Help - one week to decide

[punygod]

Basically, I hate my job.

I teach English in a small rural secondary school - which sounds idyllic.

It's not.

Behaviour is appalling, SLT are useless, the school is just out of SM and every day there are new initiatives, scrutinies, etc etc. It's impossible to keep up.

I've been observed to death and earlier this year my GP signed me off for three weeks for work-related stress, prescribing sertraline to get me through to the end of the year. He advised that I change my career.

There's a misogynistic 'lad' culture in the staff room - we're talking scat porn being passed around on phones, and last week a cover supervisor exposed his bare arse in the staff room. I came home and cried all night.

I know this job is unsustainable, but the hard facts are I'm not qualified for anything else, my dp is currently looking for work and as a result of some poor decision making, my stbxh gives me no money for our kids (we do 50/50) even though dp and I do the lion's share of buying their things, treats etc.

I have kept our large ex-marital home on because I want my children to have some stability and because house prices mean I would be selling it very cheaply - and it's my main asset.

I have no mortgage and I do have a small income from investments, so I might be able to make ends meet - but the thought of losing the main household income really scares me.

I've no idea what to do. I feel trapped.

Does anyone have any advice?

[FidelineandFumblin]

I'm on The Flow Chart of Shame

Theirs or your own internal one? Bugger it. Seriously. They'd have better presenteeism and staff retention if they knew how to run a school.

[FidelineandFumblin]

I know it seems like I'm playing the 'yes, but' game, but I really have lost a lot of financial security in recent years. I'm worried I'll just replace one lot of stress with another.

Fair enough, but a) You do have the considerable advatage of being mortgage free, so the roof over your head is safe. b) The earlier point about the quality of your decisions under the current stress still stands c) Sustained stress can trigger a range of debilitating physical illnesses and you'll be in a much worse position if that happens to you.

[punygod]

You're speaking a lot of sense.

I wasn't sure whether I was being a drama queen.

It does look bad written down, though, doesn't it?

[FidelineandFumblin]

It does look bad written down, though, doesn't it?

It really does.

I'm quite concerned on your behalf about the prospect of an OFSTED. Straws and Camels etc.

[NearTheWindymill]

I had to look up "scat porn". At first I thought you were being a bit precious but that is atrocious. If staff are dropping their trousers in a shared staffroom, that is gross misconduct. What is the SLTs response? Can you get a job in a better school?

[JonSnowKnowsNothing]

The ethos in your work place sounds disgusting. You should leave and raise hell. Demand an exit interview. Are you an academy? Would the sponsors be interested to know what's going on in school? Nobody should work somewhere like this. Grrrr.
Sorry - this really hits a nerve as a friend has moved to a school that sounds quite similar to yours (minus the scat porn!)
You say you've lost the love, but have you really? Are there any better schools nearby who have vacancies?

[Mitzi50]

Punygod - you could be me. Exactly the same feelings about work - although i'm being bullied out, very similar back story but I'm a single parent of teenagers. I'll keep reading the posts with interest. I'm fairly certain deadline is 31st May which would give a bit more time.

[punygod]

I'm seriously not precious. I'm a very broad minded person indeed - but in the right place and at the right time.

It just really upset me to see a bare arse in a school staffroom.

I had pride in my job, and I defend state education all the time - then stuff like that happens and I fear for the future, I really do.

I promise, I'm the least precious person on the planet.

[punygod]

In fact, my lack of preciousness stops me from blowing the whistle. For a while I joined in with staffroom banter, until it took a revolting turn. ( I never condoned porn use in school I must stress).

My 'laugh along' attitude has bitten me on the arse, pardon the pun.

[FidelineandFumblin]

Is FE work or HE study skills/EFL a viable prospect for you?

[PotteringAlong]

Right, £1500 is a lot for outgoings if you've got no mortgage.

1. What can you do without? Sky TV? Mobile? Gym? Where can you cut that down?
   

1. Can you cut down food bills?
   

1. Do you have 2 cars that you could do without, ie and manage just one? Can you return the lease car and buy a £500 banger?
   

1. What can you sell that would raise some temporary cash?

[punygod]

I'm a bit out of the loop with education-related jobs, as I returned to teaching after 13 years out, so I've been busy relearning the ropes.

I was so proud to have got back into the profession.

Huh.

[ReeseWithoutHerSpoon]

Sorry, was scrubbing a day's worth of grime off Dd. I plan to do some supply.

[FidelineandFumblin]

My 'laugh along' attitude has bitten me on the arse, pardon the pun.

When a work environment is that far gone and the inappropriateness is that severe, there's not much hope of a quick improvement anyway, regardless of grievance or union options.

[Phineyj]

You don't need any resources for tutoring - you can get everything you need online or from the library. You probably have quite a lot of relevant books already?

[punygod]

I've looked into returning the car - the only way I can do it without having to pay 20k is to sell the lease (nobody would buy it) or do a forced repossession, which would ruin my credit rating - which, facing facts, I might bloody need.

[FidelineandFumblin]

I was so proud to have got back into the profession.

It's all teaching. People to make those kind of moves. I also have two friends who have moved from teaching to museum education dept roles. There are options.

[punygod]

You know what - I think I'm going to do it.

Nothing can be as bad as this, can it?

[PotteringAlong]

Does it need to be an education related job? Why not do exam marking and work in a supermarket / mcdonalds / anywhere to pay the bills whilst you decide?

[punygod]

Tbh, if I never set foot in a school again, I'll be quite happy.

They're not the same places they were 15 years ago.

[FidelineandFumblin]

Nothing can be as bad as this, can it?

Personally I would rather spend a year or two operating a shop till and making drastic economies than put up with what you describe.

[Fluffycloudland77]

Can you do a voluntary termination on the car?.

[punygod]

Yes, I can but it would knacker my credit rating, apparently.

Yes, a year's breathing space...

[Lottiedoubtie]

Any independent schools nearby?

Could be a source of income, they might not have any teaching jobs going straight away, but cover supervision, LSA, TA, or even as a source of tutoring work?

Porn in the staff room is totally inappropriate (and a red flag for child protection problems developing as I as told in my last safeguarding INSET). Whatever you do I'd be reporting that to OfSTED and your Union.