Please tell me you also have cats that completely fail at catting 🙀

[YelramBob]

How many cats does it take to catch a pigeon? Answers on a postcard please before I post pictures....

Pigeons are bigger than my cat who is 100% convinced she is a Chihuahua to the point that eats their food and sleeps in their bed and chases balls. Pigeons are for barking at through the upstairs window, not for catching.

That sounds completely reasonable, what would your cat/chihuahua do if she came face to face with a fat bastard pigeon?

A. Tap with her paw
B. Sit down and have a rest
C. Get bored and walk off

D. Run away squawking for help because it's a lot bigger and flappier up close than when ack-acking at it from the window.

🤣

E: get all excited, crouch down, run at it slowly and watch it fly away

Always like secret option D 😉

I'm now going to attach pics of my fearless kitties when they came face to face with a pigeon this afternoon, they may take a minute to upload...

It would depend which Chihuahua she was with. She is a follower. If she was with Beelzebub she would challenge the pigeon to a fight to the death and then runaway crying for help when it accepted the challenge.

If she was with Moo she would not be near the pigeon because how very dare you suggest she goes outside. Outside is where the dirt and weather is.

If she was with Tiny their shared, single braincell wouldn't register that there was a pigeon.

If she was with Augustus she would kill the pigeon while he cowered in the corner. She is very protective of him. He is her kitten.

My little cat has never caught anything, she gives it a good go but is absolutely terrible at it. The big one has just fallen off the windowsill...

Apex predators at their finest!
I also have a tabby although she's rather feisty. Over the years she has murdered: an assortment of mice, shrews, a chaffinch (found positioned on its back inside my husbands welly), a magpie, rabbits, a few large rats (one found beside my bed, another deposited alive on the living room floor destined for further torture), and a large pigeon!

That's impressive, can you send your hardcore tabby girl my way please to train my three useless lumps 😹

My previous three were brutal, no mammals but a selection of insects and reptiles mostly 🫣

Years ago I temped on a rural industrial site on the Isle of Sheppey. There was a stray cat would hang around the car park - not big at all, maybe 3-3.5kg, and there were a few permanent staff who would feed it.

It was seen to bring down an adult seagull once! I've seen it take down a large blackbird myself.

Believe me, you don't want a cat who is partial to pigeons!
My rescue cat Herbie, 5yrs, seems to think it's his mission to deplete the pigeon population round here. Since we've had him(3yrs), he's caught around 8 that we know of. And it's not pleasant to find them when he brings them in.
Once he posted one alive, through the catflap and it was very startled.

I have a hilarious video of our cat running towards the cat flap with a pigeon in his mouth, dropping it, catching it again, then repeatedly attempting to go through the cat flap with it. There's a good few minutes of it sitting in the cat flap tunnel as the cat rolls around waving his paws in the air, jumping sideways etc before the pigeon goes "fuck this" and flies off.

Our first kitty who was a small enough female once got a pigeon on the sloping roof of our house, jumped back through the velux window and down two flights of stairs with it in her mouth. I eventually managed to get the pigeon out the back door using a sweeping brush. There were a lot of feathers all over the house afterwards and the pigeon eventually flew off😁.

My cat, all 6 fluffy kgs of him, was chased by a squirrel the other day. He ran across a road and along a fence to escape. Bless him.

It's got to the point where we're actually relieved when all he brings in are mice (which he did twice last week).
As I was typing my previous post, Herbie spotted some pigeons outside and raced off through his catflap! He's just returned empty pawed.

That sounds like a Simon's Cat video 🤣

@Pianoaholic I definitely don't want mine to catch the pigeons. I was just bemused when they surrounded it but didn't know what to do next, it sat there all 'Bring it on, furry fuckers'.

@Allergictoironing I bet no one had their chips pinched by seagulls there 😱

Two of my childhood cats, who were big kittens at the time managed to corner a pigeon in the conservatory. Needless to say they came out of it worse than the pigeon. So my answer is more than two.

That properly made me laugh 🤣

Dcat is a ragdoll, faced with a pigeon she would scurry in and demand back up from mum, she is the most useless cat ever!😻

She literally struggles to catch a moth and she only has one top fang due to a badly timed jump so she doesn’t bother to jump much anymore either.

She is basically a very fluffy potato😻

Mine wouldn't have a clue what to do. My dear deceased cat was a brilliant hunter, sometimes we'd get two or three trophies in one evening, and the other one would try to take it off her and pass it off as her own but it never worked, we all know she's too thick to catch anything.

Cat 1. From the window she is a fearless pigeon killer. From the garden she'd run away in terror.

Cat 2. Pigeon would be dead. No flapping in his mouth and escaping, dead at first bite. He doesn't mess around.

For this, and many other reasons, Cat 2 is not allowed outside anymore.

Last week I went into the garden office. There were a number of feathers on the floor and my bolshy Birman girl sitting in the middle of them looking innocent. I picked her up. She was sitting on a bird. Bird flew off out the door. Birman looked miffed.

F. Stare at it for a while. Know from experience that it is too big and flappy so turn round and wander back to the garden chair and fall asleep on the cushion. ( See also: pheasant)

These stories are amazing 😹 So reassuring we have our ferocious house tigers/panthers to protect us from harm.