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The staffroom

Whether you're a permanent teacher, supply teacher or student teacher, you'll find others in the same situation on our Staffroom forum.

Original poster

Advised to take time off

31 replies

cpjoli · 18/06/2018 21:47

But I can't face phoning in sick. I know I'm pretty mentally unwell at the moment and while seeing a professional about it today she suggested going to see my gp about time off.
I had half a day off last week due to a stressful event at home and 2 days off before half term for a bug. I feel so guilty and they're going to be really pissed off but I can't help think I do need some space. I don't know what to do.

OP posts:
WowLookAtYou · 18/06/2018 21:52

Well, yes, they might be pissed off. But that's kind of tough for them, really, isn't it? Perhaps they should have taken staff welfare more seriously to help prevent things reaching this point for you.
And anyway, it's part of the job for Senior Leaders to manage these staffing issues.
Put yourself first. No one else will.

ohreallyohreallyoh · 18/06/2018 21:54

Take the time off. The sooner you do it, the better. Call in sick tomorrow and make an appointment to see your GP. You will not be an effective teacher with this hanging over you and it’s a slippery slope. If you’re secondary, there’s lots of gained time floating around at the moment so don’t feel so bad. Look after you because no one else will.

frustratedashell · 18/06/2018 21:55

I agree with wow. Your health is the most important thing. Take the time off and get well

greendale17 · 18/06/2018 21:58

Just take it off as a long period of sick instead of half a day here, a few days there.

anotherangel2 · 18/06/2018 22:02

I have had time off with stress recently and yes ringing up is truest awful.

Honestly once you have done it will feel much better. Ring tomorrow and say you will be off for the rest of the week with stress/anxiety or whatever it is. Then get your GP to sign you off.

You know on the plane when they tell you to put your oxygen mask on first this is the teaching version of this. A good teacher looks after their own health, takes time off when needed so you can get to back to good health as soon as possible You can’t be a good teacher when you are ill.

No one is irreplaceable. Our head was off for over 6 months and everything ticked along (it was better without him but that is another story). Schools have insurance to cover the cost of supply. If you are then you can’t work.

I don’t know of another profession that has such guilt for being off. DH and I bumped into a colleague the other day who was hip to ankle in plaster cast. DH said he knew straight away that she was as a teacher because she looked guilty to be out the house when it was clear she was too ill to actually be in work.

Original poster
cpjoli · 19/06/2018 19:14

I stupidly went in today. It's been horrible. I can't put on a happy face Sad not when I feel like this. I feel terrible.

OP posts:
Bombardier25966 · 19/06/2018 19:17

Then you know what you need to do tomorrow morning. You're only making yourself more ill by trying to continue.

CuckooCuckooClock · 19/06/2018 20:15

Do it. Just call the absence line, state you are ill and that you'll call again when you're fit to return.
Like a pp said, if schools don't want to have to deal with sickness then they need to take staff welfare more seriously.
2 weeks before last half term I called in sick. I took 2 weeks off then went back after half term, so 3 weeks total. I feel a million times better now. I'm just more detached from work emotionally so can switch off form all the shit. I'd got it all out of perspective and couldn't calm down. Now it's so much easier.
Look after yourself.

Original poster
cpjoli · 20/06/2018 08:49

I did it. Currently at doctors...hopefully will get some help. Thanks

OP posts:
frustratedashell · 20/06/2018 09:19

Well done OP. Hope you get the help you need

noblegiraffe · 20/06/2018 11:30

Hope the doctors have signed you off, OP.

@cuckoocuckooclock glad to hear you are feeling better about things!

Original poster
cpjoli · 20/06/2018 11:40

Yes I'm signed off for 2 weeks. Have the chmt calling later. I feel so relieved.

OP posts:
frustratedashell · 20/06/2018 12:57

Great news OP

Original poster
cpjoli · 21/06/2018 20:20

Handed in my sick note today to a very icy reception. Just demanded my reports. I left in tears. Now dreading going back in 2 weeks already. My teacher friend I had at school isn't replying to my messages and she's usually quick to reply. Feeling so down about it all.

OP posts:
noblegiraffe · 21/06/2018 20:58

Put an out of office reply on your email and stop thinking about it. You need a break from school, so put a ‘somebody else’s problem field’ around it and watch a box set or something. Tomorrow try to get out in the fresh air and clear your head.

frustratedashell · 22/06/2018 13:33

Hope you're feeling a bit better today OP.
That's awful how they've treated you, I'm sure you don't enjoy feeling like that!
Perhaps when you feel better give some thought to changing jobs? No job is worth suffering mental health problems for. I've had to do it. I found out how much they valued me, not very much! Put your self first

Rockandrollwithit · 22/06/2018 20:10

@cpjoli

I'm a member of SLT. And life will go on in school without you, please stop feeling guilty. It's not going to help your recovery at all.

I had a teacher off last year during report writing time. I had to step up and write her reports for her. A bit annoying and time consuming for me, yes - but that's what I'm paid for. Your SLT are also paid to sort out eventualities such as this, as well as arrange cover. It's part of the job.

If I were you I would stop texting people from work and try to have a proper break for the two weeks you are signed off for. Hope you feel stronger soon Flowers.

BrutusMcDogface · 22/06/2018 20:14

Been there, done that, op, as have many of my teaching friends and colleagues.

You are ill. Take the time to rest and recover. I know it's an old cliche but if you'd had a heart attack or something you wouldn't feel bad for having time off! Look after yourself. Erase work from your mind as best you can. Sending lots of love and Flowers

Original poster
cpjoli · 22/06/2018 20:18

Thanks for the replies. I've had a few messages from work but I'm just deleting them. Mainly just acquaintances. I don't want conversations about why I'm off with other staff.
I did 75% of my reports and I'll get the rest done by Monday. Then I've got a clear conscience.
I'm still very tearful and emotional but a bit more relaxed than I was.

OP posts:
Rockandrollwithit · 22/06/2018 20:26

Please don't write those reports. You have been signed off as your GP believes you are not fit for work. In my mind, that includes writing reports, which can actually be pretty stressful at the best of times. I bet you feel like they are hanging over you at the moment. Your school may not like you not doing them but they cannot argue with you being signed off.

When you are well OP I really would consider looking for another position. I would never expect someone signed off for MH reasons to write reports, and neither would any of the other members of SLT I work with. If someone had a broken leg and volunteered to write them at home surrounded by cushions, that's fine, but not MH issues. You need to find somewhere that values staff more than this.

frustratedashell · 23/06/2018 10:20

Definitely don't write the reports. You are off SICK! they will cope. Please just rest and think of yourself and your health.

frustratedashell · 26/06/2018 12:57

How are you feeling OP?

NT53NJT · 26/06/2018 13:02

Well that's tough for them. I don't get why employers act so obviously Cold towards sick notes for mental health.

Just because they can't physically see the illness they become off with you.

Would they demand reports off you if you were off Ill and in a coma? No.

Original poster
cpjoli · 04/07/2018 19:15

I was feeling better until I went back to work today to be told I will be having a meeting with HR, which sounds like a capability meeting. I know they are looking at my absences and they will probably go for dismissal on health grounds as I don't fit in their school. I never have and never will. I feel absolutely sick about the whole thing and I just don't know what to do. I want to run away from it all.

I am so sick of my mental health affecting my entire life. I had got rid of the suicidal thoughts for a bit, but they are back and stronger as I just feel useless. I don't even have anyone to talk to as I cant trust anyone. My DH basically said told you so.

OP posts:
frustratedashell · 04/07/2018 20:49

So sorry to hear that OP. esp about your unsupportive DH.

Have you tried counselling? It helped me when I was very depressed. Thinking of you OP