Strangest bits in Spare…

[Motorcycleemptyness]

i haven’t quite finished it yet but I wanted to read a thread about some of the weirder bits of Spare, and I haven’t seen a thread where people were discussing those without the ‘H&M’ vs the rest of the RF debate. There are definitely some parts which have made me really question why they were included, and I was wondering if anyone else had any similar thoughts.

The inclusion of the imagery of the poppy fields, and how heroin funds the Taliban. Fair enough. We all know that. The rest of the book is one long ode to posh people taking drugs. Does Prince Harry think the cocaine he takes is gently knitted by fairies and delivered to him by unicorns? Do the drugs he takes not contribute to war and terrorism and misery across the rest of the world (and indeed misery and crime in the UK, where he is 5th in line to be monarch!) I found this quite a strange passage and I was wondering if anyone else had any thoughts, or am I just over thinking it?

Elizabeth Arden cream. ‘Mummy’s lips’. ‘Todger’. Why? But really, why? Why was this included? Why did anyone think it or commit it to paper, and then publish it? Why did I read it? Why am I typing it here? ARGH.

What he actually thinks the relationship between the royal family and the press should actually be. Only reporting true things? Someone had a photo of him taking cocaine. Dressed as a nazi. Calling his colleague a ‘P*ki’. He wasn’t happy, but it was all true. Should journalists not be allowed to report true things? Or should they only be reporting things he wants them to report? Does Andrew get to choose that too? What about everyone else?

What the actual royal family should look like. This was mind bending. He seems to be perfectly happy with the idea of the monarchy, an institution which is predicated on the idea that they’re inherently superior to the rest of us, and that’s their birth right, but seems to massively struggle to apply that to himself and William. If a monarchy is the best system, why shouldn’t the heir be treated differently to the spare? (I don’t believe it is the best system and wish we could abolish them all but I don’t understand how one can believe one but not the other!).

Anyone else have any interesting thoughts?

@MonsoonMadness many of his family fought in wars.
Prince philip saw active service and by all accounts was a distinguised soldier in WW2
Two of Queen mother's brothers died in WW1 on the front line. Her ancestral home was turned into a convalescent home for soldiers and she helped nurses there.
The Queens parents led the nation very gallantly through WW2. Staying in London, visiting the bomb sites, Buck palace was bombed. They were under a lot of pressure to exhile to canada but they refused
Andrew is odious but has has seen full combat in the Falklands war.

Does he have any pals? Real ones, I mean

I couldn't say, but if he has they've not been noticeable in speaking up for him with any favourable anecdotes recently - neither for that matter have any of the couple's supposed "A lister" friends

In terms of friends, the only current ones he talks about with any real significance are a couple in Africa - who he has known since the Chelsey Davy years. He also idealises a friend who died as a teen - which is understandable but he often talks about this friend as though he was one of the only people that understood him. He would understand if he was still around etc.

You get the sense that a lot of friends have distanced themselves (or he has distanced himself from them).

Have any A-listers tweeted their support for H&M or that they like the book? Or have any royals elsewhere?

It is all quite sad at this point. I do worry for his mental health at this stage as the redemption arc he was banking on has failed to materialise with this book. He has been very publicly ridiculed in a manner that would destroy even those with the thickest of skins.

Their best bet I think would be to withdraw for a significant period, let the dust settle and then move on in a way that does not involve complaining about either the RF or the media.

How will they pay the bills though.

@Eyerollcentral succinctly & well put.

Bowers said ‘Meghan challenged every guest whose conversation contravened her values’ ‘According to Harry’s friends she reprimanded them about the slightest inappropriate nuance’. ‘She lacked any sense of humour.

Having been a ‘guest’ at a similar party I realised that my new boyfriend was looking for affirmation he was a ‘lucky bastard’ & I was suitably hot enough. Interestingly, Bowers mentions humour as that is what I employed to keep sane over the ridiculous weekend. If later recollections were I wasn’t ‘hot’ or ‘posh’ enough aka a ‘PLU’ I was toast. Thing is, funnily enough, I wouldn’t much care…

Also, what’s an ‘inappropriate nuance’? For me, did I let go by the comments about the ‘F ing peasants’ (aka ordinary people) & childish jokes about boobs & bums (possibly despite better judgement I did with ‘milder’ stuff). I did speak up using humour to throw back their ridiculous assertions when they crossed a line.

Reason I let things go to an extent was I was being generously hosted. Also within the 16 I find it hard to believe all were shocking & all wives & girlfriends too? We’re all products of our upbringing after all. Good hearted Sloanes do exist, etc. It’s only good manners not to make it ‘all about you’, also.

There is likely to have been a wife or girlfriend there M could have laughed & rolled eyes with at the more infantile stuff? Surely one amongst number, ‘ok’?

A clash of ‘Californian’ liberal values with what sound like largely the ‘Bullingdon Set’ was surely only going to be problematic? And if Meghan truly brought her yoga teacher with her surely Harry must have realised the event & this weekend not ideal time or venue?

If I was H I’d have said ‘look, these guys, they are my oldest mates from school & the Army. You might think them boors etc but behind the banter they’re amazing & supported me when I was in hell. Your values I respect etc but keep how much I love them in mind is all I’m asking’.

A ‘head’s up’ in other words, these don’t seem to have been as forthcoming as they might. These ‘archetypes’ are not always as they seem & many products of dysfunctional families & real benign neglect. Not to excuse the inexcusable but maybe hold your breath and count to ten on milder stuff and silly jokes?

How will they pay the bills though.
Or get Meghan the publicity she craves?

I agree lying low letting the dust settle would be the best thing but they have a book deal and need to either buy themselves out (not possible without Pa & Willy) or keep dishing the dirt.

Is Megs book going to be full of sore boobs and cracked nips 🤔 😅

I completely agree with you. Yet another example of Harry seeming to fail to prepare Meghan or have the backbone to say look they may go over the line but they are my good friends and I would love you all to get on. I don’t mean to say women should titter and laugh at everything the boys say but she seems devoid of any sense of humour. As you have said above ‘I did speak up using humour to throw back their ridiculous assertions when they crossed a line.’ in my own experience this is the best way to deal with these kind of situations, if nothing else you gain respect for being able to take a joke and being witty enough to hit back. I also find it incredible that there wasn’t one kindly other woman there to pal about with or indeed simply one bored of the usual crew and looking for a bit of diversion for 48 hours. Then again I am afraid to say I haven’t seen any indication that Meghan is a woman’s woman, she doesn’t seem to have hung on to many female friends and takes herself far too seriously to fit in with the kind of gang on weekend bender posing as a shooting party.

@Eyerollcentral spot on.

As to an American woman who nailed using humour to deflect upper class boorishness on a similar weekend many years before, I give you Kathleen ‘Kick’ Kennedy:
www.vogue.com/article/kathleen-kick-kennedy-biography/amp

When the other young British aristo women nicked the matching pair of best shoes for evening do & hid in maze for laugh, did she sob in her room? Did she hell..

No she toughed it out wearing mismatched & left pair shoes. When someone bitched saying she was walking oddly she said she must have forgot to pack right shoes smiling broadly…

Just one of the unpleasant things they did.

She won the lot of them over eventually…

I agree with PPs that Harry seemed to have done little to prepare Meghan for the realities of being a working Royal. Not sure whether it somehow didn't occur to him to help or whether he expected to RF to become more like Meghan.

I think that the RF should really consider following the lead of other RFs and introducing a mandatory orientation period. For example Sweden has obligatory Prince/Princess school for those that marry into the RF and choose to be working royals. They receive education and mentoring on subjects like diplomacy, etiquette, history, politics, languages and the organisation and workings of the royal household etc. This means that those who marry in know what to expect. Sweden has incorporated husbands/wives from divergent backgrounds in the RF. Prince Daniel (former personal trainer and gym owner) did 18 months before marrying Crown Princess Victoria. Princess Sofia . model and Paradise Hotel contestant (a bit like Love Island) did 6 months. On the other hand Chris O'Neill (married to Princess Madeleine) chose not to become a working Royal and kept his job in finance - they moved abroad and live in Florida.

Agreed. I’m 42 and had a miscarriage in July and I’m 8 weeks pregnant now. Both naturally conceived. Meghan could well have been fertile at her age and she had access to the best possible healthcare.

Sounds tough 🤔

Tbf they all told him he was moving too fast, but he wouldn’t listen. And several people did try to assist Meghan with the etiquette and protocol side of things but she didn’t want any help. I’m not a monarchist but on this occasion I don’t see what else they could have done. They weren’t really dealing with two reasonable people

Data trumps anecdote.

www.britishfertilitysociety.org.uk/fei/at-what-age-does-fertility-begin-to-decrease/

@Blossomtoes of course fertility declines, but it’s not true to suggest that Meghan is likely to have used a surrogate because of her age. And she had access to help such as IVF if she needed it, with no financial constraints. Anyway as long as my little anecdote is ok this time, I’m 😊

I've been thinking about why the birth descriptions are so sketchy and I could imagine Meghan wanting to keep her privacy and cool girl image intact and vetoing any descriptions of her pregnancy or real details of her birth - the Hollywood version of events is her popping out the babies in about ten minutes and drifting home on a cloud of love, whereas the reality would have been far messier even if she had a very straightforward pair of deliveries. If we ever get her version of being a mother (and I don't think we're going to be able to avoid it; it's an obvious book for her to write) it will be more 'fly free, little one, I thought as my beautiful child slid into the world, safe in the hands of his papa, so the first heartbeat he heard after mine was H's' than 'I was in misery from back ache and constant contractions but Harry was twatted on the nitrous oxide so he didn't care'.

Lol 😂

Oh I don't doubt that they were very difficult to deal with and refused to take any advice and Harry and Meghan were desperate to rush the wedding - I would argue that they should make the induction non-optional for those wanting to be working royals.

Have any A-listers tweeted their support for H&M or that they like the book? Or have any royals elsewhere?

Not as far as I'm aware, though happy to be corrected on that

The last thing I recall is Serena Williams, who last year said some nice things about Meghan herself and the wedding, but of course the wedding was a while ago now and certainly I've not heard any A-lister comments about the book

😂

😂
As an aside (and apologies for slight derail), I heave always wondered why all their naming of stuff is so linked and literal. Their son is called Archie, their foundation is Archewell, and Archie’s middle name is Harrison so literally “son of Harry”. They are not Icelandic 😆

I think they take themselves and Archie VERY seriously – PFB syndrome taken to extremes - and that seriousness extends to what names they chose. Looking back on my first years of being a parent I think you should be banned from making any major life decisions/changing jobs/moving house until the madness fades.

I had my DCs after the age of 41. Meghan has had two children. Please stop labouring your irrelevant point.

Very good @Mingmoo 😁I am very surprised Meghan let Harry talk about her epidural - that's not very woo-woo birth.

I am so dim, I never associated Harrison with Harry's son! I thought they might be Star Wars fans!

Arche is apparently Greek for words denoting origins/power. From Wiki: "first place", "method of government", "empire, realm", "authorities" "command"

Command Harry's Son!

It’s the first comment I’ve made on it. 🤷‍♀️