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Strangest bits in Spare…

1000 replies

Motorcycleemptyness · 15/01/2023 22:59

i haven’t quite finished it yet but I wanted to read a thread about some of the weirder bits of Spare, and I haven’t seen a thread where people were discussing those without the ‘H&M’ vs the rest of the RF debate. There are definitely some parts which have made me really question why they were included, and I was wondering if anyone else had any similar thoughts.

The inclusion of the imagery of the poppy fields, and how heroin funds the Taliban. Fair enough. We all know that. The rest of the book is one long ode to posh people taking drugs. Does Prince Harry think the cocaine he takes is gently knitted by fairies and delivered to him by unicorns? Do the drugs he takes not contribute to war and terrorism and misery across the rest of the world (and indeed misery and crime in the UK, where he is 5th in line to be monarch!) I found this quite a strange passage and I was wondering if anyone else had any thoughts, or am I just over thinking it?

Elizabeth Arden cream. ‘Mummy’s lips’. ‘Todger’. Why? But really, why? Why was this included? Why did anyone think it or commit it to paper, and then publish it? Why did I read it? Why am I typing it here? ARGH.

What he actually thinks the relationship between the royal family and the press should actually be. Only reporting true things? Someone had a photo of him taking cocaine. Dressed as a nazi. Calling his colleague a ‘P*ki’. He wasn’t happy, but it was all true. Should journalists not be allowed to report true things? Or should they only be reporting things he wants them to report? Does Andrew get to choose that too? What about everyone else?

What the actual royal family should look like. This was mind bending. He seems to be perfectly happy with the idea of the monarchy, an institution which is predicated on the idea that they’re inherently superior to the rest of us, and that’s their birth right, but seems to massively struggle to apply that to himself and William. If a monarchy is the best system, why shouldn’t the heir be treated differently to the spare? (I don’t believe it is the best system and wish we could abolish them all but I don’t understand how one can believe one but not the other!).

Anyone else have any interesting thoughts?

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bakalava · 16/01/2023 17:29

His children are unlikely to stay ginger. Infact, I don't think the older one is ginger anymore.

Eyerollcentral · 16/01/2023 17:29

comrad · 16/01/2023 17:24

@Eyerollcentral
he was devious enough to cast aspersions and back track and land high value contracts in secret then spin it that he’d had his hand forced. He’s more cunning than he lets on

also are you feeling better ? 💐(I think you mentioned you were poorly)

Well that is true! He’s just not a good guy. I’m getting there! Thanks so much

BellePeppa · 16/01/2023 17:30

Winterday1991 · 16/01/2023 16:56

the number of times he describes returning to Nottingham cottage to find M collapsed in a heap on the floor in tears. It just sounds quite calculated on her part.

She hears him coming up the drive then gets herself on the floor and squeezes out those tears. She has to work extra hard because it can’t just be one tear from the left eye. No, she has to let these one flow freely from both eyes because they have to literally splash on Archie or Harry. With much practice she now has it down to a fine art. 😭😭

OhIdoLike2bBesideTheSeaside · 16/01/2023 17:33

It'll be made into a film next 😳

comrad · 16/01/2023 17:34

A soap opera or a drama for evening cable tv? 😉

NotAnotherCrisis · 16/01/2023 17:35

Misfitmissy · 16/01/2023 09:11

I think all the evidence about drug taking has not been thought through. Meg would be able to divorce Haz anyway but his access rights to the children could be curtailed on the basis of his self confessed drug use.

I wouldn't have thought historical drug use would restrict access?

Theunamedcat · 16/01/2023 17:36

Thought it was legal over there anyway?

Blossomtoes · 16/01/2023 17:38

NotAnotherCrisis · 16/01/2023 17:35

I wouldn't have thought historical drug use would restrict access?

Show quote history

Do we really think it’s historic? He was still at it in Canada.

BellePeppa · 16/01/2023 17:38

comrad · 16/01/2023 17:19

Honestly, the bare bones of the anecdotes he’s included are quite meh and dull. Because he relates them in a hyper manic tone that oscillates between grand gothic literature, trashy teen romance novel and self help manual
etc and because of his lack of self awareness, it’s funny. He reminds me of Alan partridge tbh. He has had access to things us mere mortals can only dream about. He’s a waster that’s squandered away so many golden opportunities. He has smokes and snorts his way through life, eats whole packets of opal fruits at once (for the hit), with women on a ‘conveyor belts’, hunting shooting fishing and drinking away - it’s a pretty unimaginative existence tbh. He also has something reminiscent of Patrick Bateman about him, the anecdote regaling reminds me of axe swinging Bateman waxing lyrical about genesis (that was his attempt of sounding on trend and hip cos in reality beneath the glitz glamour hedonism he was vacuous - just like the hero of spare). No way do I believe the editors / publishers / ghost writers would have axed the good stuff and kept in the inane tangents. This is the ‘good’ content. People are lapping it up cos it’s a comical farce, not cos it’s a spiritual social global awakening, where the plebs are freed from Murdochs yoke, rallied by the post-starburst come-down ramblings of a white privileged rich middle aged balding man posh party boy. Lampooning and satirising the aristocracy has been a long held tradition. Usually they don’t happily provide the material for the lampooning themselves.usually the price would never be high enough. Maybe some medieval peasants thought the royals held a ‘mystique’ but we’ve moved on quite a way since then.

Re Alan Partridge, Meghan is David Brent incarnate. I kid you not, the similarities are on YouTube 😁

HaroldsWilly · 16/01/2023 17:42

comrad · 16/01/2023 17:34

A soap opera or a drama for evening cable tv? 😉

The Crown. Starring Harold and Meg as themselves. Scripted from the book/his interviews/the documentary. Complete with ridiculous over-acting.

’Truth (subjective, but definitely just as valid as objective fact)’ is definitely stranger than fiction...

MonsoonMadness · 16/01/2023 17:43

Sugarfree23 · 16/01/2023 17:27

Purely my guess, I'd imagine the Royal Palaces are guarded as one place.

Kensington Palace for example houses lots of Royals in their own apartments and Notts Cottage in the grounds. So it makes sense to me for the exterior to be guarded rather than the individual apartments and houses. Although I'd imagine they'll have intruder alarm buttons dotted about along with fire alarm buttons.

Not sure how it would have worked when William and Kate stayed on Anglesey as the house wasn't very big and Kate made a comment about not having staff on Anglesey, and finding nights tough when William was working and it was just her and George at home.

Show quote history

I think they had a cottage on the grounds. I remember reading that somewhere at the time.

NotAnotherCrisis · 16/01/2023 17:44

Oh, not sure @Blossomtoes , haven't read it 😬 Strange thing to admit in public if you have small children!

MonsoonMadness · 16/01/2023 17:46

BellePeppa · 16/01/2023 17:30

She hears him coming up the drive then gets herself on the floor and squeezes out those tears. She has to work extra hard because it can’t just be one tear from the left eye. No, she has to let these one flow freely from both eyes because they have to literally splash on Archie or Harry. With much practice she now has it down to a fine art. 😭😭

Show quote history

I was just astonished that she should tell Harry she's actively suicidal and can't be left alone, just before a big event that they are due to attend, knowing his own mental health is shot and his mother was killed when he was 12. Honestly., however bad you felt, you wouldn't do that. She had access to the best help available on her doorstep. I just don't buy the 'no one would help me' routine. She could have picked up the phone anytime and got seen the same day. She lived in the centre of london.

ancientgran · 16/01/2023 17:47

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

I don't hug, hate being hugged. I don't hug GC either, cuddle them when they are babies but to be honest I don't think kids generally like being hugged. I'm close to my kids and GC, do lots for them loads of childcare and any support they need. I just don't like hugging.

I would have them sitting on my lap like Charles with Louis at the Jubilee.

Greentree1 · 16/01/2023 17:47

Wasn't it Diana that first mentioned the heir and the spare when she was questioned about having more children and she said she had the heir and the spare and wasn't a brood mare (or something like that). I think she and Charles were falling out at that time.

Patineur · 16/01/2023 17:48

Ridemeginger · 16/01/2023 16:15

I dunno. Peace talks might be Charles chucking a chunky file on the negotiation table entitled "Harry: the Shit He Got Up To The Palace Was Able To Suppress." Or a little chat with M16 about the security harm he's done/ doing. I am not wholly convinced Harry has a lot of juicy blackmail material. The stuff in Spare is pretty lame. I think the 400 pages removed may well have been whinging drivel about minor rubbish that the editors knew would make him look (even more) stupid and petty. I reckon Harry's puffed up sense of his own self importance (and lack of historical knowledge) means that he thinks the Great Travesty of 1998, When William Got Pa's Last Rolo, feels like an episode deserving inclusion in the annals of Royal history.

I agree he's unlikely to have anything very exciting in reserve. He's also n ow got quite a major problem with basic credibility.

KAYMACK · 16/01/2023 17:53

I too noted the points about PH forever returning home to find MM "on the floor in floods of tears"... given that she is an actress. Hmmmm....

Regarding all the drug taking, there was a time that people were saying online that Doria had been in prison! I am not sure if that was just cruel rumours or not.

Those of us of a certain age will recall Diana joking in public about having produced a "spare". There is nothing new in it. That was also the reason why medieval parents had tons of children - because there was so much risk healthwise that they needed loads of them to even ensure a couple survived. Even later, you had Queen Anne producing umpteen princes and princesses... not one survived!

Zosime · 16/01/2023 17:53

I would have them sitting on my lap like Charles with Louis at the Jubilee.

There are some lovely pics of Charles holding Louis when he was a baby and toddler.

Here and Here

Theunamedcat · 16/01/2023 17:58

Louis seems to love his grandad remember when he played up for his mom putting his hand over her mouth and everything? he only settled on grandads lap

bakalava · 16/01/2023 17:58

Part of his downfall has been his complete naivety. Diana wanted her boys to be more streetwise but she never had a clue herself what that looked like. After she died, i don't think any efforts were made to encourage proper social mixing.
Therefore, when a Californian woman came along with the whole load of cliched attitudes, pastimes and beliefs, it must have seemed marvelous to him as it appears to be aimed at all (princey-wincey included). However, reading his reaction to a Faulker meme online (how could it be describing my family?)he still has a long way to go. Faulkner memes are everywhere online, especially in those quarters, First stage of his awakening is to be astounded and embrace it all. Second stage will be to realise that it is not as simple as it reads and he has basically accumulated a bunch of other people's interests and beliefs which he will need to process in order to achieve at least a miniscule amount of self awareness.

MsBucket · 16/01/2023 18:02

comrad · 15/01/2023 23:10

Also in places, so hyperbolic it can’t be taken seriously. Especially when he is idealising / devaluing women.

I haven’t read the full thread. Just read the first few so far, not sure I’ll have time to read the rest. @comrad This made me curious, in what way is Harry doing that in his book?

Patineur · 16/01/2023 18:03

Not being able to access doctors seems to be a bit of a theme, whether it's in relation to mental illness or a frostbitten penis. Does he ever explain why it was so difficult, apart from the obvious nonsense around worrying that the reasons would get out?

Eyerollcentral · 16/01/2023 18:05

MsBucket · 16/01/2023 18:02

I haven’t read the full thread. Just read the first few so far, not sure I’ll have time to read the rest. @comrad This made me curious, in what way is Harry doing that in his book?

Show quote history

Idealising…

Strangest bits in Spare…
MsBucket · 16/01/2023 18:05

This seems to be the second thread under trending about Harry’s book from the Homepage. I wonder if we can have a mega thread to avoid any repetitions?

BellePeppa · 16/01/2023 18:05

MonsoonMadness · 16/01/2023 17:46

I was just astonished that she should tell Harry she's actively suicidal and can't be left alone, just before a big event that they are due to attend, knowing his own mental health is shot and his mother was killed when he was 12. Honestly., however bad you felt, you wouldn't do that. She had access to the best help available on her doorstep. I just don't buy the 'no one would help me' routine. She could have picked up the phone anytime and got seen the same day. She lived in the centre of london.

Show quote history

Or it could just be another fairytale that never happened. 🤔

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