with a smile would be reasonable (assuming a good relationship between staff and pupil).
Even a hovering hand, loud shh followed by a smile, light hearted redirect etc would be ok.

Hand making contact over the mouth from a wound up member of staff isn't ok to me. Not only does it seem unprofessional, it's also a bit weird.
I wouldn't pass any judgement and speculate whether the child was ok or not, but would submit a factual recording of what I saw.

Saucery · 25/06/2019 19:49

I wouldn’t do that to my own child, so I certainly wouldn’t do it to a pupil. I can’t imagine anyone I work with ever thinking that was acceptable and we allow a certain amount of contact to get attention etc, so not a No Touch school.
There are only 2 physical responses to that - be silent (and probably shocked into it) or push the person doing it away. What would the teacher have done if it had been the latter? I’d be concerned about that.

AndMyBirdCanSing · 25/06/2019 19:49

The teacher doesn't know the pupil well. I doubt he knows him at all! In that case it's not acceptable - for all the teacher knows the child could have autism or sensory difficulties and this could have been very upsetting for them.

QueenofCBA · 25/06/2019 19:52

I think you need to report this, as awkward as it might be! It is definitely not ok to put a hand over a child’s mouth to shush them!

I am quite touchy and often hold myself back when I want to touch somebody’s shoulder or, even worse, ruffle a lovely Year 7s hair Blush - but that is always because it would be too friendly! I would never touch a child in a “confrontational” way.

Original poster
Piggywaspushed · 25/06/2019 19:53

I agree and but I actually think it's wrong regardless of the child. If I had someone put their hand over my mouth I don't know what I would do!!

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TitianaTitsling · 25/06/2019 19:54

Do you have a poor relationship with the teacher in question? If you think it was so awful follow your safeguarding training and report,am just a bit bemused that you now wish you hadn't said 'in jest' as you've not evoked the response you thought you'd get.

Original poster
Piggywaspushed · 25/06/2019 19:54

You make a good point saucer. I think the teacher did this because the child was physically small and not a big aggressive lad.

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Original poster
Piggywaspushed · 25/06/2019 19:58

I wish I hadn't said in hest because people are misinterpreting that as if it was two sided banter, which it wasn't. I am wary of the teacher's rank is all.

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Original poster
Piggywaspushed · 25/06/2019 19:58

jest!

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HappyHammy · 25/06/2019 20:01

Did you say anything to the teacher at the time or speak to the student to ask if they were o k.

Bookworm4 · 25/06/2019 20:03

I think whilst it’s not ideal you are reading way too much into this; it could escalate into aggressive behaviour? He done it because it was a small child?
Are you determined to portray this teacher as a violent bully/predator?
Seriously, calm down

Original poster
Piggywaspushed · 25/06/2019 20:04

No happy as I didn't want to put thoughts into the student's head and there was a large number of students there and I had class to get to. I wouldn't have dared speak to the member of staff. I think he may have played up the jocular aspect when he saw me to be honest.

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BloodyhellMartha · 25/06/2019 20:05

I'm not sure what you want. Most posters have said they wouldn't report and you keep repeatedly posting updates to why you think you should, how inappropriate you think it, how shocked the child was, etc.

You thought everyone would agree with you and they didn't. You'll have to make your own professional judgement on this - but perhaps be aware that it might not go the way you think it will judging by this post.

Original poster
Piggywaspushed · 25/06/2019 20:06

Perfectly calm thanks bookworm. The teacher us small, so I meant he would not have done this to someone larger than himself.

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DaisiesAreOurSilver · 25/06/2019 20:07

You really don't like the other teacher do you, OP?

If you do report home be sure it isn't in spite because that's how it sounds.

DaisiesAreOurSilver · 25/06/2019 20:07

*report him

Original poster
Piggywaspushed · 25/06/2019 20:09

I think my school.might view things differently . Guess I'll find out.
I wonder if I had posted this on education as a patent what would have happened . People would be horrified, I reckon.

You're right: I did expect people to confirm it's not on. It's more my concern for myself about whistle blowing.

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HappyHammy · 25/06/2019 20:10

How old was the student, was he just being annoying or offensive and rude. To be honest I would have said something at the time if I felt it was inappropriate and asked the boy if he was ok. What is your relationship like with this colleague.

Catapultaway · 25/06/2019 20:11

Why wouldn't you have dared speak to him? You are a teacher with 25 years experience.